I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I object to this section in the strongest possible terms. I don't
consider myself to be "really good" at anything. David Foster
Wallace was "really good" at writing. Linus Torvalds is "really
good" at software engineering. Louis CK is "really good" at
So, instead, have a list of things about myself that I like.
1. I can run 5 minutes without slowing to a walk.
1a. I regularly spend those 5 minutes thinking about prison
1b. Or thinking about how fucking high on endorphins running
makes me and wondering if high functioning drug users are more
likely to work out than non drug users, since their drug use speaks
to a certain love of altered states of consciousness, which the
giddy happy puddle I turn into after finishing a run definitely
1c. Or working on half-finished comedy bits about wanting to
grow up to be Tom Waits, which I never write down and almost
certainly will never perform, because A) I'd need to work on my Tom
Waits impression and, B) I'm not a comedian.
2. I have about a 75% success rate at flipping a fried egg
without breaking it.
3. In the last year I went from not knowing the first thing
about computer programming to... sort of knowing the first thing
about computer programming.
4. If my vocabulary was a penis, it would be at least 7
4a. The most recent new word I've learned is "charcuterie",
which has been Baader-Meinhoffing its way through my life for the
4b. Prior to charcuterie, the last thing that I experienced
the Baader-Meinhof Phenomenon about was the Baader-Meinhof
5. I know how to fold a paper crane.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I was once informed by the owner of my favorite pizza place that I
have "the manner and demeanor of an international art thief." I
hope this is the first thing everyone notices about me.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
For a very specific definition of "do without":
1. Tech that keeps me in touch with far away friends.
2. A comfortable bed, a large desk to sprawl all my projects
across, a decent kitchen.
3. A home in a city.
4. Clever art.
5. My passport.
6. Winter boots.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
"May you live in interesting times."
"May you come to the attention of important people."
"May you get what you want."
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're an adventurous nerd.
You have a nice kitchen.
You want to go to stand up shows with me.
You're outgoing and snarky-but-not-judgemental and are amused by my
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