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26 Chicago, IL Woman


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–28
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Jun 28
Queer, Pansexual, Sapiosexual
5′ 2″ (1.57m)
Body Type
When drinking
Libra, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Open relationship
Has cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Very busy & living with my partner but wanting to take the time to explore new relationship styles and get to know new people (which my partner is totally cool with).

Constantly carrying a composition notebook.

My sexuality and gender presentation has proved to be fluid and transient. I believe in a spectrum of gender & sexualities and that everyone has the right to self determination over their own bodies (self determination also plays a role in my other political beliefs).

In short, I'm a gender-fluid queer person with female genitalia seeking other queer folks. What your genitalia looks like isn't important. While being a cis straight dude does not automatically make you a bad person, it does put you outside of what I'm looking for.

Romantically and long term, all I really want is someone who’s willing to constantly trade the roles of Robin Hood and riot grrl Marian with me. And to have the”merry men” actually be a group of our lovers and/or comrades (of all genders). Oh, and kink is in there somewhere.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm part of the Antiwar Committee Chicago; we're currently doing a campaign exposing Boeing's role in the drone wars as well as their role in the attacks on Gaza. I'm also part of students for a democratic society (SDS) (

Writing poetry. Reading books. Watching movies. Bending gender. Spending time with good people. Talking to people about political shit. Trying to have literary/theory discussions.

I have a job at a call center that books golf tee times. It pays my bills and gives me loads of anecdotes.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Laughing at stupid things I do and telling people about it later.

MCing/public speaking
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Nobody knows how the complete stranger views them, so it would be pointless to try to give you that perspective. People seem to like my hair.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
TV: Twin Peaks, Daria, Seinfeld, Arrested Development, Creature Comforts America, Mad Men, Big Love, Queer as Folk, Star Trek: The Next Generation, Star Trek: Deep Space 9.

Movie Criteria: Sexuality as a positive path to transformation, women on a journey of self-discovery, heavy thoughts we can discuss afterwards, dark, cynical, and/or sarcastic humor, pretty horror, period dramas, 90s LGBTQ, bougies behaving badly, and mindfuckers. If you enjoy listening to commentaries, we'll probably get along. Can we talk about Catherine Breillat?
Some Faves: Waking Life, Sans Soleil, Diary Of A Nymphomaniac, Fur, Heathers, Better Off Dead, Surviving Picasso, Synecdoche New York, Velvet Goldmine, Rain Without Thunder, I Heart Huckabees, Jeffrey, Relax It's Just Sex.

Music: I like cheese, bubble gum, shoe gazing, girls' shouts and/or whispers, queens, divas, beautiful queer boys, and my headphones. Lyrics are important though admittedly not everything. I hope Emily Haines is planning on doing more solo stuff. Placebo was great until they changed the lineup. One of my favorite shows was Parenthetical Girls and Perfume Genius.

Books: I go to Harold Washington Library at least a few times per week. Have had a long love affair with Milan Kundera. Some poets I like: Anne Carson, Rae Armantrout, Louise Glück, and Matthea Harvey. Kate Bornstein's "Gender Outlaw" changed my life. Think about the "Cyborg Manifesto" a lot.

Food: Not a fan of fried foods. I like fresh produce, tofu, beans, and eggs. Seafood is pretty good. Love curry and crab rangoons.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
The whole world needs food, shelter, beauty, water, and air. I'm assuming you want to know specifics to me.

* public library and public transportation

* alone time (no, really. i get super fussy when i don't have enough of this.)

* the feeling of working toward the kind of world I want

* writing materials

* discussions and people, but especially the good ones. communication is super important to me.

*pretty things
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
In any order: Education (learn). Dissection (cut it open). Deconstruction (tear it apart). Conversation (talk about it). Creative Application (put your imprint on it and use it). Repeat (do it again).

What I usually put through this process: sexuality, feminism, gender, activism/organizing, history, literature, writing, erotica, reading, language (visual, textual, verbal, body, etc.), resistance, revolution, and film.

*movement building.

*the myth of the american dream, colorblindness and other forms of institutionalized racism/classism.

*public education: what needs to be done in order to both ensure that its accessible and how can we make it better (how to increase the quantity of learners and the quality of learning).

*queer. everything.

*gynoids, androids, cyborgs, and how technology influences communication & relationships.

*How Disney and romantic movies fucked up everyone's relationship communication skills and streamlined romance into a capitalistic, untouchable, piece of crap based on avoidance and playing coy.

*what's masculine? what's feminine? how do we read gender?

*where can i find things/how can i do make-up to look more like Brian Slade?

On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Hanging out with friends, chilling at home, dreading work the next morning.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I like BDSM activities. A long term sexual relationship that does not have some level of BDSM is not healthy for me. But if we have a relationship that does not involve sexual contact (i.e. friends, asexual/platonic lovers, movie partners, etc.) then it doesn't matter too much to me where your sexual preferences lie.

I go by Kait but my birth certificate says Kaitlin. I like it that way, but will respond to either name (I went by Kaitlin from the ages of 6 to 19, so my old friends sometimes call me that). Just don't call me Katie.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
*You want to go to a Chicago protest/help me leaflet
*You can critique what you love
*You know that there's more than two (or even three) genders, sexual orientations (and orientations in general), sex positions, relationship statuses, etc.

*You can only think to say "hi" or "ur cute" or "what's up". If you can't explain what about my profile made you message me, then don't message me.
*You're more than 100 miles away. I'm sure you're great but it's hard enough for me to keep in touch with people within that radius.
* "I don't appreciate people who don't appreciate."-fiona apple