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Johnny-Onetime

24 M Cincinnati, OH

My Details

Last Online
Aug 21
Orientation
Gay
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Working on university
Job
Law
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Why did Princess Diana cross the road?

Because she wasn't wearing a seat belt.

I've been told to start with a joke, so that explains the joke. I love jokes. If I genuinely laugh with someone, it's just a good way to break the ice and start having some fun.

I like when people are passionate about something. It can be ANYTHING, and I think it's really cool. For me, that something is Stand up Comedy. I'm a Comedy nerd. Patton Oswalt is my favorite, but I enjoy Louis CK, Jim Gaffigan, Amy Schumer, Ellen Degeneres, Maria Bamford, and Eugene Mirman to name a few (look up Eugene Mirman: How to Nab a Husband on YouTube, it's worth it).

I like to think of myself as quick witted and try very hard to win people over by making them laugh. What can I say? I love to laugh!

Well big deal, right? Everyone loves to laugh! It would be the creepiest thing if you met someone, made them laugh and they would hate it. "hahahaha... Oh damn! Laughter... grrrrr!" >:O
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I am a Chemical Engineer and I'm finishing my first semester of Law School to become a Patent Attorney.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Piano, Chess (I actually just started playing a bit more recently. Magnus Carlsen is a BEAST!), Super Smash Bros (bring it on!), Math. I play tennis and frisbee golf for fun. I also do Stand up Comedy at open mics occasionally.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sense of humor hands down.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Harry Potter Series, Lord of the Flies, Does God Play Dice?, Anything by David Foster Wallace (namely Brief Interviews with Hideous Men).

Movies: Black Swan, The Dark Knight, Anchorman, Zoolander, Monty Python and the Holy Grail, Step Brothers, Role Models, Most things with Will Ferrell in it is usually a good bet.

Shows: I love South Park and Louie. I used to enjoy Family Guy all of the time, but now it's hit or miss. Futurama is great too. Arrested Development, Stella, and Drawn Together were probably the three greatest shows I've ever seen cancelled before their prime. When I watch TV, which isn't often at all anymore, I usually watch Comedy Central for stand up or roasts and stuff.

I'm kind of big into musical theater too. I'm not an actor or singer or anything, and I talk about it only when it's brought up. My iPod consists mainly of show tunes and stand up acts (it's the gayest iPod on the planet; I realize and accept this).

Music: Oldies and show tunes. Sinatra, Nat King Cole, Dion and the Belmonts. Cole Porter is a personal hero of mine. It's Delovely is my #1 favorite song ever. However, if we're going to dance... the new stuff is great. I know none of the lyrics (probably for the best), but the beats get me going, and that's really what the goal is when dancing: to dance!

Food: I love most of it. Onions can BURN IN RIGHTEOUS FIRE! but other than that, I'm not picky really. Steak is probably my favorite. Can't go wrong on a hunk with meat.... and a steak (I hate MYSELF for that little joke, but damn it, I'm leaving it)!
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Stand up Comedy!! (Listen to some Patton Oswalt and thank me later)
Musical Theater
Piano
Friends to party with
Computer
My lucky astrology mood watch... (that's a Steve Martin joke, and a joke here)
My extroverted nature
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Out on the town.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like guys
  • Ages 18–26
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to go to a bar sometime to dance or chill. I actually prefer a hole-in-the-wall bar to dance clubs, but I can get my groove on with the best of them. :)