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27 San Diego, CA Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 21–40
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 11:02am
5' 8" (1.73m)
Body Type
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
I approve of myself and possibly you, depending on how many R. Kelly lyrics you've committed to memory.

Writer by day, standup comic by night.

I believe in bigfoot, my favorite rappers are professional wrestlers and I once had a strong emotional bond with a sea monkey. And unlike my esteemed colleagues on this site, I have never owned a single brimmed hat.

I failed the Myers-Briggs test.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Career trajectory is as follows: Dating blogger --> Political canvasser --> Alaskan fishing guide --> Movie theater manager --> Full-time writer. So really I'm not completely sure.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Deterring apex predators. Making people laugh in basements. Saying what kind of birds those are even though nobody asked.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Eyes the color of dolphin tears (of joy).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Jack London, John Steinbeck, Thomas Mann, Emile Zola, James Baldwin, Slavoj Zizek, everything Werner Herzog has ever done, Step Brothers, Peep Show, Rammstein, Laibach, The Crystal Method, The Prodigy, Morrissey against my better judgment, fruit and vegetables.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Magic everywhere in this bitch
Angry internet people
Randy Savage
90s breakbeat
The British
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why women are all like, "Nee nee nee nee!" And guys are all like, "Hurr durr hurr hurr durr!"
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Handsome yet attainable.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Keanu Reeves is gay.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You can identify jokes in the wild.

You can cure my hilariously overblown fear of sharks.

You've never written the string "bahahahaha..."