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29 Raleigh, NC Man


I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 18–36
  • Near me
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
Today – 2:12am
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body type
A little extra
Strictly anything
Atheism, and laughing about it
Graduated from university
Rather not say
Seeing Someone
Mostly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Has dogs and dislikes cats

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
The vast majority of people on this site seem to be either telling constant fairy tales to themselves about how much skydaddy loves them while spouting off ironic nonsense, trapped a few steps behind the rest of us on the evolutionary tree, or are whiny social justice nut jobs with a victim complex the size of Jupiter and a sense of personal identity that looks like someone threw a dozen schizophrenics with MPD in a blender and hit "frappe."

So my choices are: "Muh name is Jenn and I like The Bibble and shopping with muh friends while we listen to muzak. Don't judge me, only god can. I like sucking dick, but you better has money if you want this [morbidly obese] body! I like drinking, but only PBR. I watch a lot of TV. I read a lot too, mostly the Bibble and Cosmo. I think gay people are gross and deserve hellfire, but I really love everyone. As long as they ain't gay. I want 13 kids one day. I ain't interested unless you love Jebus and want the be married in a church. Also, I might go bak to school soon to learn me a career. I think I could make it big in the hair braiding industry, but that takes three whole months of schooling and I'm not sure I can pass the entry tests. They better not try and teach me science. The only science I need is in the Bibble. I'll pray on it until God gives me a sign or sends me a man instead. PS: EVILution is a lie and god bless 'murika and the Bush family line!"

Or: "My gender identity is helicoptermayonnaise, and I demand to be called by singular collective Jewish pronouns. Check your goyim privilege, you shitlord schmucks. Every man is a rapist in waiting and I hit them in the face whenever they say anything that I don't like because EQUALITY, but if they ever even raise their voice to me, I'll tell everyone they raped me. Just because you aren't touching me doesn't mean it's not rape. Also, I'm a veganwiccantribalanarchorabbitsoulneopagan and if you can't accept that then you're part of the patriarchy and need to go die in a cave somewhere. My feelings are equal to facts! And the state should be run to protect my feelings, even if that means no one has any freedom of speech. Guns murder people because they make people do it when they wouldn't otherwise and should be outlawed by using armed police to take them all because then we will have total peace since criminals will lay down their arms once their victims are unarmed! PLUR! Obama is the best president we've ever had. I voted for him because he's black because if I didn't I would be a racist for not voting based on race. Next time, I'm voting for Hilary, since anyone who doesn't vote for her because she's a wyman is just sexist for voting not based on sex. PS: all sciences are sexist lies made up by the patriarchy except sociology."
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Live. Laugh. Love. Learn. Die anyway.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Maintaining homeostasis in varying temperatures.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Whatever is nonsuck.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Knives that open one-handed, dogs, land that's mine, nicotine, sex of some sort, my freedom to say things that offend people.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Ennui resulting from being biologically hardwired to seek meaning in a universe without any. Also, what faces people I see in public make during orgasm.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Shaking my cane at the kids these days, walking on my lawn with their hippity-hop crunchy dubz while injecting the marijuanas.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you get this joke:
Two chemists walk into a bar. The first says, "I'll have an H2O." The second says, "I'll have an H2... Wait, you know what, we've been at work all day, there's no reason you have to be pretentious and order water by stating it's chemical formula. Bartender, give me a water." The first chemist grimaces, because his assassination plot had failed.