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MrMandible

27 / M / straight / Single

Brooklyn, New York

The Skinny

Last Online
Join Date
Ethnicity
White
Height
6' 0" (1.82m).
Body Type
Thin
Looking For
New friends, Long-term dating, Short-term dating, Activity partners, Long-distance penpals, Casual sex
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Never
Religion
Agnosticism but not too serious about it
Sign
Taurus but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from college/university
Job
Unemployed
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Kids
—
Pets
Owns dogs and Likes cats
Languages
English (Fluently), German (Okay), Japanese (Poorly)

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Your Notes

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I am disquieting, resilient, and benignly neurotic.

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My Self-Summary

I'm a failed writer, a semi-recent college graduate and I shaved off the mustache shown above last year. I've also dropped fifty pounds, and perhaps a new photograph is therefore in order.

As a failed writer who studied his so-called craft in college, I have written many of these self-summaries but this night is different from all other nights for it is one upon which I am attempting to use my self-summary to attract women. I have trouble attracting people, I do not think that this is a major selling point.

I enjoy food, obvious jokes and ideas for their own sake.

I moved to Brooklyn in January, if this changes anything.

What I’m doing with my life

My temp gig went perm about a year ago and so I'm doing that for eight hours a day. I quit Brazilian Jujutsu after the crotch of my pants split in the middle of class. Actually, I got a new pair and attended about five more classes but the magic was gone.

I’m really good at

Writing once I actually get started. Pulling a related fact out of my ass in a good sixty, seventy percent of situations.

The first things people usually notice about me

In the winter, most people notice I'm not wearing a coat (beyond the temp assignment-mandated sportjacket) as my fat is capable of insulating me. Other similarly-obese people claim that this is not a valid reason as they are cold despite their tonnage. As my weight continues to drop, we shall allow science to take its course.

My favorite books, movies, music, and food

a)Bigot Hall by Steve Aylett

b)The Big Lebowski or Happiness

c)Anything Harvey Danger has ever recorded

d)Thai, Indian, Szechuan, basically any cuisine that makes you sweat without having to exercise. Honorable mention to bacon, gazpacho and any sandwich named after a nationality (Vietnamese Sandwich(or Banh Mi if you must be authentic), Cuban sandwich, Frankfurter sandwich).

The six things I could never do without

cholesterol, slumber, occasional solitude, masturbation (actual and metaphorical), text and, to my great surprise, human contact.

I spend a lot of time thinking about

Every significant mistake I've made since the age of four. Ideas for stories that I seldom write down and rarely expand beyond three paragraphs.

On a typical Friday night I am

Alone, unmourned and unloved.

The most private thing I’m willing to admit here

My cat died nearly four years ago and I'm still milking his corpse for sympathy on an online dating site.

You should message me if

You have a thing for guys who are about halfway between Seth Rogen and Jonah Hill.

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