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MaxTheHuman

27 M Palatine, IL

My Details

Last Online
Today – 11:09am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Never
Religion
Sign
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Technology
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Likes dogs and likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), C++ (Fluently), Spanish (Okay), Japanese (Poorly)

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My self-summary
I can't grow a beard, I don't have tattoos, and I will probably never live in the city proper. For the 10% who haven't lost interest yet, thanks.

I work, I drink beer, I play video games. I enjoy going out when there's stuff to do, and am pretty content staying at home otherwise. I pay my bills, own a motorcycle, and will rock out at Rock Band if given the chance. It drives me up the wall when people leave dirty dishes in the sink for more than a week (looking at you, roommate).

I have a collection of hats that is both impressive and concerning, ranging from stove pipe to pirate. I love to canoe, despite the fact that I always end up a lobster by the end. I usually think I'm handier than I actually am; case in point I tried building a couch once and ended up building a book case. Figure that one out. (to be fair, I was pretty drunk at the time)

My family's really into music. We all own at least 4 different musical instruments. I can at least play all of mine in a somewhat coherent manner.

I'm afraid one day I'll drink coffee too regularly and it'll lose its magical restorative powers. It's a desperate battle between wanting coffee and needing coffee that I think I will ultimately lose.
What I’m doing with my life
Using Internet references in everyday conversation and watching 7/10 people be utterly confused.

I got a degree in computer science which I'm using to pay it off one loan at a time by maintaining computers that sell you drugs. Unless you get your drugs from Canada; I hear they have cheap Viagra.

Trying to be healthy and avoid genetically predesposed heart problems, while simultaneously trying to cheat at the eye doctor to have an excuse to become a hipster. I'm 90% sure that was a joke.

I went to Japan and it was awesome despite me and my friends being embarrassingly American. South Korea was "meh" in comparison. Where will I go next... Canada perhaps?
I’m really good at
Good: Starting projects.
Bad:Finishing projects.
See what I did there?
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Let's keep this a simple smattering of my favorite things across genres.

Books: Hitchhiker's Guide, World War Z, Wrinkle in Time
TV: Doctor Who, Supernatural, New Girl, Adventure Time
Moves: The Blues Brothers, any Monty Python movie
Games: L4D2, Settlers of Catan, Euchre (because I'm an old white woman)
Music: Rush, Coheed, Ninja Sex Party
Food: Tacos, Pad Thai, Dill Pickles on anything (but not fried)

And being a beer nerd, my top 3 beers so far:
1. Dogfishhead's 120-minute IPA
2. Chimay's Red
3. New Holland's Dragon's Milk
The six things I could never do without
I think we'll get along if you enjoy the following:
1. Beer
2. Jam Sessions
3. Games (video/board/card variety)
4. Doctor Who
5. Drum Corps
6. Reddit (more accurately, Imgur)
7. Camping
8. Breaking rules about lists
9. Game Grumps
I spend a lot of time thinking about
The perfect place to live (hint, pretty sure it is non-existent)
How much money I can spend a month on Chipotle before it becomes a problem.
Ron Swanson.
On a typical Friday night I am
Beer and Board Games.
Crafting something IRL.
Marathoning Netflix.
Not knowing the difference between women and 12 year old boys in online games.
Or you know, socializing somewhere with food and beverage. Touring microbreweries is always awesome.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I'm introverted and especially so with new people. Makes me come off as boring or uninterested usually, and thus dating is a struggle. Hey, we're all on this site for a reason.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 24–30
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating
You should message me if
...you want to talk to me, because I almost guarantee I won't message you. If I do, it's because I already am in love with you. Let's have babies, 500 of them.
I know it's hard to message people with something interesting. As long as it's not ALL CAPS or all lowercase and references something in my profile, you're good. And more than, let's say, four words.