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41 Knoxville, TN Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 26–44
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
May 1
6′ 1″ (1.85m)
Body type
Mostly anything
Other, and laughing about it
Aries, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from university
Science / Engineering
Doesn’t have kids, but wants them
Has cats
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Looking for a reason to spend less time on my motorcycle, perhaps, maybe. I'm looking for someone who is not going to jam me up. I go to the gym 6 days a week after work. I'm working on home projects in the meanwhile and tending to my cats.

Making America great!

That guy in the Notebook...yeah.

If you don't have a sense of humor we won't get along.

If you need rescuing and don't have your shit together we won't get along.
If you come at me sideways poo pooing the patriachial hierarchy of the history of the world in one breath and demand I recycle in the next we won't get along. No one can save the world by collecting ideas from a walnut farm.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Teaching Gorillas how to ride unicycles.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
getting the shopping cart with the one wheel that won't spin properly at the Walmart.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Star (WARS)
Don't Quixote
The Flaming lips
I've been on a Tamale kick recently.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Cat anger
Cat love
Cat litter
Cat Food
Cat Nip
Cat Toys
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
that damn doll in the movie The Conjuring! I can't get it out of my mind!

Why I get tired of making my own sandwiches so quickly. If things get domestic and you can't season a chicken I'm calling your mom. I'm willing to make you snacks 50/50 before you getall defensive with that feminist vibe.

Why I'm still a 99% match with a woman named assfacethecat on this site. I mean I have answered a few questions but I have also had elementary statistics. I swear it is the dismal tide.

Why Mormons believe the magic happens with the magic underwear still on.

Why I had to cuss out a homeless woman to keep her from assaulting me with a baloney sandwich after I told her I had no change and only a debit card.

Why anyone would dare to put 'baby in the corner.'

Why women have such a problem facing the prospect of dating a man with only one nightstand. FYI: I have TWO nightstands ladies, I appreciate symmetry too I guess. No more one night stands with this guy. If you need a place to rest your stuff upon or your books. I have TWO NIGHTSTANDS! So NO MORE ONE NIGHTSTANDS! I will take you to IKEA if you need to see all the nightstands.

Why women put in their profiles 'I will never settle for less than I deserve.' That certainly establishes a benchmark to reference but it is also ambiguous. For instance, don't EVER touch my french fries. If I share them with you, then at that moment, you will know where you truly stand in the reciprocity department. FYI: if I share Bacon with you you should expect a ring to arrive shortly afterwards.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
smelling the color 9
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you wont pinch me, I hate to be pinched.
you like holding hands in graveyards because it can be scary
You don't hang out in graveyards and find that scary
You're chasing that neon rainbow, living that honky-tonk dream (its just an expression, I'm not a fan of country music) but can put on a pair of heels and charm a room
You smell nice and groom often
You must love cats! I don't care if you 'like dogs' but you must love cats
You received high marks for plays well with others in your formative years of schooling
You're a nun who is on the run from a murderous doomsday cult and the shit just got real
You're a murderous doomsday cult member and have found an alien body dressed as a nun
You have never taken a class on twerking
You don't chew ice or with your mouth open because that causes my ears discomfort
You have some means of supporting yourself other than waiting on scripts from CVS pharmacy
You have never collected beanie babies in a meaningful way
You don't sleep with your dog
You have never killed someone
No one has ever killed you
You have all your fingers and toes and can count them to twenty
You have never had sex in front of a live audience of more than 10,000 people
You know how to spell like the longest word in the dictionary and you know what word that is and can beat anyone at scrabble
You are willing to steal monopoly money to win
You've never received a camel cash dollar instead of real currency while dancing naked to ted nugent's cat scratch fever
You don't have a husband
You aren't evil in the literal and classic sense
You've never killed anybody
You look at the appendages of gummy bears before you eat them and wonder if it can feel
You have ever won a nobel prize
You want to move to Paris because you keep dreaming about croissants
You wonder if Forrest Gump's kid could run as fast as Forest gump
You have never considered using a semi truck as way to let off some steam toward those who have made you mad

*eventually clothes will come off or they wont, maybe there will be dinner,maybe not, maybe you'll abandon the date, jump in your car and then run straight on into an oncoming train full of gummy bears so you don't really die or anything scary like that or maybe you'll try to beat me at a staring contest and you'll lose because I find you the most beautiful woman I have ever seen!

Definitely message me if everything looks like a giant cupcake to you too.

P.S. please don't pee in front of me on the first date. This happened twice.

P.S.S.S- BE honest. I've had more than one existential revelation in my life and have watched the sun rise and set on opposite sides of the world, have run headlong into the dark to pull others to the light, I have seen how far down the rabbit hole goes and caught glimpses behind 'the veil' and am cosmically connected and attuned, and yet still not a mystic or an ordained minister. Life is a mysterious unfolding which i love. I hope you love yours too. I hope youre in a good place as well. Im not in the 'fixing others' business anymore but if you get my attention and I like you and youre nice to me and i think youll be an outstanding positive influence in my life to share this crazy adventure with **and you're in a good place** if i just so happen to fall in love with you then I will spend my life building altars and temples and starting new religions in your name. It will probably be in Don Quixote kinda way but at least chivalry won't be dead. Right? Right.