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36 Chicago, IL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 25-45
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Feb 2
Native American, White
6' 0" (1.83m)
Body Type
Other and laughing about it
Two-year college
Doesn’t have kids
English (Fluently), German (Somewhat), Chinese (Somewhat)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
"I'm a wrecking ball with a heart of gold.
Acting like a child while I'm growing old."
-Dieter Merckel

I am a visual artist, musician, DJ, stand-up comedian, and occasional math tutor. I prefer to laugh as much as possible.

I have a tattoo of the cover of Shel Silverstein's "The Giving Tree" that is old enough to legally drive a car in most states.

I have a bizarre sense of humor that makes it difficult for many people to discern when I'm joking. This is exacerbated by my announcer-like voice, and the fact that most of my true anecdotes sound like fiction. For example: a conversion van that I once owned was featured in a few episodes of the HBO television show "The Wire".
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I just moved to Chicago last year. I'm trying to get to know all 2.7 million people here.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
...being funny, being affectionate, being attractive, and... uh... art.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My booming, resonant, baritone voice; my adorable Southern accent; the infectious smile from which that voice emanates; and the gorgeous red beard that surrounds that mouth.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: almost anything by Kurt Vonnegut or David Sedaris
Movies: almost anything by Wes Anderson
TV Shows: Parks and Recreation, Project Runway, Archer, Modern Family, Drunk History, The Eric Andre Show, Scandal, Arrested Development.
Music: This is always such a tough question. Here are a few off the top of my head: Alice Coltrane, Com Truise, Of Montreal, Death Grips, Danny Brown, Earl Sweatshirt, Daft Punk, The Hood Internet, Neon Indian, Girl Talk, Frank Ocean, The White Mandingos, Pizzicato Five, Charles Earland, Alan Hawkshaw, etc...
Food: Mexican, Thai, Ethiopian, Jamaican, American Comfort Food, Vietnamese, decadent sandwiches... I live dangerously close to the restaurant "Cookies and Carnitas".
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
In no particular order: creativity, hugs, laughter, cooking, music, alcoholic beverages.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
way too much.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
There are no typical Friday nights for me. I may be dj-ing a party, staying home and cooking a huge dinner, tossing back bourbon at the bar with friends, or rescuing kittens from burning buildings.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My voicemail outgoing message was recorded in 2005, in Baltimore, Maryland. I was 26 years old, and it was my first cellular telephone. I've never lost or broken a mobile phone. So, I've upgraded for free throughout the years, and I've never changed the outgoing message because I want to see how long I can keep it. It will be a solid decade this October.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over. have a remarkable sense of humor and you'd like to exchange hundreds of laughs over a few drinks. are also new to Chicago and want to check out some galleries and/or music venues together. are a long-time citizen of Chicago that would like to show me some cools spots, and bask in my bewildered merriment.'re looking for a safe, fun, friend with possible benefits

...(most importantly) you can say more than "hey nice pics". Captivate me and be honest about yourself.