The life of an artist, especially among other artists, is chaotic and ever evolving, as new projects come and go, each one unique both in its challenges and its rewards. So one needs to be able to adapt to ever changing realities, both specific to an individual project and also within the industry at large (which is changing rapidly), and deal with both success and disappointment in ever varying measures. As gracefully as humanly possible. Always developing, always moving forward.
So I make every effort to be stable and solid, consistent and morally upright, and, especially, loving and supportive as a person, amid all the chaos, so as to be the type of person friends, family, business partners, creative collaborators, peers, employees and assorted crew members, et al, can all rely, can trust, can believe in. (But never too serious, always the first with a joke, even at my own expense.)
It is a very rewarding life and career, albeit at times exhausting, and it is a distinct privilege to roll with the brilliant and amazing creative souls in my extended film/TV/music universe. I am grateful for one and all.
The embarrassment of good fortune continues with the three perfect children I have helped raise (the younger two being the fruit of my own loins), the product of a tumultuous 14 year relationship that has since ended, over now for a year and a half.
Although never married, the arrangement is akin to a very amicable divorce, where the children live most of the time with their very loving, hugely capable mother. And hang out with their not strict enough, big old softy of a Dad on alternate weekends and the occasional holiday/vacation. (The oldest, who was 6 years old when all that started, is in college now!)
They are impossibly great (a 13 year old boy and 8 year old girl), and I cherish the quality time I get with them amid all the travel and production mayhem relating to my career. There is no bitterness in the arrangement, no drama outside of the usual day-to-day, no villain in the storyline whatsoever. All good.
But there is a distinct absence of a significant other. A rather significant missing piece, as it were. And although I am not looking to jump into something serious quickly, and am loathe to introduce anyone new to my kids until there was a real and lasting bond that had been formed, I am out in the world looking for someone to treat very well, to share in the adventure, to take along some of these travels. And get the growth, often unexpected and unpredictable, that comes from absorbing all that comes from their experiences, their friends, their world. As it seems like a bit of a waste of all this time, expense and effort to experience this life alone.
As a person, I am big and physically strong, and can be a bit of an imposing figure in my leadership role, but in reality I am a total cuddly teddy bear type, well known -- nay infamous -- for the best hugs known to man or woman. And am generous in giving them. (Trust me, they are worth it.)
Although I work in the Chelsea area of Manhattan, and all my usual haunts are in lower Manhattan (with a bit of Brooklyn), along with most of my friends (although I have many in LA and around the world)... I actually live in a large house in Rockland county (about 20 miles north of the city -- essentially west of Westchester on the other side of the Hudson river) and commute during the week in my car. On my own ever flexible schedule (being the boss and all that), very often staying quite late in the city, either working, playing or both.
I may end up getting an apartment in the city, as well, but haven't really felt the need, especially as I very much like to drive and have made this same loop for the last decade-plus.
But having the house affords the opportunity to escape the city on weekends, with an amazing kitchen in which to cook (which I love to do, both for someone and with someone) and especially in the spring and summer to entertain, with the pool, BBQ, all the amenities and plenty of room for guests. Pretty kick ass arrangement, although underused at present.
I am a city person at heart, but grew up a suburbanite, so I enjoy taking those comforts as well. With the means and desire to also get out in the country and travel the world. Basically, to do it all.
Although I try to get enough exercise (and have a home gym), that process waxes and wanes, as schedule and will power allows, and despite a great love of the outdoors, I am not "outdoorsy". I am not a camper, skier, scuba diver, bike rider, rock climber, hunter, fisherman -- any of that -- although walks (be they city or country) and nature/sight seeing hikes can be quite lovely. The "walk and talk" is an essential part of any man/woman dialog, and the more interesting and beautiful the locale the better. For instance, I particularly like the tropics, but more at night, as I am Irish and go from pale to burned without a middle step and therefore am not a sun worshiper. But the sound of the ocean with a drink in your hand and a woman on your arm and the sand under your feet is pretty special.
And I am not big on thrill seeking/dangerous activities, not an adrenalin junkie, so I don't ride motorcycles or ATVs or horses, sky dive, skateboard, bungee jump, cliff dive, drive my car like a lunatic, whatever, I don't even ride roller coasters any more. I hold none of those things against a person, however, and quite frankly many attractive folks love all that stuff. No worries. Just don't be disappointed if I avoid all that.
Call me boring, but I like to get my thrills in other ways, from emotion and imagination, from film, music, theater, art and basic human interaction -- be it storytelling among peers, partying among friends or rolling around with your special lady. Even a great meal can be exciting, especially if you prepared it yourself for people you care about.
Anyway, I have avoided "dating services" my whole life, as part of me feels it shows a lack of faith in the fates looking after all of us. But perhaps fate lies now in these new technologies? Maybe what is meant to be can be found here on OKC?
Who knows. I sure don't. But I wish you all well.
Much love to all.