...So how's all that been working out for you?
Let me start off a little different and tell you what I'm not, as most of the profiles here are lost in the sea of generic douchebaggery. Aside from not being any of the above, I'm not your "yo homie yo, hit me up/holla" type. Nor am I the giant striped tank top wearing "hipster" with the capris, scruffy beard and no job persona (...I'm at a loss as to how to make further fun of something that I truly can't comprehend). I'm also not that spray tanned/Mangerine jock who stands around in the bathroom mirror taking pictures of himself without a shirt on (Congrats on the abs "bro", sorry about the small penis). I don't have "FML" tattooed on my forehead and I'm not the $30,000 Scottsdale-ionaire with a popped collar, a thick white belt and an attitude.
You won't find that typical club hopper/bar star here who needs to go out every night of the week. But just because I'm not really into the bar/club scene doesn't mean that I don't enjoy having a great night on the town; be it jeans & tshirt casual or going all out in our finest threads. I'm also perfectly comfortable with a movie night on the couch; sharing a laugh at a great comedy, being drawn in to some intense forensic drama and even jumping out of my seat when something scares the bejebus out of me. It's ok, you can laugh. I'm not ashamed.
I'm well aware that those with short attention spans are long gone, but for those interested enough to read more about someone who is 2 parts Wit, 1 part Sarcasm and a shot of Snark, shall we move on?
A brief summary of my general interests would include Snowboarding, Surfing, Camping, Sportbikes (I have an R1), Electronic Music (Progressive House, DnB, DJ'ing), Snorkeling, Sharks & other Sea Life (especially combined with snorkeling), Gadgets/Techy Things, Guitars, Cooking, Being a Smart Ass, Fidgeting, Handguns and Long-range precision shooting.
I often take trips to San Diego, Burbank, San Francisco and NYC. Sometimes for work, sometimes for fun. To say that I travel a lot would be an understatement, so travel should also big on your list.
As for what I look for in another person? How realistic do you want me to get? Ok, here's a shot. You = intelligent, sincere, have a wickedly sarcastic sense of humor, a quick tongue (for wit, gutter mind), an iq that relays better interests than things like Nascar or "reality tv" (which really is an oxymoron in itself). You have a fondness for movies/film, comfy nights in, painting the town red, motorcycles, cats, swanky martinis, fine wines, culinary exploration, travel, snowboarding and even playing games. The idea of running around at Disneyland makes your eyes light up even brighter than they already are, and the notion of thrill rides at Six Flags and Universal Studios brings a devilish smile to your face (translation: please enjoy theme parks).
Also looking for a great dance partner/instructor; some of my favorites are Tango, Foxtrot, Rumba, Waltz, Cha Cha and East Coast Swing.
Bottom line, I'm not too picky about who I spend my time with, right?
Oh, and as appealing as it sounds, I have very little interest that your screen name is HotChickWithBigBoobs69, or that your profile pic shows "you" in some half naked suggestive pose and strangely enough, your inbox is overflowing with misspelled drivel from thugs, Homie-G-Poptarts and other nondescript asshattery. None of this changes the very likely statistic that you're actually an overweight, middle aged guy with a balding mullet still living in mom's basement with nothing better to do than troll the internet. Thanks, but not quite what I'm looking for. Get over it. And clean up your room.