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29 Pittsburgh, PA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Online now!
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body type
Mostly anything
Trying to quit
Other, and laughing about it
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
-Introvert learning how to socialize better.
-Skeptical but open-minded.
-Amateur Comedian with no chance of success.
-Board game designer with big dreams.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Day job: God of Hoagies. Sounds pretentious, I know, but if the guys at Subway get to call themselves artists, then I need a proportionately accurate term. They assemble pieces, I make the sandwich from scratch. I work with a blank canvas, they paint by number.

Outside of work, I do stand up comedy and design board games. I'm more passionate about these things, so I'd rather talk about them in person instead of trying to reduce them to a quick summary.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Making up games. Seriously, give me a spool of dental floss a pitbull, and some kerosene and I'll come up with a way for us to have hours of entertainment. The pitbull will not be harmed, just to be clear.

I'm also pretty good at math and useless trivia.

And I recently invented a new way to whistle, which is handy since I couldn't whistle before.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Authors/Books: Robert Anton Wilson, Hunter S Thompson, Douglas Adams, Orson Scott Card, Kurt Vonnegut, Isaac Asimov, HP Lovecraft, Brandon Sanderson, and Franz Kafka; The Wheel of Time series, His Dark Materials trilogy, A Song of Ice and Fire, Principia Discordia, A Prayer for Owen Meany, House of Leaves, and several graphic novels. Big fan of sci-fi and high fantasy, but I'll read anything that makes me think.

Directors/Movies: David Lynch, Judd Apatow, Matt Stone & Trey Parker, Hiyao Miyazaki, Joss Whedon, Richard Ayaode, and Wes Anderson; Tommy Boy, Phil the Alien, Six-string Samurai, Role Models, Zombieland, Scott Pilgrim vs. the World, Equilibrium, Dark City, Dr. Horrible's Sing-along Blog, The Man from Earth, Synechdoche NY, Kick-Ass, and Seven Pounds. I like movies.

TV: Arrested Development, Lost, It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia, The Office, Weeds, Breaking Bad, Cowboy Bebop, Firefly, Flight of the Conchords, Modern Family, The IT Crowd, Louie, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles(original series and current), Death Note, Darker Than Black, Speed Grapher, Bleach, Dragonball Z, and Titus. I also like TV.

Music: Blind Melon, System of a Down, Serj Tankian, Weezer, Cake, The Mountain Goats, Flobots, Pearl Jam, Flight of the Conchords, Stephen Lynch, Tenacious D, and The Lonely Island. Not a big music person, I'm more of a visual guy. Listening to music, I either ignore everything else around me, or ignore the music. I have trouble finding a middle ground.

Food: My favorite is almost any pasta dish with tomato sauce. However, I'm a terrible cook, so anything homemade is delicious to me. It's easier to name the things I don't like, including mushrooms, olives, peppers, pineapple, liver, cole slaw, and sauer kraut.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Truth, lies, white lies, black lies, True Lies on DVD, and my epidermis.

Seriously though, I'm a minimalist. I could lose everything and I'd be fine. As long as I still have my ideas.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Politics, philosophy, art, math, science, the future, new stand up routines, my games, and what I will sing at karaoke on Tuesday.

Also jokes that are only funny because they are so bad. And jokes that are only funny to me. And un-jokes.

Also, the Fermi paradox.

Also, why women say they enjoy intelligent conversation and then don't respond when I ask them about the Fermi Paradox.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Not much. I recently decided to take a break from stand up comedy so my social life has taken a nose-dive. I really need to remedy that before I become a loser.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I use laughter to get through difficult situations. Some people think I'm insensitive, but it's a coping mechanism that works for me.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're good company. You enjoy board games, comedy, and/or karaoke. You're pro-cannabis. All of these are acceptable reasons.

Also, feel free to just say hi. I'm a bit of an introvert when it comes to new people. I'm terrible at starting conversations, but excellent at making them meaningful.