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John-the-Aptest

21 M Canton, MI

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 10:09pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Virgo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Dropped out of space camp
Job
Other
Income
Less than $20,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), German (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I'm a huge food and film buff working on becoming a chef and finding a Netflix cuddle buddy.
What I’m doing with my life
Right now I'm doing everything I can to chase my passion. I attend culinary school and work for one of the best chefs in Detroit.
I’m really good at
Making dumb jokes that make me laugh more than anyone else... hence the name.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'm amazed every time I read The Picture of Dorian Gray, Lolita, or anything from Chuck Palahniuk. I fall in love with anything hilariously dark.

If you have a secret desire to reenact any scenes from Lost in Translation, I am your man.

Archer, Mad Men, True Detective, and Game of Thrones top the list. I want so badly to put Dexter on here but not if it means supporting the last few seasons.

Music is impossible to choose. I spend the most time listening to either trip-hop (like Massive Attack and UNKLE) or alternative rock (The Strokes, Radiohead) but I couldn't live without Ludivico Einaudi and a million other artists. Like almost everyone seems to say, I really do listen to pretty much everything except country.
My last.fm profile is at http://www.last.fm/user/ObsidianArbiter if you want to check it out.

Any food that I'm about to try for the first time is instantly my favorite. Whether I'll still like it after I've put it in my mouth is irrelevant.
The six things I could never do without
Sarcasm
A fucking ridiculous metabolism
Umami
Personal growth
Discovery
The search for my sixth
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Existentialist nonsense.
On a typical Friday night I am
Cooking for rich people.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I spend an embarrassing amount of time on the internet.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 18–26
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
You're willing to say more than "Hey". It's not that I don't appreciate you going out on a limb to kick things off; I just want a little personality.