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MF2287

26 M New York, NY

My Details

Last Online
Today – 7:45pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Athletic
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Socially
Drugs
Religion
Judaism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Libra
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Likes dogs
Speaks
English

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My self-summary
Canadian from Toronto who just finished grad school at Columbia University for creative writing. One of my professors said the best compliment he could give me is that I am, "a buffoon with occasional insights into the human condition."

Things I really like: narrative non-fiction, 80s cop movies, guacamole, jazz music, amateur wrestling, the delicious burned part of food (that apparently gives you cancer?), long social realist novels, standup comedy, guacamole, paying way too much attention to the NBA, junk food with candy inside of it already.

I try to only do things that are really important or really fun. And yes, I'm produced by Pharrell.
What I’m doing with my life
Writing and working in NY (in other words, my LSAT score is good for a few more years, so given the odds of writing success, I'm really just getting prepped for law school :) )
I’m really good at
going to the gym, quoting The Sopranos, making little kids on the subway laugh by blowing bubblegum bubbles and then looking innocuously at their parents, drawing connections between literary fiction and Lindsey Lohan's arrest record, creatively combining Sour Patch Kids flavors to entertain myself during movies, ranking flavors of Ben and Jerry's ice cream I haven't eaten, eating Ben and Jerry's ice cream.

Also, I wrestled in college and I throw a pretty nasty suplex, but that's a 5th date demonstration - if you're lucky.
The first things people usually notice about me
I look a lot like Tim Tebow.
Or that I was the assistant captain of your college lacrosse team.
Or like I was in the military.
Or Conservative Christian TV personality Pat Robertson.
In short, I look like the opposite of the goofy, sarcastic, Canadian Jewish guy I am on the inside.
Also, I wear a lot of v-neck sweaters, which I've been assured via market research is a value-neutral choice: friendly to democrats/republicans, men/women, able/handicapped --basically anyone without a serious upper chest hair problem.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books:
Infinite Jest, The Corrections, Sabbath's Theater, Lolita, Invisible Man, American Pastoral, The Great Gatsby, Lush Life, The Power Broker, Moneyball, A Visit From The Goon Squad, Anna Karenina, A Supposedly Fun Thing I'll Never Do Again, The Journalist and The Murderer, Super Sad True Love Story, Middlemarch, A Confederacy of Dunces, Disgrace, Revolutionary Road, Wind Up Bird Chronicle, Remains of The Day, Housekeeping, Jesus' Son, As I Lay Dying, The Group, Pulphead, Brothers Karamazov, The House of Mirth, Bleak House, Native Son, Go Tell It On The Mountain, Beloved, Bonfire of the Vanities, Crime and Punishment. And some George Saunders and Alice Munro (who just won the Nobel Prize!! Yay Canada!)

Recently: Gone Girl, The Flamethrowers, The Unwinding, The Interestings, The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P., The Goldfinch, The Divide, California, Fourth of July Creek were all great.

Also a big magazine guy: The New Yorker, Harper's, New York, GQ, Sports Illustrated, ESPN, Vanity Fair, Esquire.

TV Shows: The Sopranos, The Wire, Curb Your Enthusiasm, Breaking Bad, Deadwood, Seinfeld, Arrested Development, Parks and Rec, Louie, 30 Rock, Community, The Office, Mad Men, Game of Thrones, Girls, Frasier, Orange is The New Black
Recently: The Good Wife, Top of The Lake, Veep, True Detective, House of Cards, The Americans, Silicon Valley, Fargo, Borgen

Movies: Memento, Goodfellas, Do The Right Thing, The Lives of Others, Superbad, Annie Hall, The Godfather I and II, Taxi Driver, Fargo, Big Lebowski, Crimes and Misdemeanors, Anchorman, Network, Manhattan, Raging Bull. And anything Nicole Holofcener.
Recently: Chef, Neighbors, 22 Jump Street, Snowpiercer, Boyhood, Dawn of Planet of The Apes

Music: John Coltrane, Miles Davis, Jay-Z, Steely Dan, Kanye West, Outkast, Phoenix, Celia Cruz, Gustav Mahler, Marvin Gaye, Herbie Hancock, Counting Crows, Drake, Stevie Wonder, Mayer Hawthorne, Bruce Springsteen, Common, Charles Mingus, Arcade Fire, The National, Frank Ocean, Brad Mehldau, Joshua Redman
Recently: Childish Gambino, SFJAZZ Collective, Beyonce, Pharrell, The Hold Steady, The Roots

Food: i eat a lot of meat and dessert--and will pay top dollar to discover creative ways of combining the two. I'm currently working on a business model for Ben n' Jerky's, a high protein handheld method for getting all the deliciousness of ice cream with all the factory-sealed convenience of beef jerky.
The six things I could never do without
cake icing, water, tabasco sauce, heat, shelter, additional cake icing to replace the cake icing I ate as you read this.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
How many "a few tips for your online dating profile" draft emails my wonderfully Jewish mother has saved in her outlook express, in case I ever mention to her that I'm on this site.
(BTW, it's at least 10, plus some cute photos of me as a kid to include for good measure. And a recipe for matzah ball soup. UPDATE: For Valentine's Day, I sent her a dozen tulips. She sent me a 3 page email (factum, really!) describing how I should hold out hope that some day a "fabulous woman will fall head over heels for me.")
On a typical Friday night I am
Photoshopping myself and Mayor of Toronto/personal hero Rob Ford into pictures of crackdens/petting zoos. In my imagination, he always brings guacamole, which goes well with crack and/or baby llamas.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I can't ride a bike. I blame the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers/ dysfunctional parents. Detailed explanation to follow.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 19–30
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
you hate BOTH terrorism and overpriced baked goods.
A rare kind of integrity in a world of declining moral standards.

Or if you have a good sense of humor, and like nice guys who are surprisingly clumsy.