Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy


25 Oxford, UK Woman


Similar users

I’m looking for

  • Everyone
  • Ages 30-49
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 11:21am
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Strictly non-monogamous
5' 5" (1.65m)
Body Type
Other and it’s important
Working on Post grad
Doesn’t have kids and doesn’t want them
Has cats
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Queer, non-monogamous, fiercely feminist writer with a penchant for kitty ears and funny-coloured hair. Sightings most likely in the city of Oxford and its surrounding areas and around the East Midlands.

I am a contradiction: a feminist and an old fashioned romantic; shy and outspoken; extremely driven and the world's worst procrastinator; a traveller who needs a place to call home; a meticulously organised free spirit.

I have been described as "too opinionated for [my] own good" and "less innocent than [I] look." I took both as compliments.

If I came with a warning label it would say "caution: sharp claws."

I promise you I am more than you bargained for.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I don't have a life. My Masters Degree ate it., yeah, studying for an MA in fiction writing[1][2] by night. Raising money for a nonprofit theatre (a genuinely awesome job) by day.

What else?

Some form of non-monogamous (ask me, it's complicated!) and enjoying an amazing Primary relationship with the absolutely wonderful DemonBanana. Also seeing a couple here in Oxford (just stick a tail on me and call me a unicorn!)

Kinkster. You will find me out and about on the Oxford scene, probably trussed up in rope.

Sometimes people take photos of me, if they can get me to sit still long enough. I've even been paid for the privilege a small handful of times.

Classic sociable introvert. I love to socialise but find large groups of people or very loud and busy social situations difficult. Being around people for long periods depletes my energy and I need my alone time to restore it.

I'm an eclectic, Wiccan-influenced, kitchen-witchy Pantheistic Pagan.

Cat owne...umm, owned by a cat. I know my place!

My vices are gin & tonic, sugary coffee and energy drinks. Quite mad enough without anything else to help, thanks.

Travel, especially travel with a wonderful companion, is what happiness is made of.

Wherever I go, I can reliably be found drinking a caffeinated beverage and hugging someone.

[1] I fucking hate it when people use "so what do you write about?" or - worse - "are you published?" as an opening line.
[2] Yes. I use footnotes in online dating profiles. This should tell you an awful lot of what you need to know about me.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
.....getting myself into bizarre, surreal and profoundly ridiculous situations.

Luckily, I'm almost as good at navigating my way safely out of them.

Seriously though?

Words words words, from a wonderful fictional passage to the perfect love-letter.

Talking to people. GIve me ten minutes face to face and I can find a way in to connect with almost anyone.

Always being crazy-busy, but always finding time.

Going the extra step to make a loved one feel special.

Planning events (anything from a quiet dinner party for four to a gala night for 200 people) and making them go off with barely a hitch. This is both a profession and a passion.

Cooking, including vegetarian and vegan cooking. (I'm neither, but I cook for plenty of people who are one or the other.)

Being independant. I have been looking after myself - and sometimes others too - since I was 17.

Figuring things out when I've no idea how to do them.

Procrasinating. Seriously, it's an art and I have got it down.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have BRIGHT purple hair. You know the colour of a Cadbury's chocolate wrapper? That colour.

Also my kitty ears, if I'm wearing them (which, outside of work, is often.)
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Books (Fiction):
'Nineteen Minutes' (Jodi Picoult); 'Sing You Home' (Jodi Picolt); 'Tipping the Velvet' (Sarah Waters); Pages For You (Sylvia Brownrigg); 'Thursday Next' series (Jasper Fforde); 'The Hunger Games' trilogy (Suzanne Collins); 'Love You Two' (Maria Pallotta-Chiarolli); 'The Kite Runner' (Khaled Hosseini); 'Room' (Emma Donoghue); 'Atonement' (Ian McEwan)

Books (Non-fiction):
90% of my non-fiction collection is about either sexuality or writing in their various forms. This actually sums me up pretty well.

Imagine Me and You, Moulin Rouge, The Phantom of the Opera, Loving Annabelle, Milk, A Very Long Engagement, Spirited Away, 10 Things I Hate About You, Atonement, Beautiful Thing, Edge of Seventeen, Boys Don't Cry, The Hunger Games series, Pride.

Currently watching Orange Is The New Black (by myself,) and Breaking Bad (with my partner.) The L Word is my guilty pleasure.

Nightwish, Within Temptation, Evanescence, Paramore, New Years Day, Hey Monday, Delain, Kimya Dawson, Corinna Fugate, Emilie Autumn, Ingrid Michaelson.

Music (Musicals):
Les Miserables; Wicked; Into the Woods; Chess; Phantom of the Opera; Little Shop of Horrors; Fame; Avenue Q.


Ahem. Yeah, I love food.

I am pretty sure I could happily eat sushi every day for the rest of my life.

And I could not live without chocolate.

The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My wonderful partner, lovely sweeties, friends and family (both bio- and -logical) mean the absolute world to me.

They're the blood in my veins and the air I breathe.

My kitty is my child. Yes, I'm one of those awful people who prefers the company of my cat to a large percentage of the human race. SorryNotSorry.

Hugs, cuddles, kisses, touching, stroking, massage, playing with hair, sex, or just sleeping in each others' arms.

I love trying new dishes, recipes and restaurants.

From exploring a new country, to discovering something exciting right here in my own city... I crave adventure in all its forms.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Life, the Universe, and the meaning of everything.

Hah, no. Really, my thoughts are generally more along these lines...

What's for dinner?
The ongoing scheduling dance that is my life.
When is it going to stop being so fucking cold?
Where's my coffee?
*Counts days/hours until I see him next*

Oh, and I occasionally think about whatever I'm currently writing. Or thinking about writing. Or thinking that I really should be thinking about writing.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Curled up on the sofa with my Love, enjoying snuggles and good food. Fridays are for relaxing, Saturdays are for adventuring.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
Seeking kind, fun, intelligent people of any and all genders for friendship, co-adventuring and taking on the world together.

So, contact me if... like the sound of me and want to be friends first, see how we relate to each other, and let our connection fall to the level it is naturally supposed to take. are my intellectual equal. This does not necessarily mean formal academic qualifications.'re not freaked out by queerness, polyamory, feminism, BDSM, Paganism, or highly educated women. want to enthuse about a shared interest. identify as a feminist and/or lean to the left of centre politically. do NOT think 'Fifty Shades of Grey' constitutes brilliant literature. can tell me what Amaranth means and where it comes from without the aid of Google.'re both a hopeless romantic and an evil genius, with a beautiful mind and an insatiable lust for adventure.'d rather get into my head than into my pants. have a way with words that can render me utterly unable to resist your charms. actually bothered to read this profile, not just looked at the photos. value long lasting commitment over random sex or a quick hook-up.

I am not interested in being your bicurious experiment, your monogamous One And Only Forever And Ever, your first poly disaster, your unicorn, your sub, your Mistress in either sense, your bit-on-the-side, or in joining you for a threesome.

If you're a cis man, please be at least 30 and ideally have long hair.