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There is no way I could possibly write an accurate portrayal of myself in this little thing. I am way too multi-faceted, and the things I say might not be the things you see. I prefer to let everyone form their own opinion of me. Having said that, here are some of my more interesting bits.

I know every parent says this, but my son means everything to me. We are incredibly close. I would try to say more about it, but you really just have to see us together to understand. Btw, he's freaking awesome.

I am an ENFP.

My favorite color is clear.

I'm learning how to speak French.

I spend a good portion of every day thinking about how to improve myself. I simply cannot stand the thought of stagnant personal growth.

I support gay rights.

I am unflinchingly honest.

I think society's "norms" need to be rewritten and it will take something huge to do it.

I look forward to December 21, 2012.

There are a lot of layers to me. I don't believe necessarily that any one religion is correct and take my beliefs from a blend of pagan, Buddhist, and Taoist philosophies, but I belong to no single group and detest organized religion. I also simultaneously believe in Jesus and in magick, but as with Christianity, I feel many of magick's modern practitioners are largely missing the point. Maybe I just keep having bad experiences with them...

I really enjoy the company of unique people.

I want others to explore the world and have adventures with me. People without stories are... well, boring.

I really enjoy cooking and can bake wicked cookies, cakes, and cupcakes.

People tend to either love me and think I'm witty and charming or hate me because I'm an arrogant asshole. There really isn't much middle ground for some reason.

I'm really not an arrogant asshole, I'm just very confident in what I know I can do. That throws some people off.

I don't wear jewelry or a watch, yet somehow, I almost always know what time it is.

I absolutely love to play guitar.

Sometimes I say things that seem completely out of place or make people seriously do a double take without ever realizing what I've said.

Most of the time that I come off like a jerk I'm really just thinking I'm being funny and failing miserably at it.

I'd do almost anything for my friends and family.

I love to travel, and have been to eight countries. That means I only have sixty or so to go.

I have never been farther west than Wyoming, yet I want to move to California, Oregon, or Washington. Haven't quite made up my mind on that one just yet. Just anywhere that isn't Mississippi is fine with me, really.

I can solve a Rubik's cube.

I am polyamorous. This does not mean that I attempt to sleep with every woman I meet. And I will not EVER cheat. Also, if my partner does not agree with polyamory, I don't practice it.

I can be a handful by myself. ;D

I love animals. I actually wanted to be an animal doctor before I decided to become a people doctor. People bite less when they don't feel well.

I have four cats and a ball python. I don't have a dog because I don't have a backyard.

I hate the way people treat our planet.

For that matter, I hate the way people treat each other, too. It's like everyone has forgotten that we are all in this together, regardless of race, creed, gender, or sexuality. You're human, right? Yeah, me too. Imagine that.

I really like to shoot pool.

I invented a game called Nutsack (stupid name, awesome game) that has spread its way across the country. Message for details/how to play.

Going to school to be a doctor. That's about it at the moment, but it seems all-consuming at times.

Accomplishing what I set out to do.

I can make better stupid faces than anyone I have ever met. Useless talent for sure, but it's damn funny.

Video games.

Naming obscure movie lines. I am a moviephile.

I am an incredible procrastinator. I can have someone yelling at me to finish my work and the next thing they know, they are naked at a pool with me wondering how the hell they got there.

I'm also really good at cunning linguistics.

My build... I work hard at it, so I'm in pretty good shape. Then they notice my smile and eyes. Then my personality. For some reason that's always last even though I have a very vibrant personality. Unless I'm approached from my back, then I usually get a comment about my ass. I guess that's what eighteen years of mixed martial arts gets me.

Oh, yeah, and I have these tiny little ears that are totally out of place on my head. At least I'm not a platypus.

OK... let's see...
Books: Prometheus Rising, Uriel's Machine, Hitchhiker's Guide trilogy, Seth Speaks, Ishmael, really liked the Da Vinci Code and Angels and Demons, The Celestine Prophecy, anything numerology, Neil Gaiman, and I really enjoy the Harry Potter books and the Lord of the Ring series, The Zombie Survival Guide, Ishmael, The Way of the Peaceful Warrior, Behold a Pale Horse, Holy Blood, Holy Grail, and any book from which I can learn something.

Movies: I am an absolute movie nerd. I couldn't tell you how many favorites I have, and my collection has recently grown to nearly 600 titles. I should probably be a film critic, but I have a soul.

OK, after much procrastination, I have decided to finally put up my movie list. However, to keep it short, I have decided only to include movies that I own. Here goes:
8 Mile, The 11th Hour, 12 Monkeys, 28 Weeks Later, 30 Days of Night, The 40-Year-Old Virgin, 300, The Abyss, Accepted, Adaptation, Airplane!, Alien, Aliens, Amadeus, American Beauty, American History X, American Psycho, Army of Darkness, Arsenic and Old Lace, Batman Begins, Beerfest, Beowulf, Big, Big Fish, The Big Lebowski, Black Hawk Down, Blazing Saddles, Blood Diamond, The Blues Brothers, Boondock Saints, Borat, Bowling for Columbine, Braveheart, Brotherhood of the Wolf, Caddyshack, Casino Royale, Cat Ballou, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, Charlie Bartlett, Chasing Amy, Children of Men, Clerks, Clerks II, Clue, The Constant Gardener, Constantine, Cool Hand Luke, The Count of Monte Cristo, Crash, Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon, The Crow, Dances with Wolves, The Dark Knight, Dazed and Confused, The Departed, Die Hard, Dogma, Donnie Darko, Eastern Promises, Edward Scissorhands, The Emperor's New Groove, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, The Evil Dead, The Evil Dead 2, Fahrenheit: 9/11, The Family Stone, Fargo, Fast Times at Ridgemont High, Fear of a Black Hat, The Fifth Element, Fight Club, First Blood, A Fish Called Wanda, Forrest Gump, Four Weddings and a Funeral, The Fugitive, Full Metal Jacket, Gangs of New York, Ghostbusters, Gladiator, Glory, The Goonies, Grandma's Boy, The Great Escape, Halloween by Rob Zombie, Harry and the Hendersons, Harry Potter series, The Heartbreak Kid, Hero, Hot Fuzz, i heart huckabees, In the Mouth of Madness, An Inconvenient Truth, The Incredible Hulk, Indiana Jones-all of them, Iron Man, The Jacket, Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back, Juno, Kill Bill, King Arthur, Peter Jackson's King Kong, kiss kiss bang bang, Knocked Up, The Last King of Scotland, The Last Samurai, Legends of the Fall, Life of Brian, Lock, Stock, and Two Smoking Barrels, The Lord of the Rings, Lucky # Slevin, The Matrix, Memento, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, O Brother, Where Art Thou?, Office Space, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Ong-Bak: the Thai Warrior, Pan's Labyrinth, Pi, Pineapple Express, Pirates of the Caribbean, Platoon, Pootie Tang, The Princess Bride, The Professional, Prozac Nation, Pulp Fiction, Rambo, Requiem for a Dream, Reservoir Dogs, The Road to Wellville, Rocky, Romeo and Juliet, S.F.W., Saved!, Saving Private Ryan, A Scanner Darkly, Secretary, Se7en, Shakespeare in Love, Shaun of the Dead, The Shawshank Redemption, The Shining, Sicko, The Silence of the Lambs, The Simpsons Movie, Sin City, Sleepers, Snatch, Spaceballs, Spiderman 1 & 2, Stand By Me, Star Wars-all of them, Stardust, Stripes, Super Troopers, The Tao of Steve, Tenacious D and the Pick of Destiny, Terminator 2, Titanic, Transformers, Troy, The Truman Show, Underworld, Unleashed, The Untouchables, V for Vendetta, Waiting..., Wedding Crashers, What About Bob?, Who Framed Roger Rabbit?, The Whole Nine Yards, Willow, and Young Frankenstein.

Well... I told you there were a lot of them. :D

Music: Like with movies, I have a very broad musical taste. Maybe it's because I am a musician. I enjoy almost all types of music with the exception of country (there are a few really good songs, but I don't ever listen to them), and some of the worse emo bands. I'm really fond of Tool, APC, Metallica, Pearl Jam, Pantera, Tupac, Eminem, Mozart, Beethoven, Liszt, Bach, Led Zepplin, Pink Floyd, Jimi Hendrix, Enya, GNR, Joe Satriani, Dragonforce, Alice in Chains, Bloodhound Gang, Bush, Chevelle]], [{Days of the New, Flyleaf, Linkin Park, The Eagles, Fleetwood Mac, David Gilmour, Eric Johnson, Green Day, Morcheeba, Jaco Pastorius, Mastodon, Staind, Santana, Nickelback, Red Hot Chili Peppers, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Trans-Siberian Orchestra, Andy McKee, Justin King... there are a lot more but I don't want to type them all... you get the idea.

Food: Hands down, it's Italian. Love some Italian. Chinese is good too. And sushi and fondue could very well be the only things I crave as much as Italian food.

My son, guitar, water, oxygen, food, and my head. I'd be screwed if I lost that thing.

Very different stuff than anyone would expect... I'm a Scorpio, so I tend to keep what I'm thinking to myself. It's really hard to tell just by looking at me. It's nothing bad, just stuff to keep my mind busy because I get bored WAY too easily. I daydream about the universe and its chaotic order and I spend a lot of time pondering the nature of things and philosophy. I'm one of those guys that has a lot going on in his head most of the time.

Yes, I am. You can find me being on most other nights too. As a matter of fact, I am currently being right now. Unless I'm dead. Man, I hope not, though... that would just about RUIN my day.

I am callipygian.

I glow in the dark. This has caused me problems most of my life.

I just can't stand chewing gum. Whether it's me or someone else, it simply disgusts me.

I think Christianity is the single worst thing to happen to humanity in the past ten thousand years or so, with the possible exception of the burning of the library in Alexandria.

And I hate the Rocky Horror Picture Show. It is the dumbest movie I have ever had the misfortune of seeing. And going to Rocky conventions isn't fun. It's stupid. Because it's a stupid damn movie. I have had people tell me that I just don't get it. No, I get it. And it's stupid. Like Final Fantasy. That franchise can't even get the name right. It's "Final" Fantasy, yet there are somehow about twenty different titles. Final, my eye.

And I cuss a lot. I'm not trying to be rude, I just don't see why one combination of letters is more offensive than another combination of letters that means the same damn thing.

You feel like messaging me.

I think this is easier answered if asked differently, like "You really SHOULDN'T message me if...".

Then I could say that you really shouldn't message if you are recently escaped from any sort of forced-stay institution (i.e. mental ward, prison, etc.), if you are just extraordinarily Christian (you wouldn't like me very much-it's okay-I like you), close-minded, or one of those people that lives in an alternate reality.

Everyone else is cool, though.