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26 Orem, UT Man


I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 18–26
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Online now!
Asian, Native American, Pacific Islander
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body type
Strictly anything
Other, but not too serious about it
Working on university
Less than $20,000
Has cats

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Hello there! I'm kyle, i like finding new music, collecting records, meeting new people, having weird conversations, telling inappropriate jokes at inappropriate times, sushi, pancakes, comics, and video games. I have the longest name ever, I wear the shit out of a good cardigan, my body is made up of at least 85% pizza and soda, and moms like me because I'm quiet and nice (most of the time.)* these are all of the important things to know about me.

*I had to add that part to make myself sound dangerous and therefore sexier. As you read it, just imagine me putting on some badass shades, lighting up a cigarette and riding away on a sweet Harley. Thanks.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Working a weird but surprisingly well paying job while trying to rediscover what I'm passionate about. I've spent too much time being a negative, depressing asshole so I'm working on being more optimistic. God that sounded corny, didn't it?
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
I'm really good at those claw machines at the grocery store. I won a stuffed Barack Obama once and have yet to top that with any other lifetime achievement. For some reason I'm really stupidly good at Mario kart. And making up rhyming puns. And I can quote the hell out of Home Alone. And I can rap all of Warren G's 'Regulate' off the top of my head. I obviously have many useful skills that translate to immense success in both business and romantic fields.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Someone told me I looked like Jimmy Fallon once. I've spotted some glaring inconsistencies with her theory...

I bet if I was a girl, people would say "that girl is nowhere near hot enough to be acting so bitchy." So there's something to think about.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Music: lately its been a bunch of depressing sad dad shit. Too much if I'm being honest.

All time favorites are The mountain goats, sonic youth, David Bowie, Wilco, Nick Cave, John Vanderslice, and fugazi

Television: broad city, always sunny, party down, bobs burgers, Nathan for you, review, drunk history, true detective, archer, squidbillies, aqua teen, China Illinois, the Eric Andre show, Check it out!, and Fargo

Lately its been sci-fi mind bendy movies that make you think, and weird crazy thrillers like nightcrawler and the Rover. Oh and heist movies, I love movies about bank robberies and junk, like Heat, The Town, and Dog Day Afternoon

Currently reading: Doctors by Dash Shaw, Summer Blonde by Adrian Tomine, and Our Band Could Be Your Life for the millionth billionth time

food: milk steak, boiled hard, with a side of your finest jelly beans

I like video games, lately I've been playing Grand Theft Auto 5, Gone Home, Destiny, Kentucky Route Zero, P.T. (holy shit right?) and Deadly Premonition.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Toilet paper (could you imagine?)
My record player

*and also footnotes.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I wonder if the first guy who ever tried to go swimming just jumped in and figured it out, or if he totally died, and then his friends died trying to save him. I bet it took a very dedicated and incredibly stupid group of at least fifteen people to try and figure swimming out. And the last guy probably drowned himself when he swam back to shore and realized all his friends were dead.

in other words, i think about really dumb shit.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Eating ice cream in sweat pants and crying by myself.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm a NeverNude
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You wanna be the Kenan to my Kel

You want to rob a bank or steal a minivan

You enjoy sushi, sad dad music, and judging strangers in public.

or maybe just wanna get tacos and play video games.