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47 Silver Spring, MD Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 36–48
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Jan 25
Black, Other
5′ 6″ (1.68m)
Body Type
Christianity, but not too serious about it
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Has a kid, and might want more
English, French (Okay), Portuguese (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
My ex, a fearless and brilliant journalist, once told me I wrote beautifully, I think because I casually use words like "bacchanalia" and know my way around Strunk & White's. This time, I'm more interested in authenticity, having learned some long overdue, difficult lessons.

I'm a work in progress, to say the least...

Wow, it looks like I wrote War and Peace. Scary part is I haven't even really started this part. Well, if you read all of the below, you either are interested, or work for a publishing company. Mail me either way.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Being a dad, changing careers, tweeting about randomness
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Many things, cooking and algorithms, for instance.

Learning things easily, gaining wisdom the hard way.

Emergency repairs on sump pumps, changing tires in sketchy areas at 3 am, with no questions asked.

If snowblowing ever becomes an Olympic event, I'm bringing home the gold.

I'm the love child of Grandma Moses and Picasso when it comes to finger painting stick figures.

Finding humor in bad situations, being kind regardless of the circumstances.

Best of all, I've become a brilliant dad again.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'd love to say something amazing here, but really, probably my hair. After that, probably how fast I speak.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I read everything. Arundhati Roy, Rohinton Mistry, Kozol, Bell Hooks, Faulkner, Hemingway, Roth, the back of the cereal box, LOTR,GoT, countless cookbooks, Piketty, Krugman. Forget gunpowder, the most important thing the Chinese invented was the movable print press. Pablo Neruda, Gabril, Stephen King, my list is legion. Except V.S. Naipaul.

Movies, it's really tough for me to sit still for 90 minutes, but I love the brilliant awfulness of blaxploitation films. Earlier Tarantino, Reservoir Dogs was better than Pulp Fiction, btw, but he's a bit too into the whole expropriation thing for my tastes. Hitchcock, the Birds, Vertigo, Rear Window; he was a creepy dude, but a genius. Almodovar, Best in Show, really any Parker Posey film. Grosse Pointe Blank speaks to me.

TV: Discovery, Food Network, BBC, that sort of thing. I've never seen Glee, American Idol, or Real Housewives of anywhere. Oh, and Jeopardy. Unplugging from CNBC has added years to my sanity.

Music is an aural kaleidoscope of the people and times that made me who I am. Coltrane playing with the top down coming down the West Side Highway on that perfect sunny Sunday morning, Boukman Eksperyans voodou songs in Miami, Sade as the moon hangs over the ocean. The Lupe, AC/DC, PE, Zeppelin playlist for difficult climbs. The Cult, The Clash, Jack White, Cash ( Johnny and Money), Ella, Monk, Miles, Siouxsie, Biggie, BDP, Irakere, Cubanismo, J Alemany and Jay Z, Chucho Valdes, the Escovedo family. Chuck Brown, Eva Cassidy, Cesaria Evora, Donny Hathaway, Earth, Wind and Fire. Stevie Wonder, Songs in the Key of Life is the most brilliant album ever made, and please make my funk the PFunk. Beautiful memories...

And I love Miley Cyrus. Not her, or her music, but as a symbol of the shape of things to come. Even stranger, N Minaj is growing on me. Like a fungus, but growing still.

Food: Isn't my entire profile about pigs, cows, lambs, and goats? I love food and the living, evolving cultural history it represents. I'll eat pretty much anything under the right circumstances, though cow eyeballs were very something. Add a good wine or mint tea if in a Muslim country, and life is beautiful.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I certainly can do without the writer's block that has me in thrall.

That issue aside, I never have been great at following rules I find to be arbitrary, so here's my list of things I choose not do without.

The past 18 months have been a remarkable journey of rediscovery and reclamation of what is truly important to me.

1) My daughter. She's my heart.

2) My family, regardless of actual shared DNA. No way to ever fully express my love and gratitude for everything they've done, from encouraging me to be happy to making sure even as I transitioned to my next phase, nothing skipped a beat.

3) The freedom, opportunities, and experiences my former career provided, and to a lesser extent, still does provide me. No way in the world I would be able to take what was essentially a Walter Mitty fantasy idea to start a barbecue shack and turn it into reality without the knowledge and resources my finance career afforded me.

4) The newfound, or maybe the long forgotten sense of wonder and joy I get each morning as I wake up before sunrise.

All for the moment, I'd rather not write silliness about wine or iPhones or coffee
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Well, more like 4 seconds just now, but why people on OKC who have indicated they would strongly prefer to date their same race check out others, namely me, who clearly are not of the same racial background.

Seriously though, according to Twitter, I spend hours thinking about developing a unified theory of finance, politics kids, food and culture, all with more than a soupçon of ADHD, leavened by random, demented brilliance. Or something like that...

If after a year of cooking dead animals and feeding the public, I'll run screaming back to finance. Then I laugh. Hard. Then go back to trying to figure out what to do with a massive pizza oven before an equally massive smoker gets here from Oklahoma.

Those particularly ignominious moments like when playing Name That Tune with my then SO's family, what the hell would possess me to pick the Zeppelin line about "Shake for me girl/ I wanna be your backdoor man"?

What tomorrow holds.

What will daughter be when she grows up.

The Gini coefficient in America.

How to get to Brazil for the Cup.

The Irish patent cliff, and why I didn't think of that phrase.

The reaalllly long and occasionally witty comments I just accidentally deleted. Damn, damn, damn

Who really got the "damn, damn, damn" was from Good Times

Why JJ Walker is such an odious, self loathing, cretin of the highest, or lowest, actually, order.

Is 50 Shades of Grey (or Gray, whatevs) the 2010s version of Eat Pray Love for the naggingly unsatisfied?

What is going to happen during the inaugural Bad Black Films and BBQ Festival, held in the backyard July 4th weekend, when my friends and I put a 900 pound cow on a contraption we designed to allow it to hang above a fire. It's name is the Iron Maiden, I think, since it looks like something out of a dungeon on Game of Thrones, or something Condeleeza Rice used on Bush Jr. Same idea...

Aw hell, it's name is now Condi.

Assuming Condi doesn't break and try to kill us in the process, how long does a half ton of steak take to cook? Can 100 people eat that much over two days? What will we do with Condi after the cow is done?

I'm Gonna Get You Sucka or Don't Be A Menace to the Hood as the capstone film? Or better yet, should I just show all of Tyler Perry's body of work for three days? Lol, that's too easy...

How it's amazing to be so excited over such small stuff. And how shocked I am not to be concerned in the least about not going to Brazil 14.

Update: Condi failed worse than her namesake. If I start digging a pit now, I might be finished by July.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
These days, playing in the kitchen, working on rubs and sauces with a glass of wine and my ipad to record what I'm doing. Or watching my kid at gymnastics. Out to dinner with friends, or in the gym.

Hopefully, next month, I'll be tearing out the old stuff in the restaurant, and coming home late and dirty.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Today, I'm willing to admit in the process of rebuilding a fence, mucking out a sump pump, and caulking basement windows for my sister's partner, my left hand looks like a misshapen lump of epoxy covered with a delicate layer of urea foam.

Edit: that was earlier. Now I just don't have any finger prints or the top layer of my finger nails.

But her yard and basement are back in order. I'll call this one a draw...
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you like bright, funny, offbeat guys who are amazing around the house, and somehow turned out to be great dads, definitely message or mail me.