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27 F Middlesbrough, United Kingdom

My Details

Last Online
Today – 5:42pm
5′ 4″ (1.63m)
Body Type
Full figured
Strictly anything
Aquarius, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from two-year college
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and has cats
English (Fluently), French (Poorly)

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My self-summary
My friends call me Emma, as that is my name.
Recently I've somehow found myself in a titchy social bubble, gathering progessively concerning hermit status. Looking for at least some online chattage from here..
Stuff about me.. I work hard, laugh a lot, I watch films to the end, even if they're rubbish, attempting to avoid the rubbish ones because of this, but there's always a few sneaky minx type ones that catch me off guard.

I'm the most passive person I know, I'd just rather not deal with angry people and unnecessarily dramatic situations. Can't we all just get along?
Obviously not.. But y'know, bigger picture. Pick your battles. Don't be a twat.

Live music is extraordinary. There's just something about a room/field of strangers sharing a lovely sing-along moment that is just darn tootin' beautiful. I gig as often as possible and trudge to Download Festival every year, the people that go are the nicest I've met at any type of gig. It's hard not to appreciate a smiley metalhead.
What I’m doing with my life
Slowly transforming into a cat lady with my recent gathering of a kitten. Seriously, I'm getting worried at how long I can watch her play with a ball of foil. It's ridiculous.

Avoiding reality tv shows as they make me despair for the human race. I sucessfully manage to dodge the actual shows. Unfortunately, as I work in an office environment, I get them described and discussed regardless. *shakes angry fist*

Spending time with my beautiful and strange little nieceling and attempting to ignore The Parentals when they hint at where their next grandchild should come from.

Other than these three important parts of my life, I'm working, going out with mates, becoming obsessed with everything on and being aware of how old I'm getting. Since when do they serve children in pubs?! I feel like a chaperone at a school disco..
I’m really good at
Making people laugh.
Dying a line around my forehead when I colour my hair.
Singing - as long as nobody calls attention to it.. Stage fright ahoy!
Overthinking things
Being sarcastic.
Applying eyeshadow.
Making lime and lemongrass turkey burgers.
Losing socks.
Leaving the last biscuit for somebody else, but staring at it until consumption, then questioning why that person isn't as self sacrificing as I am.
The first things people usually notice about me
Colours, smiley face, the fact that I'm probably waving..

I sing.. Especially if music is playing, I'm pretty nifty at remembering lyrics so if you want to be able to hear the actual artists sing the words, you should plug your headphones in.

I tend to talk about films and Tv as if I'm friends with the characters. Luckily I watch cool things so it's not like I'm mates with loads of wankii.

I don't like to be wrong.. But I'm too lazy to be stubborn. I just pretend that I knew all along.

I use way too many Teessideisms than I'm comfortable with. "Ayaz" is the only one I allow myself but an occasional "like" and "proper" sneak in sometimes.. The scallywags.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
I'm a huge fan of escapism (not that I have anything to escape from, zombies etc..) So will be very happy to get lost in a book or film.

Bookswise, I like my classics
Jane Eyre
Tess of the D'ubervilles
Most things Shakespeare..
Sherlock Holmes
All things Gaiman
A few series (serii?) Ice and Fire, His Dark Materials.
But I'll read most things. I'd prefer it to be good but I can never stop reading or watching something until it's finished, which can be quite frustrating if it turns out to be a load o' balls..

Limited to 10 films I could watch at any time.. (I started limited to 5 but it was too difficult)
Annie Hall
Singin in the Rain
Scott Pilgrim vs the World
500 Days of Summer (always tempted to stop watching before the the last couple of lines..)
Josie and the Pussycats
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Withnail and I
Pulp Fiction
A little eclectic, I know.. I'm not sure if the variety would help or hinder in getting to know me. I can keep going?

Will limit self again.
Joss Whedon things (Buffy/Angel/Firefly etc)
Period dramas
Sherlock (oh my amazing..)
Dr Who
The Good Wife
Veronica Mars
Breaking Bad

Y'know, the good stuff. None of this Geordie Shore and Tipping Point malarky..

Tend to lean towards pop punk/rock/most things where an actual BAND is involved.
Fleetwood Mac, Biffy Clyro, Tegan and Sara, Alkaline Trio, Frank Turner (especially before he got famous)..
Have also been known to dabble in a bit o'Beach Boys, 80's pop, Motown and musical soundtracks.
Generally though, anything I can sing to whilst air grabbing is preferable.

Chicken. It's just amazing. They're also not overly cute whilst alive so they don't taste like guilt and sadness.
I'm more of a savoury gal than dessert. Sorbet would be my pudding of choice.
"I'll take a Lemon Bottom please Mr Ice Cream Vendor"
"You mean a Lemon Top? Loads of creamy ice cream with a dash of sorbet?"
"... No."

Foodstuffwise I'll try most things not overly spicey. Especially lovely Mexican/Italian/Chinese type foodstuffs.
The six things I could never do without
*Gummy sweets
*Clean pants
*Other people (preferably family and friends..)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
*If it would really matter if I had another biscuit/slice of toast/gin and bitter lemon.

*What I would say to Benedict Cumberbatch or Stephen Fry if I met them..

*How I could store Benedict in my cupboard without him suffocating..
On a typical Friday night I am
Doing my washing and watching a dvd/reading/hanging out with my cat.

I know, rock and roll right?

Flashback to 5 years ago when I was out boogying my backside off with a pitcher of lethal alcoholic beverage with people that I can't actually remember the names of..
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I eat way too much toast.

It doesn't sound too private or dangerous written down but I think I have a serious problem.. If you're aware of any support groups, let me know. Ta duck.
I’m looking for
  • Guys who like girls
  • Ages 25–34
  • Near me
  • For new friends
You should message me if
*Talking to someone who references films and tv shows a lot wouldn't make you want to beat them with things.

*You have spellchecked your profile, totally okay if you're just a bad speller but text speak makes my soul die. Why, oh why, use "a" in the place of "I"? It makes no sense at all and gets me a smidge bit miffed.

*You have perfected a "Film Nazi Glare" to punish those people who talk through films.

*Not one of your pictures is a shirtless pose and you don't use winky faces in messages..

Mainly though.. You're funny, have never been to Magaluf by choice and love your Mam.