Reading over my old summary, I have to say that it isn't nearly as good as I thought it was. I've removed it for further study.

I'm a PoliSci/Econ major at WSU, and a foreign policy executor for one of the largest conflict-resolution organizations in the world (Which is to say, I'm an Infantryman-turned-MP for the Ohio National Guard.)

I'm a card-carrying member of the ACLU, the VFW, and the EFF. I don't think there's any conflict in that at all.

I'm the best dialogist in the world. I'm so good that Raymond Chandler rose from his grave and shambled halfway across the country to shake my hand and tell me so. Then he told me who killed the chauffeur.

I've lost some range over the last few years, but I can still sing Baritone.

I look really, really good in a snap brim hat.

I've been told that my eyebrows are extraordinary.

Also, I am the unashamed Lord of Puns. Usually bad ones. They might be the lowest form of humor...but they are also therefore the foundation of all wit.

Oh boy, here comes the lists...

A)
American Gods by Neil Gaiman. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay by Michael Chabon. The Blind Assassin by Margaret Atwood. Cryptonomicon by Neal Stephenson. The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Nighttime by Mark Haddon. Guns, Germs, and Steel by Jared Diamond Hazardous Duty by Col. David Hackworth. I'm Just Here for the Food by Alton Brown. The Moon is Down by John Steinbeck. Neuromancer by William Gibson. Spoon River Anthology by Edgar Lee Masters. Freakonomics by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner. To Kill a Mocking Bird by Harper Lee

B)
Casablanca, Star Wars, Amélie, Breaker Morant, Mr. Smith Goes to Washington, Spirited Away

C)
Jonathon Coulton, Dar Williams, Barenaked Ladies, Bill Staines, Indigo Girls, Moxy Fruovous, Patsy Cline, Christine Lavin, David Wilcox, Leonard Cohen, Melissa Etheridge, John Williamson, Tom Smith.

D)
Hamburgers from Clancy's Tavern. Chorizo con huevos. Anything from Chipotle. Omelets, made by me. Saffron rice with chicken. Fried Chicken with Pomegranite (I discovered this by accident last year...it's great in a salad, or using pomegranite juice in a sauce!).

There's no "E", but for TV shows, I have:
Good Eats, Firefly, Scrubs, Cowboy Bebop, Countdown with Keith Olberman, 30 Rock, Sports Night

1) My family. Family is, I think, the people who put up with your weirdness because they know that they really don't have room to talk.

2) Cats.

3) My Computer

4) The National Guard. I've made friends with people I would never have otherwise met, because our backgrounds and lifestyles are so different. It's also paid for my schooling, and let me do a lot of aweseome things.

5) Coffee

6) Food. Good food is probably my biggest vice. I'm addicted to Chipotle burritos, and I love seeing how far I can stretch the definition of "omelet".

How best to reconcile my liberal/progressive tendencies with the very conservative cultures I tend to find myself in.

How far away I am from Austin, TX at any particular moment. Man, I love that place.

And cats. I spend a lot of time thinking about cats.

If I have drill the next morning, I'm asleep. If I don't, I'm probably hanging out with my friends, either making dinner or hitting up whatever live music we can find. A lot of people don't realize that Dayton has some pretty good music.

Until November 2006, there was a bright Blue Clocktower in downtown Dayton. It looked like something out of a Fisher-Price toyset, and it never, to my knowledge, actually told the correct time.

When I left Ohio at about age 5 or so, I decided that The Blue Clocktower didn't really exist. After all, why would anybody build anything that ridiculous? The Blue Clocktower was as silly as talking dogs or transforming robot/cars. Clearly, I just had an over active imagination.

Fifteen years later, I returned to the Gem City. I was driving along I-75, when suddenly...there was The Clocktower!. I damn near ran myself off the edge of the road in shock.

Ever since then, I've never really trusted my own memory or perception. If the Giant Blue Clocktower was real, then my entire definition of reality was suspect.

I'm not saying I'm holding my breath for the talking mice and transforming robots, I'm just saying that if they do show up, I'll have the Scooby Snacks and/or energon crystals ready.

Any reason you want. I'd love to hear what you have to say. I promise to reply too...I know how hard it is figure out what to say on these things, and I appreciate the effort.

Please be honest about why you're messaging though. I like dramatic language, but I'm also a firm believer in saying what you mean.