�but he�s gone. Not only as our PM, but I�d say he has lost his local seat, too. The counting for Bennelong went down to the wire (although the swing to Labor was massive) but I think the postal votes will just confirm what we already know: that not only is John Howard gone from federal parliament but he is gone from the entire political scene for good.

In what can only have been the influence of the rum I was drinking at the time, I got a little sad when Howard conceded his loss. Although I have very rarely agreed with the man and his policies in his decade of dominance, he gave a very dignified farewell speech. He thanked the people for playing their role in democracy, that he accepted what they had to say, that he took full responsibility for his party�s loss and that Australia is the best nation in the world, and her people are the very best people in the world.

The final results were devastating to the Coalition. Not only did Labor pick up the 16 extra seats they needed to win parliament, but, after final counts, they will also gain an additional 8-16 seats. I think the final swing (averaged) was about 6% to Labor, which is absolutely massive. Howard�s fatal prediction of being annihilated in the polls did actually come to pass. Not only is the Liberal party in the woods, they are lost in the wild. The damage they took was so heavy that there is already media speculation this morning about whether the Liberal party will go the way of the Democrats and disappear from the Australian political scene entirely. Although I doubt this is the case, it goes to show the kind of deep soul searching that will be needed by the Liberal party.

As it now stands, Australia is wall-to-wall Labor. Every state and territory government in the country is held by Labor. The federal government is now Labor. Labor dominates in the lower and upper houses of parliament. To draw an analogy: imagine that every American state had a Democrat governor and that the President was a Democrat. Combine this with the Democrats holding the balance of power in the Senate as they currently do. This is exactly how it is in Australia right now (although we have to wait until June for the transfer of power in the Senate).

This is a situation that is absolutely unprecedented in Australian history and although it reflects in part the success of Labor, it is more of an indictment on how badly the Liberal Party has failed. There are state Labor governments that do not deserve their position (NSW Labor is the best example) but continue to win elections due to an ineffective, talentless and lost Opposition.

I think it is fair to say that the Liberal party asserted its economic priorities to the detriment of its moral ones and this, above else, was what cost them the election. They focussed on economic factors to the point where they forgot they also needed to have a moral compass in their role as political leaders. People feel guilty about voting Liberal and feel the need to justify it on economic grounds. Voting Liberal has become associated with voting without a moral conscience. This should not be the case: the Liberal party has every right, nay an obligation, to have policy on moral and social issues but this seems to have been misunderstood by the Party who have filled their moral vacuum with right-wing ideology. The Liberal party of today has lost the spirit of the true liberalism they upheld when the party was first formed (which is exactly why great Liberal leaders of the past such as Malcolm Fraser have divorced themselves from the Party).

The Liberal Party may have belatedly realised this and tried to rectify it in their last-minute efforts on climate change and Aboriginal issues but the public, with a cynicism bred by a decade of inaction, saw this as ineffective and poorly planned policy at best, and the desperate vote-buying acts of a Party trying to catch up on changing public opinion - and failing - at worst.

So now we have placed our trust in Kevin Rudd and stand at the precipice of a new era in Australian political history. Don�t let us down.

Christmas. We�re told it�s a time of love, of family, of thinking of others and experiencing the joy of giving.

Bullshit. Christmas is really the time for all the politically-correct ideologues and fun-nazis to come out and play, killing any Christmas spirit left desperately clinging in this absurd world and crushing the simple joys of children.

This year, the fun-suck has begun with the recruitment company Westaff, who provide Santas to many department stores in Sydney. They told Santa trainees to replace the traditional �ho ho ho� with �ha ha ha� because �ho ho ho� might be considered derogatory to women and might scare children.

*resists urge to roll eyes so much she may become permanently blind*

Oh please.

This is what frustrates me about the modern age. As one guy said in relation to the above story, we�re become so precious about ourselves that we worry that someone, somewhere, at some time may become offended at something we do.

Last year, a school stopped celebrating Christmas because one family, who were atheists, didn�t want their children to celebrate this holiday. Now, I respect their beliefs (although I find it a little sad for their kids) but what I find extraordinary about this event was that this family demanded - and expected - the rest of the school population to also stop celebrating Christmas, just to cater for them. The hell?!

Another thing I find frustrating is schools and malls that cancel Christmas because it might offend people of other religions. Well, I know quite a few people who practice various non-Christian religions and none of them have ever expressed any desire for people to stop celebrating Christmas. The PC Nazis are so uptight, they�re trying to stop things even in the absence of anyone being offended.

My idea is simple: celebrate Christmas. Don�t celebrate it. It doesn�t matter. Do exactly as you choose to do and remember that no one with any sense begrudges someone celebrating (or not celebrating) a festival important to them.

Since Australia is predominantly comprised of people with some kind of Judaeo-Christian upbringing, Christmas will be the festival of choice of most. That doesn�t mean anyone is forced to celebrate Christmas, just don't hate on the people who do. It�s really not some kind of Anglo-Saxon/Christian conspiracy - it�s just a bunch of people celebrating a good time in the way they were raised to.

But before I go, also a word to that other segment of the population who bothers me: those who disdainfully refer to Christmas as �too commercial� and refuse to celebrate it solely on those grounds. Damn, that bugs me. Yes, Christmas has become quite a commercial event, no dispute about that. That doesn�t mean you have to fall prey to the Hallmark cards or the �Christmas sale� specials. Christmas is a time about family and friends and this has NEVER changed.

You can make Christmas as special or as cheap as you like. Commercialism isn�t forced on anyone, so refusing to celebrate a holiday because of that is just a weak-ass excuse (not to mention, I suspect, a way for cheapskates to avoid giving presents).

Man stones two dogs to death 15 years ago.

He has suffered a range of misfortunes since then.

Man puts two and two together and thinks he is cursed for his inhumane actions.

To lift the curse, man marries dog in a traditional Hindi ceremony.

I really don�t think I can add any more to this - speaks for itself really. Read here.

�cane toad golf is a way of life

�you went to or know someone who went to UQ or QUT

�you�ve frequented the RE, the Regatta, Gilhooleys or the Vic

�you�ve had yum cha in Chinatown

�you go to RiverFire

�you love the Ekka

�you understand when I say �the emo haven outside HJ�s in the Queen St Mall�

�you know what a nikko, popper and refedex are

��heading to the beach� means a choice between north and south: Sunshine or the Goldie

��road trip� usually involves the Pacific Motorway

�a night on the town usually means a night in the Valley

�you�ve had E offered to you at The Family

�taking the bus means waiting for half an hour, while three full buses zoom past and the fourth just doesn�t show up

�taking the train means squeezing up like sardines in a can

�mangoes are just something you pick off the tree in your backyard or your neighbours backyard - not something you buy

�seeing the cricket means going to the �Gabba

�October means Jacarandas in bloom and summer means frangipanis in bloom all over the city

�you know that ever K over is a killer

�you know that �if you drink and drive, you�re a bloody idiot�

�you drink XXXX

�spring means Attack Of The Magpies

�when Sunday trading is a relatively new invention and the city is deserted on a Sunday evening

�you have an appreciation for bridges

�you�ve worn stubbies or thongs (or both)� sometimes with a �wife-beater�

�when you have to have 4-minute showers

�when you�re overjoyed about rain, even after it�s been raining 10 days straight

�you know Vulture Street isn�t just the name off a Powderfinger album

�when �The King� means Wally Lewis, not Elvis Presley

�if you prefer league to union and call football soccer

�you say �mar-one� not �mar-oon�

�you can go to swamplands of Florida or the steaming deltas of Louisiana and say, �what humidity?�

�you�ve made-out at Mt Coot-tha

�you know how to pronounce Indooroopilly, Yerongpilly and Mooloolaba

�you have an intense dislike for northsiders if you�re from the southside and vice-versa

�you drink Bundy

�you know what Bundy is

�you�ve done the run to Yatala just for the pies - or it�s a necessary stop on the way home from the Coast

�where winter means a low of 5 degrees and summer means a high of 38

�you know what I mean when I say �the nightmare that is Coro Drive�

�you put �but� at the end of the sentence instead of in front (e.g. �I didn�t know you were coming but�)

�you live within 10km of a Westfield

�your mantra is �slip slop slap�

�you call it a bottle-o, not a bottle shop

�you support the Broncos, the Lions, the Roar, the Reds

�you listen to Powderfinger, the Veronicas, Butterfingers, Katie Noonan, Custard or the �Gurge,

�when catching a live gig means going to the Zoo, or the Arena, or the Tivoli or heading out to Boondall and, if it�s REALLY big, maybe the Premier will open up Suncorp Stadium especially

�you�ve caught a comedy act at the Powerhouse

�public transport means taking a CityCat down the river, not a bus down the road

�its Brisvegas, not Brisbane

Well, I don't hate it. It's different but change is good (at least that's what I keep telling myself).

* I posted this on my regular blog about a week ago but I thought I'd share it here anyway :


1. Moulded black bodysuit vs.

I am so going to name drop. Tonight, I met Andrew Bartlett (former leader of the Australian Democrat Party) and Helen Darville (aka Helen Demidenko). I didn't quite have the balls to debate politics with Andrew (he was quite personable though, even asking me about my own blog - when I had to explain that the most pressing concern on my blog of late is when I'm next going to get a date :P). I did talk about hair and braiding with Helen, though.