Geez. What happened to the year? It's December, and I still have about four months' worth of stuff to do before the end of the year...which is two weeks away.

*Sigh*

In other news, I went out to California last week for my uncle's memorial service. He was adamant that he didn't want a religious ceremony, and in fact, he didn't want any fuss made at all. For about a week after he passed away, it didn't look like there'd be any kind of memorial. And that just didn't sit well with me. My aunt really wanted to respect my uncle's wishes, but I think she needed something. In fact, I think we all needed something.

So friends of my aunt got together and planned a very simple memorial reception. My mom and other family members gathered together as many photos of my aunt and uncle as we could find, and my aunt's friend Nancy created a huge poster-size photo montage and a looping video slideshow.

I was there with my mom and dad, my brother, my mom's brother and his wife, and about 100 of my aunt and uncles' many friends and business associates.

Several people got up to speak, including my uncle's doctor. Of course, the "event" (we never did come up with a name that seemed appropriate) was sad and I was in tears about half the time. But his doctor had some really beautiful things to say about how hard my uncle fought, and how he knew when it was time to stop fighting. I learned much more about my uncle's last few days, and I learned that he died on his own terms, to the extent he was able to.

So, in terms of having closure, and giving people a time and place to gather together and mourn, and giving us all a chance to see my uncle and remember him in happier times, the event was a huge success. Surprisingly so, for me at least. That's the first memorial service I've been to.

It was great to see how many people love and appreciate my aunt. It really made me think about how I lead my life, which is pretty isolated. I suppose when you think about death, and things like that, you wonder who'd show up for you.

Would 100 people show up for ME? Not right now. I've been so focused on work and getting out of debt that I've lost touch with tons of people.

At one point in the event, when we were managing to laugh at a story about my uncle, I turned to my mom and said, "You know, I'd really like to have one of these remembrances. But I want to have mine while I'm alive, so I can enjoy it."

I suppose that a really wise person could look at every day as a chance to reach out and show people you care.

Why do we always seem to wait until it's too late?