LEEZE'S PROFILE™ - NOW WITH ALL-NEW PROOF-READING! (batteries not included. Also, some assembly is required... that's my justification for why all the thoughts seem so disconnected. lol)

It's been a while since I've been on okcupid... I just managed to chew through my restraints and earn my bachelor degree (its a little known fact that the final requirement for a degree is to escape before the student loan officers catch you). Anyway, I wanted to show my more realistic, serious side... so I talked about squirrel armies.. lol *sigh* I wish I had more time. RAAAAAWWWR! SOMEONE KEEPS STEALING ALL MY TIME!!! I'm currently thoroughly investigating this time shortage and possible time theft although its proving more time consuming than hoped... and the results all point to the investigation. :P lol

I love oil and watercolor painting, drawing, and making things, like Native American beadwork and pow wow regalia. I like to put things on my head. I like popsicles, hugs, old/vintage things, and shiny things. If you haven't yet felt provoked to push the back button off my profile, then I think you should know, my profile has been shown to cause cancer in the state of California! The other 49 states are fine I think... :P

Actually, I can be pretty well-behaved sometimes. I just have a love for life that spans beyond sanity. I make it my duty to try to get everyone to smile... even if it makes them blush as well. ;) hahaha

Lately I've been a lot more shy because I traded my social skills for all the scientific knowledge in the universe... I then later traded that for breakfast cereal. I thought it was a fair deal at the time... later, I realized how important it is to sleep every once in a while before making life decisions. And that pretty much sums up my senior year of College.

Anyway, I really just need someone to hang out with to break the cycle of hiding in my cave-like apartment doing smeagol voices... since its very unbecoming of me. Then again, maybe you're turned-on by that? Oh goodness, I hope not. lol

Now that I've finished my bachelors degree in Horticulture Science (which is supposedly Horticulture for smart people), I've been working laboratory positions and except for the occasion attack by mutagenic flies that get into the bioharazardous trash, its fairly uneventful. I pretty much play with plant viruses all day. They've accepted me as one of their own and now I tend to attach myself to people and replicate inside them... kinky. I guess you could say my personaility is infectious. :P

I never seem to have alot of time in my current life and I feel bad for neglecting my okcupid account. It writes me bitter love-notes complaining of its neglect.... it thinks we had something special. Psshhht, it was just another account I was using to get to other men. Oh wait, that's its job... nevermind.

I'm looking to go to grad school after I get more practical experience... and I'm seriously considering going overseas... or maybe underseas because Disney movies told life was better undersea and Disney movies have never lied to me before. *Sings and woodland critters gather at her feet* Yup, that's totally normal. Anyway, I've had dreams of becoming a mermaid since I was 5 years old. lol

Other than that, I spent my weekends on the pow wow trail dancing Women's Jingle style or being artsy fartsy with the world's largest stockpile of art supplies that I've acquired...I guess got tired of buying unimportant things like food.

In summary, however, I really don't have a life... and I always get outbid for the lives they sell on eBay. grrr I get auction rage!!! YOU !@#$% JERK, STOP OUTBIDDING ME!!! I'M GOING TO SEND YOU STRONGLY WORDED EMAIL IN ALL CAPS! HA!!!

...making a fool of myself. ;) I never say the right things at the right times, with the correct grammar, or in the appropriate language. Sometimes, I don't say anything at all... I just stare blankly at anything shiny or moving and hope to god you'll mistake me for a tree, get bored, and leave... unless of course you frequently converse with trees. That's okay too.

I guess I'm pretty good at artistic things too. Judge for yourself: http://themachete.deviantart.com

1.) My squirrel armies. Its not that I'm in love with squirrels, we just have similar interests such as: a.) trees & b.) hibernation

2.) My crazy clothes. It's not like I try to dress weird, its just that everyone else is dressing the same. :P I like to dress more formal than most and with many accessories. These accessories are actually ninja gear disguised to look fashionable. See, my underpants are actually a crossbow. Fashion isn't a big deal for me... but its really more of my artistic mind trying to paint pictures all over my body. :P My psychologist friends say its me trying to avoid people by scaring them off with COLOR!!! lol Yea, I'd say that's pretty accurate. hehe

books: "How to Read A Book"... its a really easy read... lol, cheezy fantasy books, reflective and thoughtful novels, science books (what? I have to maintain my semi-nerdy status). My favorite author is David Fairchild, the famous plant explorer and his autobiography "The World Was My Garden: Travels of a Plant Explorer," is probably my favorite book. Although it might be my favorite just because its the best book of the five books I've had time to read in my lifetime... lol

movies: indie/independent films, animated movies, miyazaki films, old films, musicals, lots and lots of crazy comedy, romance, Pride and Prejudice, Happy Accidents, etc. I'll watch just about anything!

music: I enjoy classical more than I should for my age... lol. I'm partial to folk/singer-songwriter music, Native American stuffs (everything from Jim Boyd to Northern Cree) and ambient/trance/relaxing music. I also have a strange desire to pipette wildly to Indian Bhangra in the lab (and I hope I'll eventually get all the ejected pipette tips out of the ceiling tiles). I pretty much travel the musical world on delicast.com. So far I've listened to most of Europe and parts of Asia. I will put my foot down though when it comes to some pop music... oh yes, I'll put my foot down right on the cd or radio! :P I also have this really awesome cd where this lady yodels like a cow... cows have other purposes beyond eating, you know! Why, I knew a Guernsey how could sing a high A above C! An important note, I will not forcibly subject anyone to my musical stylings... or singing cows.

foods: I drink like a fish... and by drink I mean green tea, vitamin water and fruit juice smoothies... and by fish I mean I tend to follow your finger when you move it along the aquarium glass. I <3 ethnic food and would like to someday destroy Anthony Bourdain's marriage in order to travel the world as his culinary mistress... food porn! In recent years I've become obsessively healthy and I actually grow my own fruits and veggies and bake my bread from scratch (I <3 tsu ya ga du!)... I don't trust bread that comes from a plastic bag and doesn't ever seem to mold... if microbes won't eat it, then neither will I. Although, most microbes are saprophytes... perhaps microbes are not the best dietary role models. I also love breakfast cereal so much that if I were ever made of breakfast cereal, I would surely cannabilize myself. Also, popscicles... I already said that didn't I? In addition, I <3 grapes, celery, carrots, baby spinach, blood oranges, snow peas, beans, apples, potatoes, sweet potatoes, blueberries, cantaloupe, other round fruity things, green planty things and also not-so-green subterrainean planty things. I have officially listed everything that is in my kitchen/garden. lol

google, good friends and unsuspecting strangers, art, music, dreams, the outdoors

...that drawing I should be working on instead of updating this, people and how I probably should stop thinking about them and actually talk to them instead lol, how little time there is *sigh*, how I'll probably never finish my beadwork, the beauty of things, painting, sleep, how I used to write poetry and songs, forgotten dreams (like that time I wanted to write a musical about pants lol),random strangers I see, my on-going daydreams (Oh John Basedow, my awesome imaginary husband!!! lol), all the art/craft projects I want to start/work on

... waking up. lol My sleep schedule is a little backwards.

But most likely, I'm probably just daydreaming and working on art/craft/beadwork projects, exercising, talking to close friends, or waiting for adventure!

I made my 5th grade substitute teacher cry... it bothers me to this day.
I think I may have made my 12th grade English teacher cry but that doesn't bother me so much
I really wish I could have made my Spanish teacher cry. She made me cry. And she took away all my pesos!!!

My first and only exclusive boyfriend ever... was on the internet. He lived 1400 miles away and actually proposed to me several times... I decided to marry school instead. Don't get any ideas from that, you crazies. :P

I've never actually kissed a guy... I tend to end up dating people afraid of physical contact... and the light. *hisses and cowers in the shadows* But for once, I'd like to have a mature relationship that involves someone who can handle the commitment of slobbering on my face... lmao

... if you want to have the strangest or most awkward conversation of your life... and make a lonely, overworked lab rat smile ;) (and possibly help her procrastinate). Actually this form of procrastination works both ways, so if you need to procrastinate... by all means then! lol

Actually... if you like challenges. I tend to avoid everything very thoroughly being that I am pathologically shy and extremely committed to my goal of procrastination... but don't worry, when you finally catch me, you get candy! I'm totally like Lucky the Leprechaun... YAY LUCKY CHARM MARSHMALLOWS!!!