Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


46 M Santa Monica, CA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 33–51
  • Located anywhere
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Online now!
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Other, and very serious about it
Leo, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from masters program
Science / Engineering
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Strictly monogamous
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
The more I learn, the less I know...

I hate the "dating game"! In some ways, I'm way better *in*
relationship than in bringing one about. A large part of this is that I'm kind of shy with people I haven't met, whether it's in a bar or on here, it feels extra-awkward. Know that if I've messaged you on here, there was something that *really* got my attention because it took something to override my natural habits (I realize this doesn't necessarily score any "extra credit").

I am one of the nice guys :) Really. Hoping to find someone for whom that's an unequivocal positive - and honestly, for someone not looking for (consciously or unconsciously) a "bad boy" to challenge them. Just because I'm nice doesn't mean I'm bland or uninteresting; I've cultivated a lot of very interesting and unusual experiences, and will always want to grow and expand and experience new, out-of-the-box things with a like-minded partner.

I *love* strong women. It's kind of a must-have for me, a strong/dominant personality, and someone who's at least a bit (if not a lot) of a tomboy and not bound by traditional gender roles.

I am also a bit of a nerd, in both the positive and negative senses of that word. I'm really smart and well-read and very much want a partner I can connect with on an intellectual level. I'm also, despite being able to blend in your basic crowd ok, fundamentally I'm a non-conformist and somewhat of a rebel, and would love a partner who is just a bit "different" herself.

A big part of my life is my spiritual path. It could be classified as "new-age" with elements of both Christianity and eastern religions. I realize in saying this I've probably just simultaneously alienated both the committed atheists on here (which is a fairly large group!), *and* the conventionally church-oriented highly-religious as well!! However, my spiritual orientation to life is a core of who I am; I believe that life IS spiritual, inherently, and that there's so much more going on here than the five senses show us... and that's at the cornerstone of the partnership I want to have; a mutual recognition that this is so. For me, the the main purpose of a relationship is to learn and grow together.

Is all this too much to ask? I hope not. I have a lot to offer to the right partner, could it be you??
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Searching for my soulmate!! And in the meantime... Perpetual self-discovery, applying my technical background toward service in the world, keeping the technology around me up and running (I am the guy to call if your computer is giving you problems, or to connect up your audio-visual equipment). Constantly learning and growing. Live audio mixing at seminars and workshops. Discovering all kinds of cool historical documentaries on Netflix (I have had an interest in U.S. Presidents since I was a little kid, and my latest fascination is the Space Program of the 1960's).
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Listening, being very present with a partner, giving massages, fixing your computer when it's been giving you problems. Problem-solving in general. My job: producing/engineering a live event (audio/video/Internet) from the ground-up. Good intellectual conversation. I have ridiculous amounts of trivia floating around in my brain -- and an insatiable craving for ever-more information. Finding a good deal. I'm a very energetic karaoke singer (it's one place where my full Leo comes out to shine!).
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Generically, probably a combination of a nice guy / shy guy (I tend to have no poker face whatsoever, so what you see is what you get).
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books: All time favorite fiction: Illusions by Richard Bach. Any good historical biography (e.g. Abraham Lincoln). Good metaphysical reads. Anything by John-Roger.

Movies: Stardust, Shawshank Redemption, Titanic, Groundhog Day, Moulin Rouge, Back to the Future, The Bucket List, Good Will Hunting, and my all-time favorite (from the first day I saw it): Forrest Gump. Also, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button; an amazing movie and message:

Shows: Don't watch much current TV at all. All time favs: most David Kelley (Boston Legal, Ally McBeal, Picket Fences, etc.), St. Elsewhere, Star Trek: TOS, TNG, & DS9 before it got too dry... Lately on Netflix I've been watching Lie to Me, Numb3rs, and Life. Latest binge-watch: Ken Burns' "The Roosevelts".

Music: Very eclectic tastes inspired by what I grew up with: classic rock, 80's music, soft rock, smooth jazz, even occasional country. Anything that isn't too harsh or angry. I've really learned to appreciate the magic of a well-produced record with clean sound (for example, Steely Dan, Pink Floyd). I am a big fan of Jeff Lynne's work with Electric Light Orchestra/Traveling Wilbury's/Tom Petty, etc. The more I learn about music, the more awestruck I am with the Beatles and the depth and versatility of what they created, in such a short time, and inventing it all as they went along.

Food: Raised on middle-America meat 'n potatoes, I have over the last few years started to learn what eating healthy is. That said, I still love a good burger. Anything with a really tasty sauce (yes, good ketchup counts).
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Interesting problems to solve
Intellectual stimulation
A computer with a fast Internet connection
My smart phone
A very reliable car
My daily Americano, preferably organic
Indulging in late-night takeout from In-N-Out!
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
the meaning of Life, how the world works, how I've gotten to where I am and where it is I want to go. What can be done, and what I can do, to help get the world moving on a healthier track. I am fascinated by history, politics, technology, psychology, and generally am an information junkie. It has always been a passion of mine to understand how things work.

That it couldn't be that difficult to create a better online dating site than this!! (Is saying this going to get me censored?) I haven't found anything better, but it seems so "dumbed down" from what it could be!
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Any one of the following: Perhaps at a class, the gym, going to bed early to prepare for an early morning work seminar, watching a documentary on Amazon Prime/Netflix, or clicking "Browse Matches" on OKCupid one more time like an addict at a roulette wheel thinking "this will be the time..."
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sometimes I almost wish I were Jewish; partly this is due to my consistent attraction to Jewish women, and partly an affinity with my perception of the culture. I *loved* the documentary "When Jews Were Funny", it was an amazing ode to a somewhat disappearing American Jewish culture. I've even considered the Larry David-esque idea of going to synagogues to attempt to meet women.

On a completely different note, I think this is fucking awesome!:

Once I trust somebody (and this doesn't have to take very long when there's a nice connection), I am pretty open and would hope that with my partner it would be a near-automatic feeling like I could just share anything and everything, including "deep dark secrets".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you resonate with some or all of the following: You're really smart and looking for someone to match you in an intelligent, deep conversation. You're used to being the "smartest one in the room" and would like to meet someone who challenges you. You are a good-hearted person seeking the same. You've done a good level of personal growth/introspective work, and self-awareness is a priority in your life. You're sweet and/or charming. You're looking for someone to act a fool with (borrowed from another profile because I loved it!). You know that you are a "great catch", and have been wondering where the heck your soulmate is and why he hasn't shown up yet!
** You are drug-free. **

You would never describe yourself as "just a normal girl".

**** You are a woman that looks at relationships in an out-of-the-box way, with non-traditional views on gender roles, or with at least some tomboy in you. ****

All things being equal, someone who's local would be ideal; but if you think we might be that one-in-a-million, let's check it out and see! (I'm also at a place in my life where nothing is more important than the relationship of my dreams. That doesn't mean I'd be reckless and move tomorrow, but if something were really right, moving is definitely a possibility for me.)

*** You believe in love! (Sounds obvious, I realize, but I want someone who's looking to play the same game as me.)

*** UPDATED 9/22/14:
Even though my primary reason for being on here is looking for a long-term (hopefully lifetime) relationship, I am also very open to meeting intelligent, unique people for interesting and out-of-the-box conversations.