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34 Akron, OH Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–45
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Full figured
Mostly anything
Not at all
Other, and laughing about it
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Has kids
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I can never keep these profile essays short and to the point. I'm a big communicator ( my way of say that I talk too damn much), which is reflected in anything that I write about myself. I'll try to keep this one under an hour long read. Where do I begin? I'm 33 single (by choice), never married with two beautiful, but unemployed daughters, ages 14 and 4. I'm not here in the pursuit of love and the like, so if I contact you, please understand that I'm not actively looking for specifically that. I'd like to meet someone with the potential to cure me of my commitaphobia'ness, but I'm not going to beat my head against the proverbial wall in attempts to find her. With that being said, I would like to meet someone that I can talk with and get to know, outside of that I try to refrain from expectations and agendas.

I want this profile to be an honest and 1,000% accurate portrayal of who I am and to truthfully express what it is that I want. The whole "gettingtoknowya" process can be much like a job interview. We've all been there, met a potential "employee" that says and does all of the right things initially, but when their truisms come to light you realize that you've been hoodwinked and bamboozled (said in my Denzel Washington as Malcolm X voice). I never want to do that, by that I mean to swindle someone into liking me. I want to be liked and accepted, but it's important, no it's essential to me that I be liked for who I am and what I can offer. I don't believe in selling myself or misrepresenting my intentions just to win someone over, or to be blunt to get some from you. I could type on for hours telling you about how honest and genuine I am, but that would be a waste of time for me to do and you to read. If you're interested in knowing more about me...if for no other reason say hello and have a few laughs with me or at my expense. I can show you much better than I can tell you who I am.

I kept it under an hour! I'm damn proud of myself :)
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Besides spending a beautiful Sunday afternoon on this devil box filling out this ultra involved profile? I'm trying to be the best father to my girls (I have two crumb snatching tax deductions). I want to be the same type of provider, character and discipline builder to my daughters that my parents were to me.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Writing out long winded, kick ass self essays on free dating websites.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My chocolate'ish, moderately decent looks and chubby boy charm.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Favorite books....ones that I can use to get the attention of the smarty, artsy, prescription eyeglass wearers at the local Caribou Coffee. The right book can make even the biggest moron look studious.

Favorite movies....Anything not associated with that spawn of Satan Tyler Perry! I know that I'm going to lose points with some (because all black women love his god awful, terribly predictable coon flicks), but I'd rather shoot myself than watch another one of his movies or shows. So no we can't get Madea goes to community college from the Red Box on our first date.

Favorite shows...Martin, The Wire, The First 48, Snapped, 48 Hours on ID. I'm a huge fan of true crime documentary series, so my TV stays on ID, Tru TV, and A&E. I also love the HBO series Boardwalk Empire, it's maybe the best show since The Wire. I loved the Boondocks and Curb Your Enthusiasm as well.

Favorite musics...Yes, I said musics. I'm a huge, huge music buff, so I have too many favorite artists and genres to list. I listen to and own a little bit of everything from classic rock, to old school jheri curl era soul music, to country, to the most gully west coast gangsta rap music from the mid 90's.

Favorite foods...I'm an overall fan of good ol' "make you fat and sleepy" American heart attack specials. I really don't do anything exotic. I'm a regular Joe when it comes to food consumption, so a tasty Big Kahuna burger and Sprite works just fine for me.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My iPod, my family (sans my worthless older brother), my sweater vest and ties, my love of music and sports, my Snapple raspberry iced tea packets, and my once mighty, now mediocre Miami Hurricanes....We're coming back!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I spend a lot of time thinking about work...My decision to make a career change from something that I did and knew very well to something that I have zero experience in and to be quite honest that I'm not very good or proficient at. I think that I made the right decision and ultimately I'll have a successful career, but I'd be lying if I said that I didn't think about work and what my future holds.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
If I'm not at work, I'm probably at home getting down on random homebody activities such as "stealing" music for my iPod. My inner cheapskate won't permit me to pay for music on iTunes. During the fall I'm usually at high school football games on Friday nights. There's nothing better to me than early autumn weather, cheap concession stand nachos and hot dogs, and the collection of mini van owning milf types in the bleachers at Polk High football games.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm only here to convert you....Yes you, into a chubby chaser!
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you like chocolate (yes, that is an innuenda). You should message me if guys that dress like Carlton Banks turn you on. If you prefer buddha bellies to six pack abs you message me. If you can recognize and appreciate the humor and smartcasticness of the content of this "sales pitch" you should definitely message.