Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

KarlWelzein

39 M Grand Blanc, MI

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 28–50
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Jan 19, 2013
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 10″ (1.78m)
Body Type
Jacked
Diet
Mostly other
Smokes
Trying to quit
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Never
Religion
Sign
Libra
Education
Job
Rather not say
Income
Rather not say
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Pets
Speaks
English

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
President and CEO of Bad Boy City, USA

*NO FAKE BABES PLEASE. NOT TRYIN' TO HAVE NO IMAGINARY CARNAL PASSIONS LIKE THAT NOTRE DAME CORNCOB.*
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Currently just livin' the all freedom lifestyle and tryin' to rest my bod before possibly goin' into production for Roadhouse 2013: Pain Still Don't Hurt, starring my main man Guy Fieri and myself. (If contractual circumstances $$$ come into place.) It's gonna be so money. When you're constantly on the go, it's important to keep it chillin' in between projects so that your health is off the chain when it's time to get down to biz.

Of course, I still make time for plenty of 'shups so my pipes are swoll to perfection.

*AGAIN, NO FAKE BABES NEED APPLY.*
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
-Primo culinary expertise in the world of eateries as well as in your home where I'm no stranger to bold flavors. -Bein' ready for action if the heat gets hot and you need safety on the streets. -Sharin' a soft caress in private at your request. -Fine grooming skills; they're a very important part of my life, as well as is my scent that lets you know I'm always on point. -Power Moves from coast to coast, 24/7, 365, Open on Sundays.

*REAL BABES.*
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Probably my rockin' pony or 'rang. Not sure which one would be first. Pretty tough call. Both are so chillin', you guys.

*I AIN'T TRYIN' TO GET DOWN WITH NO FAKE BABES.*
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: Penthouse and Penthouse Forum where I still have some personal carnal literature pieces concerning a rendezvous with Brenda awaiting publication. Also, Timehouse, a guy mag for the modern gentleman who craves intelligent eroticism on the go or at work, where I'm the President and CEO.

Flicks: Roadhouse, Rambo, Rambo II, Major League, Bad Boys II, Cobra, Robocop, Van Halen 5150 Live Without A Net. There's too many more to name, really. I'm a movie buff from way back. Gotta love the classics. Also, Roadhouse 2013 (formerly 2012) of course.

Shows: Triple D, Tigers, Lions, Wings, ESPN programs featuring Erin Andrews and Rachel Nichols. Guess I don't get to pick what's on the tube much. Dave's always hoggin' it to watch some crap like Grey's Anatomy. Such a load. It's MY Vizio. Sick of this. Might need a guy to guy.

Music: Had my own private DJ business as well as a private radio station, WLZN, as part of Bad Boy City Entertainment where I was the CEO, and comin' atcha live as The Captain. Both are still ready to rock, but it's they're really not my main thing anymore due to new business opportunities I'm pursuing. Also, I had some promotional difficulties when my former co-worker, Ken, defaced one of my flyers. I was pretty steamed. But to be fair, I had carnal passions with his wife, so that kinda made us even. Guess Ken made it erotic, guy on guy, and she found out, so his Oo-La-La wife was achin' for a bad boy to come correct with mad swag.

Food: Just finished up a menu revamp for Guy's new NYC 'rant. Still waitin' to hear back if we're gonna hook up, tag team style, on that, or just Roadhouse 2013. Who knows?

*ONLY LOOKIN' FOR THE ONE ON ONE REAL FEEL. FAKE BABES PLEASE HIT THE BRICKS, YOU GUYS.*
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
1. 'Rang
2. Carnal Passions
3. Pony
4. Cold Ones
5. Babes
6. Chest Beefers (Wink. Ha! Sorry, just some guy humor. Tryin' to keep things loose and conversational.)

*7. NOT FAKE BABES.*
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
...you, if we hook up and our passions are dialed in.

*ALSO; REAL, ALL NATURAL BABES. NO MADE UP CRAP.*
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
...rockin' with the heat of a thousand suns. Or, might just be chillin' the most. Either way, if you're the babe on my arm? Man, it'll be a consensual one on one celebraish of adult possibilities.

*AND, CRAVIN' A HUMAN BABE THAT IS NOT JUST FOR COMPUTER PASSIONS.*
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm not proud to say it, but Dave has alot of problems in the john. Sometimes he wakes me up with his late night BMs. They're so loud and rank. Think he might have some digestive problems. Not me. My BMs are always on point.

*JUST TO BE CLEAR, NO FAKE BABES. IT'S NOT MY STYLE."
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want a one way ticket to Bad Boy City,USA, and lookin' for the President and CEO to give you private and consensual tour.

*...AND, IF YOU'RE A WALKIN' TALKIN' BABE THAT WANTS TO GET HOT & STEAMY IN A PERSONAL, ADULT, SITUAISH.*