Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Well step right up! behold the amazing! the wonderful! the
absolutely stunning and completely non-refundable...sales pitch of
the century, please date me because I'm desperate and I can't
believe I'm on a dating site. La la la la la *Daria theme
My name is KHRYSTINA, yeah I know, it's spelled
different. ENTP type, be ready to keep up.
I'd like to consider myself a laid back, reasonable, realist,
sarcastic, more like cynical, and witty type of
person but in all honesty I'm stubborn, bossy and demanding (within
I don't think chivalry is dead, but I don't expect to be handed
everything simply because I have a vagina.
Friends would be nice, Best Friends would be awesome.
I'm also not here to get into any weird poly amorous or
master-slave/pet thing you have going on, so please don't ask. I'll
find my own slave thank you very much. I'm no Vanilla.
To the Girls reading: Yes, I've been in a relationship with
a girl, a few in fact. So no, I don't say I'm bi just for fun or
because I'm part of the new fad of being possibly gay. I am a
purely full on half gay bisexual and I love eating muff as much as
the next lesbian, probably better at it too.
I think what I really hate about reading people's bio's is when
they say all this crap and you can tell they're trying to hard to
say that they're "different" "weird" "intellectual" a.k.a not a
hipster retard and then when you think "oh well, maybe if I message
them and say hey they won't be a total pretentious douche bag and
ignore you. I'm mean how hard is it to reply with a 'Hey'?" But
then they do ignore you and then you're just happy that you saved
yourself from meeting a pretentious douche with a giant
dick up their ass.
I hope by saying this it's makes me more personable and inspires
more people to message me with confidence that I WILL
RESPOND. I haven't been online in a year or so, so I
apologize for all of those who sent a message and didn't receive a
response, most of them were old and/or not active accounts anymore,
REALLY original questions still got responses though, even if it
was like 5 months later. I can't guarantee that we will be
super amazing together but I can guarantee some interesting
I like to be bare footed and I have an obsession with
frogs. IF YOU DON'T SHARE MY LOVE FOR THE MUPPETS THEN IT WILL
You're standing on my neck.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I originally hail from El Monte, I moved to
Spain with my mother and sister when I was 8, then
moved to Santa Clarita for high school. When I
graduated I went into film school and was quickly expelled. I
changed majors, moved to Illinois but that too was short lived. So,
I just moved to Gilbert after bouncing around for a while, now I'm
in Tempe just recently out of a super serious relationship, long
story short, I need to get out more.I'm just dying to meet
I'm going to school, major is Massage Therapy, specializing in
energy work such as Shiatsu, acupressure, cranial sacral and
I hope to own a funeral home in the future and be a licensed
Mortician as well and then be able to incorporate energy work into
that. Feel free to let that stew.
I work from home part time.
I've started playing Warhammer 40k, I have two armies: Chaos
Daemons and Salamanders.
Occasionally smoking pakalolo.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Being Pretty and nothing else.
Breathing, blinking, looking, watching, typing, writing, reading,
observing, thinking, daydreaming, driving, acting, baking,
cleaning, snickering, laughing, poking, texting, ignoring, yelling,
cracking and jerking, licking, kissing, sucking reeses
peanut butter cups.
Making people laugh, being silly, making puns, talking to
strangers, picking things up with my toes, playing Skyrim.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My little feet.
My fertile birthing hips.
40" 33" 47", 160 lbs of amazing
My direct blunt attitude.
"How come you don't have better pictures on your profile
Khrystina?" Because Fuck You, that's why.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Boooks: Erotic Adventures of Sleeping Beauty, Harry Potter,
Metamorphosis, Stiff, Song of Kali.
Movies: Back To The Future, horror movies.
Music: mostly classic rock (60s-80s), some hip hop, stoner music,
90s pop, techno, "derpstep", contemporary club music, sambas,
cumbias, merengues aka spanish dance music that you hear at your
neighbors house like every weekend until 3am. oooh yeah.
Spread the PLAGUE! <3
Shows: Xfiles and Daria
Food: Anything Asian.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
air, food, water, clothing, internet, friends.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
It really grinds my gears when people describe themselves as a
"walking contradiction". You're an idiot, If you were a real
contradictionist you'd be just standing.
I envy the musically inclined for it must be so nice to be able to
express yourself through a medium other than punching the
What would I do if I really did take an arrow to the knee.
What really happened to Angelea on ANTM's last season.
How I couldn't remember how to throw a boomerang, but it all came
back to me.
Stealing someone's coffee is called "mugging".
Novice pirates make terrible singers because they can't hit the
How Although Nobelists tend to have dynamite personalities, Niels
was a Bohr, and Linus was a Pauling.
That I really do have a photographic memory -- I just haven't
developed it yet.
If you don't pay your exorcist, you get repossessed.
And It's better to love a short girl than not a
Boom boom tst!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Currently watching Toriko on Hulu.
I play 360 most weekends now, I'm currently mostly playing RPGs
like Skyrim and Dark Souls, I'm also playing Shadows of the
Feel free to add me on Xbox Live if you like: Tinadafroggy
Also, somehow every week, when I plan all these hang outs with
people, I get busy every day of the week except for Friday.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Someone has told me recently that I look like Sunny
I have a mental list of people that I think should drop
I have a giant stuffed frog named Radish.
I have an IMVU account with the same SN as here.
I have a tattoo on both of my ankles.
I have a thing for intelligence. Like intelligence that you apply
every day, good reasoning skills, a myriad of random facts and not
be a sensitive sperglord are just a few things that could
definitely help you on this mission, should you choose to accept
Super intense eyes = googolplex of internets for you.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
***************You want to come over with weed and pizza and watch
all kinds of weird shows with me. *****************
You have a properly functioning brain stem that allows more complex
thoughts than what you're going to upload to *Add favorite social
networking site here* next.
you're bored and you wanna talk.
if you wanna hang out, I'm always dying to get out of the
My exbf decided it would be a good idea to drive my car into a
FedEx truck so I don't have a car at the moment, if that is an
issue for you, keep walking.
Don't message me if you're illiterate or fail at writing. I
am a grammar Nazi and if you message me with poor grammar and/or
spelling or abusing abbreviations, I will warn you about it, but
after your first offense, I will ignore you. I'm being deadly
Don't message me if you're creepy and/or older than my age limit or
plan to stalk and/or murder and/or rape me.
Please READ my profile, it took me all of 30 minutes to
type and it's worth it for your own safety. You have been
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