Since the "hip" thing to do on dating profiles these days is to put a quote up, I think I'll do that, since I fancy quotes.
"And I think it's gonna be a long long time
Till touch down brings me round again to find
I'm not the man they think I am at home
Oh no no no I'm a rocket man
Rocket man burning out his fuse up here alone"
So, I guess this is the part where I talk about myself? If you've already made it this far on my profile, you're pretty awesome!
Okay, now, Before I begin, have you ever looked at your profile from a year ago and think to yourself, "I've changed!"? Yeah...This is one of those moments.
How are you doing today?
I'm what you may label as an undesirable.
My reign of terror began on a stormy November night 24 years ago.
I'm just trying to live life to it's fullest and succeed in a world that encourages failure.
I'm not sure what I'm doing on this site anymore. I'm not necessarily looking for anything, but I'm not not looking for anything either, if that makes sense. It might sound contradictory, but I do know what I want. I can tell you, that I DO NOT (I guess I have to put that in all caps, apparently) want a "hook-up", a "Wham! Bam! Thank You, Ma'am!", a "slap and a tickle", or whatever you people call it these days.
If you're looking for the Meyers-Briggs thing, stop now because you won't find any results here, and I really can care less if you're an IMFJ, an ABCD or an WXYZ for that matter.
I was born and raised in Ohio and I have moved around and lived in about a zillion places. I have been here in Washington since 1996.
I'm very ambitious, confident in myself and very competitive (Note: I said competitive. not insecure). I play to win, and I play to be the best. I don't give up, and I don't give in. I strive to do better and be better than I was yesterday. You are your biggest competitor. I've always thought outside of the box, and played the game by a different set of rules. I ask questions and I'm constantly asking myself, "why?" or "why not?" I've been called mature for my age, which is always a good thing. I take pride in not acting like people my age these days. Don't get me wrong, I'm definitely a kid at heart that loves having some fun. I'm good at drawing that line between work and play.
I'm extremely sarcastic and I'm a smart-ass. I have a dark sense of humor. I find myself laughing at all sorts of dark jokes, racist jokes, blonde jokes, you name it. If you're the type that gets easily offended, I'm not going to be the right fit for you. I find humor in a lot of things, I find myself laughing and smiling a lot (though, I'm not the biggest fan of my smile), even when I try not to. The reality of the situation is that if you aren't laughing, you're not living. That's just how I feel, anyways.
Some would describe me as laid back, and chill. I believe that to be true. It seems like some people my age like drama so much that it seems like they eat, breathe, and drink it. I'm not one for drama. I walk in a drama-free atmosphere.
I'm a semi nerd, geek, dweeb whatever you want to call it. I'm a tech buff, and I still enjoy some of the things I enjoyed when I was younger. If geeks aren't your thing, you should hit the back button.
I'm blunt, open and honest. I'm going to tell you exactly how it is, and I won't sugar coat anything. If you happen to get offended, then you just get offended. I keep everything 100. Why lie to someone? Lying and cutting corners are for kindergartners.
(↓*THIS IS PROBABLY THE PART YOU MIGHT WANT TO READ*↓)
I have never been the pretty boy of the bunch. I take care of myself, of course, but I'm not over 6 feet tall, I don't have blue eyes and blonde hair, and I don't look like Justin Bieber. I don't ever want to be the pretty boy, I'd rather be me. I'm comfortable in my own skin.
Your religious beliefs and your political beliefs are your business, not mine. I'm not one to force feed anything down anyone's throat. I don't judge based on beliefs and the like. I don't think these things define you 100%. Too many people are judgmental towards people that are different. I also don't mind if you happen to have kids, and I don't EVER refer to kids as baggage!
I'm an old-fashioned kind of guy. I'm not going to ask you for your number right off the bat, and I'm not going to talk about meeting you five minutes after the first message. I'm not going to blindly message you, either. If I message you, it's because I liked what you had to say, and I thought your profile was well written. You're going to have to do a little bit more than bat an eyelash for me to message you. What happened to fun, intelligent and friendly conversation? What happened to taking some time to get to know someone? Nowadays, everybody is trying to get in everyone's pants. So, hakuna your tatas. I'm not trying to get into yours.
I'm pretty ballsy and I've got guts. I believe Eleanor Roosevelt said it best, "Do one thing every day that scares you.” I stand my ground, and I don't take crap from anyone.
People fascinate me. I'm always looking to reach out to someone, I enjoy listening to people and their stories. I like knowing what makes an individual an individual. I think intelligence is sexy. Knowledge is power.
I think I'm done talking about myself in this section. If you'd like to know more, feel free to ask! Before you skip to the next section, I'll give you some random factoids about myself.
1. I'm somewhat shy.
2. My favorite fruits are Strawberries and Dragonfruit.
3. I'm awkward to a degree.
4. Gummi Candy will always be my first love!
5. Mountain Dew is the nectar of the gods.
6. I'm a sucker for a great smile.
7. Speaking of smiles, I tend to smirk a lot because I don't care for my smile.
8. I'm loyal to a fault.
9. I think the green M&Ms taste the best.
10. I handle criticism exceptionally well. Do your part and end the butthurt pandemic!
11. I'm open minded.
12. I'm a pretty good cook. I'll make food that's so good, you'll slap your mother! (That was a joke. Please no mother slapping, as I can't be held liable for what she might do to you).
13. The sorting hat has placed me in the house of Slytherin.
15. Tangled cords are my BIGGEST pet-peeve EVER. Right next to repeating myself, attention whores and one worded texts.
14. I purposely placed fact 14 here.
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