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I'm your basic (pfft!) intelligent, animal-lovin', (overly-) polite, careful, geeky, creative, recently-diagnosed INTJ (I'm a recovering INFJ; been feeling-free for about 4 months. Yea, me! Feelings suck!) stumbling blindly into his forties. I'm a goofball when the occasion allows (or can be made to allow), and my thoughts have tickets on several simultaneous trains - stay off those tracks, kid!

I enjoy crafting fiction and role-playing game material (RPG world building remains one of my favorite things to do), composing music, learning cool stuff, playing some video games here and there, checking out independent films, most things artsy and/or fartsy, shootin' pool (badly), board games (I am DYING for a good game of Beyond Balderdash!), and crap like that. Ya know - the usual for a quiet-ish geek.

I also enjoy traveling and seeing cool sights (Saint Petersburg, Russia is beautiful!), the odd indoor rock climbing here and there, good live music, and all that unremarkable stuff. With the synchronicity of mood, time, money and energy you might catch me in New Hope checking out a play or band or nice bit of cuisine, in Lancaster County enjoying the crazy back roads, or at a local pub sipping a fine microbrew. Join me for a cup o' joe or glass of dry wine, a slice of dill Havarti and a trip to somewhere nifty, especially if it's a cozy setting right out of a fairy tale - ruins, ancient trees, rivulets, verdurous overgrown paths and great glacial detritus - I'm all about it!

Alternately, if you'd like to build your own Tesla coil or robot or rocketship (or anything with fins), paint miniature figures (figs), plan world domination, become a superhero, visit Roswell or Champ or Mt Shasta, publish a book of utter nonsense, design the city of the future, make your own movie or engage in a contest of Monty Python quotes, you might find me in your basement or garage. Come to think of it, when was the last time you looked? Try behind the old TV Guides and box of oily rags.

Miscellany: I'm eating healthier these days. I sometimes cannot help doing bad impressions and accents. My nephew and nieces really seem to like me, presumably because I too am a child. I enjoy sleeping when I can actually do so - my dreams are always vivid, and sometimes come with a soundtrack and credits, so what's not to like? (I once thumbed through a book on dream interpretation to find the - ahem - "meaning" behind one in particular: I was a female shootist and marshal in the old west, being hunted over the plains by the revenants of six bad guys I had shot and/or brought to trial and seen hanged. The book said that dreaming of horses meant I would come into money. As yet I've not received a single Confederate cent from the grave. Funny, no interpretation for undead cowboys was forthcoming.)

Yes, I know - "I'm not even supposed to be here today." It was funny the first few hundred times. Now let it the fook go.

Still settling into the new digs after 4 months. Whew - restarting the furniture/decor drive blows. My place can't help but be mostly neat - I don't 'ave enough stuff to fill it!

Over the next year I'll have more purely "me time," and hope to use it to catch up on other things I enjoy doing, and which I hope will add to my list of "career options" - writing music (primarily but not exclusively orchetstral, for film, video games, Broadway and personal enrichment), web design (you'll eventually be able to check me out at monsmordium.com), and writing speculative fiction. And if I'm really REALLY lucky, making a movie, learning the art of Bonsai, and getting some gaming work published.

Update: I've started outlining an epic fantasy novel, with elements of high and dark fantasy and some crazy pulpy stuff thrown in to make me happy. Look for it in stores after we're all dead.

Update updated: I suck at outlining epic fantasy novels.

...sarcasm; writing, orchestrating and arranging music; teaching myself crap; overanalyzing; courtesy; curtsies; speling; PICK Basic (including UniVerse/UniData, etc.); procrastinating; misunderestimating; word puzzles and games; bullshitting, writing extensive but hollow profiles no one ever really reads all the way through.

...self-deprecation. Apparently VERY good. So good it's annoying, even to some who aren't me. I'm working on a gritty analysis of the phenomenon, and hope to write an autobiography regarding that work. But whom kid I - I can't write. My book on self-deprecation would suck.

Depends on the day. Normally it's my eyes, or it could be that I haven't shaved in a week. Or two. Starting my day with a blade to my throat seems counter-productive.

Oy.

My PC, with internet access and tons of memory and software, of course;

Music, especially the chance to write it/share it;

Covalent bonds, ATP and the various physics/chemistries that make this crap possible;

Sundry creative projects, with "sundry" being a key word - from furniture design/refinishing to gardening to model building, and everything around and between. I need variety like AA needs DD. Don't ask me to finish them without some (read as "a lot of") nudging, though.

Time with smart and witty folks;

I confess: a life without a luscious, complex marinara sauce (or gravy, if you prefer) would be meaningless.

...future creative projects, history, sciences, filmmaking, my day-to-day soul-devouring suck-ass work, politics, other socially-relevant spheres of philosophy, my own psyche, boobs (on occasion I actually do think about women, strange as that may seem to the women I know), gaming and campaign setting development, flora, fauna, what I'd do with my living space if I had the money, family (who are all getting older now, sadly), friends, how much Walmart and Exxon suck (got a personal boycott on them 15+ years strong), and what I can do to improve my own happiness in a way that doesn't conflict with my values or the happiness of others.

...depression, and the work required to overcome it to move on with Life.

Lately on my mind is how to balance liking things created or shaped by people I don't respect. I've always loved Charlton Heston movies, but he's not welcome for tea. Lovecraft's work is essential to my life, yet he was a racist (specifically, an antisemite). If I cut the work of these two assholes out of my existence, there'd be a palpable void. Any suggestions?

And latelier, what I've learned of my musicianship through recent exposure to Guitar Hero. GH plum tears me a new one. I wasn't aware of how much my sense of rhythm depends upon audio cues and a direct correspondence between what I do and what I hear back. The emphasis on the visual in that game leaves my head bangin', and not in a head-bangin' way. But at least it's got "Cult of Personality." Shweet.

I'm usually low-key and a bit of a homebody, at least for now while I'm getting my house (my "inside" house) in order. Chances are good that I'm home puttering around the apartment, working at my job (which I often do from home), not watering my plants, enjoying one of my leisure interests, watching TV, reading or just chillin'. But an opportunity for good conversation with good folks, a social gathering somehow focused on one of my interests/hobbies, a nice microbrew, some quality live music in a relaxed setting, a cool indie flick or a road trip can occasionally pull me out-of-doors for some Friday festivities.

In the name of all that's holy, let the boy hang out with you!

...that when it comes to relationships, it's 90% "us" and 10% "the other person," no matter who you are or what the issue. Weak, dude. That's not to say that you are 90% responsible for problems, nor even 50% sometimes, but that the choices that got you there and keep you there are really yours. Really. Yours. But you live, you learn, you grow. I hope.

...that my underwear collection includes duckie boxers.

...I just picked up Ulysses and wonder how someone so obviously autistic and inarticulate became the author of one of the great works of literature. I suspect James Joyce is actually an infinite number of monkeys, less one out on a 420.

...I can't type.

...you:

...are a smart and nifty nerd or geek or similar non-psychotic fringe-flavored human who's perfectly purpley perched on that sweet spot between confidently being that non-mainstream person you are and still not freaking out the poor, defenseless mundanes and muggles. You can let the geek flag fly and not be a dork (or jerk) about it;

...are a scientist, artist, musician, gamer, teacher, craftmonger, video game enthusiast, peasant, pauper, poet, pirate, pawn, regent, or some permutation/combination thereof;

...appreciate animals to the point of crying over roadkill, but don't understand what people get out of pet fish, spiders or snakes;

...read music and dig many musical genres;

...can edu-pah-cate me on cool crap. Any cool crap will do;

...LARP, want to encourage me to do so, and won't be disappointed if I just can't jump that fence (though I'll make props and stuff with you all weekend);

...like to engage in deep and usually masturbatory debates about how to improve the human condition if only everyone were as smart as we, which, obviously, they aren't;

...can correct my spelling and grammar without being a total dick(ess) about it (one of my best friends is a stickler for these things, and she usually manages to point out my mistakes in a very nice and cool way - you rock, Nyneve922!);

...read or write speculative fiction of any genre;

...boast a wickedly diverse (and perverse) sense of humor and yaw to the left, allowing you to bust a gut over stuff like South Park, The Whitest Kids You Know, Always Sunny in Philadelphia, Code Monkeys, etc., while not buying into any of the "-isms" about up which your shit has just cracked;

...'ve got a passion for Bosch;

...'ve got a passion for fashion. A craving for saving can't hurt, either;

...feel a disturbance in the Force, one that compels you to write;

...possess an artefact of any sort. Yes - "artefact;"

...realize Darwin was right, Creationism is wrong, and that there are other possibilities that aren't either;

...ya feel me (but not me bum. Cheeky monkey! Bum looker!);

...want to collaborate with a composer or web guy or writer or thinker on some creative project. Hey, I got your Flash right here!

...realize that Superman can't beat the Hulk in a straight-up fight but could certainly destroy him through some other means;

...would like to debate that point;

...will be at Philcon in November 2008;

...think the choice of what to bracket here is a form of comedy;

...need more cowbell.

I'm open to local folks with whom I can hang and see what develops, and maybe more distant net-buddies or networking buddies with whom I can stay in casual contact. It would be really sweet to find a cool English-speaking chick overseas for a good old-fashioned snail mail penpal thing.

Felony conviction? Still in prison? Bad credit? No credit? No citizenship? No car? No cash? NO PROBLEM! At Monsmordium, we don't discriminate! Come on down and see what WE can do - for YOU!