Find better matches with our advanced matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

MisterGoodthing

26 M Los Angeles, CA

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 8:31am
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
Asian, Middle Eastern, Black, Native American, Indian, Pacific Islander, Hispanic / Latin, White, Other
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Fit
Diet
Mostly vegetarian
Smokes
No
Drinks
Not at all
Drugs
Religion
Agnosticism, and laughing about it
Sign
Education
Dropped out of Ph.D program
Job
Art / Music / Writing
Income
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Open relationship
Relationship Type
Mostly non-monogamous
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, and doesn’t want any
Pets
Has dogs and has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Latvian (Okay), Yiddish (Fluently), Afrikaans (Okay), Tagalog (Poorly)

Similar Users

My self-summary
I'm a polyamorous photographer. I regularly have a beard. I have tattoos. I live in West Hollywood. I have a dog. I have many leather-bound books and my apartment smells of rich mahogany.

There are other cool things about me too. You should probably ask.

Instagram: @DarlingtonSwink

Check out my website DarlingtonSwink.com
What I’m doing with my life
Gettin' mad likes on Facebook, yo.

I've been pursuing some rather ambitious fitness goals recently (how LA) and I would love to find a girl who wants to hike, take yoga classes, do pilates, go to the beach, take pictures etc. Fit women are a big turn on for me.

Edit:
I thought the above statement was tactful enough, but the point seems to have been lost... No fatties. Sorry. Don't waste your time.
I’m really good at
-Glib online dating profiles.
-Looking away from the camera.
-Accidentally growing a beard.
The first things people usually notice about me
My silver tongue, facial hair, and my collection of nerdy tattoos.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Writers/Artists:
Chuck Palahniuk, George Orwell, Heinlein, Orson Scott Card, Michael Crichton, Sam Shepard, Brad Neely, Jhonen Vasquez, Frank O'Hara, Bukowski.

Photographers (because you care):
Tyler Shields, Ted Emmons, Terry Richardson, Richard Avedon, Ralph Eugene Meatyard, Kyle Thompson.

TV:
Futurama, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, The Venture Bros., Lost, South Park, Archer, Always Sunny, Wilfred.

Movies:
Fight Club, Old Boy, Wizard People, Dear Reader, Lo, Requiem for a Dream, Anchor Man.

Music:
Flogging Molly, Die Antwoord, Kanye, Rilo Kiley, Gorillaz, Explosions in the Sky, The Beatles, The Mountain Goats, Eisley, ALL THE SHOW TUNES, Eminem, Lupe Fiasco, LCD Soundsystem, Passion Pit, Crystal Castles, AWOLNATION, Regina Spektor, Queen, Mika, The Decemberists, X-Ray Spex, The Postal Service, The Dresden Dolls, Johnny Cash, Social Distortion, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah!, Pulp, Pink Floyd, Tom Waits, Violent Femmes, Cut Copy... And so much more.
The six things I could never do without
A camera, art, sex, redbull, friends, animals.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I've been on OKC a while. Here's how I see our romantic encounter playing out:

-We'll play OKC tag, where we keep visiting one another's profile but not initiating communication.

-One of us will FINALLY work up the nerve to message the other.

-Based on perceived chemistry, mood, or lack of attractiveness (I'm shallow, sorry 'curvy' girls...), the receptive party probably won't reply.

-If a reply occurs, the conversation will most likely burn out within 3 messages. I'll decide you're desperate, you'll decide I'm weird. Whatever.

-If we somehow magically get past the third message, the number exchange can potentially occur, usually accompanied by a "you don't seem like a stalker/serial killer" joke, depending on the gender of the number offering party.

-We will text a bit, and it will usually fall flat.

-Oh my gosh, the conversation didn't fall flat!? Let's make plans for a date! Someone will probably cancel. (Note: this one is usually the female's fault)

-If an actual date occurs, 3 things can happen: 1) ONE NIGHT STAND! (very common for OKC, women love to hit it and quit it with dudes from the internet); 2) No chemistry (also very common on OKC, people lie... a lot. I'll think you're fat, you'll realize that I'm not actually a mixed race millionaire); or 3) We are actually legitimately interested in one another! Congratulations to us! We are attractive, interesting, and intelligent human beings! Woot woot!

-We make plans for a second date. You probably cancel. I don't tollerate a flake.

-Wow, we made it through multiple dates? Hurrah! We're now in that awesome phase where we see one another for a bit and realize how awkward it is to explain to friends that we met on the internet.

-Eventually stop seeing one another, usually within a month. Probably because I won't let you peg me (sorry ladies). We will both return to The ADHD Theatre of the Genitals that is internet dating.

-We both go have a questionable one night stand with some stranger we meet on OKC after the "breakup".

-Eventually get tired of the constant stream of meaningless sex and find someone to date on POF.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 23–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
You're comfortable with polyamory and what it entails. Seriously, read up on it before talking to me.

You'd like to collaborate on some art.

You have an interesting nose. Girls with unique noses kill me. I will fall in love. You have been warned.

You aren't a flake. I am a freelance photographer, so any time I dedicate toward meeting you is time I am taking away from working. Please be respectful.

You're a redditor.

We have an 85% or higher match rating. Lower ones never work out. I have serious faith in the OKC matchmaking algorithm.

You're a gothy, dark, brooding, nerdy, artistic hippie type. If you have colored hair, tattoos, piercings in places other than your ears, want to read sad poetry to me in the dark while we cut ourselves and cry, wear dark makeup, like video games, sing show tunes, meditate, do yoga, etc. please apply.