Turn-ons: Loud music, hooded tops, skeletons, masks, shallow graves, Santi Cazorla, 420, cartoons, Joanna Lumley, screaming, your mother.
Turn-offs: Daylight, people, cops, Arsene Wenger, weak rope, police dogs, helicopters, your father.
My sexiest feature? Probably my compassion. Or my tenacity. Or the fact my chest is hairless and as clean as a tub of Sudocrem.
My Myers-Brigg type is BAMF.
Working with computers also enables me to participate in 3 of my greatest passions on a daily basis; sitting down, surfing the internet and shouting at inanimate objects. It also enables me to download high-definition pornography at around about 30Mbps and maintain a 24/7 connection to World of Warcraft.
Geek jokes upset me and I do not get turned on by technological advancements, although this might change when they finally design a robot that gives the perfect blowjob while streaming live Arsenal matchs on a HUD.
I'm sad to say I've had to take a second job in these austere times and so have recently started selling speed & mephedrone to the school kids around here. Business is pretty good, so good infact that I've had to start cutting in rat-poison & household cleaners so I don't run out. I've also started sniffing glue down at the playing fields and mugging elderly people with my boys in the ASDA car-park crew.
not returning calls.
making unfunny jokes/writing bad profiles.
Later, they will notice my ass, which is fantastic. I like to keep it in shape by sitting down as much as possible and doing absolutely nothing.
Ask me about my love for Kool Keith & Kriss Kross. I love checking out new bands and genres, and get hyped about discovering awesome musicians I've never heard of before.
I've also played guitar on and off for about 15+ years now and have a mini-studio setup at home which is pretty awesome.
Music's always a good conversation topic with me because I can talk for hours about gigs/festivals & bands I love and even longer about those I hate. If you're the same I'm sure we'll get on great :)
One Directions address