Machete_Western
28 Austin, TX
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
Machete_Western
Join today
Find great matches with our advanced matching system!
My self-summary
I will to turn your brains into wulfpussy.
What I’m doing with my life
I'm a televangelist from outer-space. I'm a time traveling sex demon. I keep myself pretty busy.
I’m really good at
stealing your horse, setting your wife on fire.
The first things people usually notice about me
opposable genitals
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Zardoz
John Waters
Alejandro Jodorowsky
David Lynch

The Cramps
King Gizzard and the Lizzard Wizard
The Shangri-las
Hunx and His Punx
Shannon and the Clams
The Growlers
King Kahn and BBQ show
The six things I could never do without
Turquoise jewelry
Cocaine
Bob Ross
Spring reverb
Fun shaped novelty strap-ons
Anal tongue punching
I spend a lot of time thinking about
goblins.
On a typical Friday night I am
Dipping my fists in glue, and then into a barrel of angry possums. Then I go fist fight packs of stray dogs with my possum fists.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
polyester gets me rock hard.
You should message me if
You wear a lot of black clothing
You're a cheeky oblong goblin
More