Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
What did the vegetarian zombie say?
I find the dichotomous nature of life amusing. In one respect, I am
everything - beyond me there is nothing and the universe is
contained within me; in another respect, I am absolutely nothing,
not even a speck in comparison to the universe. Neither perspective
is wrong, one just makes me value my life and the other keeps me
I get paid to tell other people what you should be drinking, and
telling other people how to serve those drinks. I have been newly
appointed to a wine and liquor sales company, which means I am a
corporate man now, of sorts - I work Monday through Friday, and I
can actually plan my days and weekends now, which probably doesn't
mean much to most but it means everything to me. Somebodies
actually trust me enough to pay me to sell other people wine and
spirits, and well I might add. It's an interesting gig, with all
the free wine and liquor you can imagine as a perk. Dating me means
never having to spend a dime on booze - let me know when you're
I enjoy irony. I'm more likely to laugh than cry. I think life is
tragic and heart-wrenching, but kind of hilarious at the same time.
I like to put my head down and take one step at a time when I'm
working, but let it all hang out with my friends. I consider myself
a good person and I think most everyone I know would consider me
the same, but I'm aware of my failings too.
I think I might be human, but don't quote me on that. I think love
is a noble pursuit and I envy those who've found it.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Singing, writing, working out, trying not to go on a murderous
One of those I'm kidding about - you guess which!
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Wasting time on meaningless pursuits and picking out cute sneakers
- two mutually exclusive things.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I'm a smart-ass, more than likely.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Murakami, Garth Ennis, and Neil Gaiman.
The Road to Wellville. The Orphanage.
Otis Redding, The Beatles, Sam Cooke, Rilo Kiley/Jenny Lewis, Buena
Vista Social Club, 2Pac, Tool, The Mars Volta, Wu-Tang, The Police,
The Cure, Metric, MGMT, Placebo, Biggie, Snoop, The Pixies,
OutKast, The Misfits, Depeche Mode, Denali, A Perfect Circle, Ray
I like all different kinds, but I don't eat red meat and
consistency is the end-all of what I can and can't eat. Dim-sum may
be the grossest dining experience ever created... squishy and
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Soda water, coconut water, Yerba Mate, Kombucha, smoothies with
protein, and whiskey/beer.
Food I can take or leave, but drink is where it's at. "What the
fuck is juice?!?"
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Lately I think a lot about what I'm doing/will be doing with my
life, the moral and logistical ramifications of eating meat, and
what I should be saving up towards.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
If you can tell me what the outro lyrics are to ATHF are, and why
they're there, I'll basically love you.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I listen to jazz and read classic literature to fall asleep, every
When I was younger I was kneed in the balls so hard I had to go the
hospital. While being examined by the doctor, my mother came over
and told me some residents wanted to examine me as well - she
explained that while she understood that I was embarrassed, this
provided an important chance at real-world experience for the
I begrudgingly acquiesced, fully expecting two male
twenty-somethings (accompanying skin conditions probable), and what
I got were two Hollywood-hot female residents... two hot women
examining my now hastily retreating penis and testicles.
Two lessons learned that day: I should never give way mentally to
thinking along sexual norms, and I should never under any
circumstance listen to my mother.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
If you don't know the difference between your, you're, or use "ur"
in a completely non-ironic way, you probably shouldn't message me.
Same applies to their, there and they're. Please know the
difference - sincerely.
I like people who "get it." I think life might be a cosmic joke,
but if they're laughing at us I want to laugh right back. Forgive
the histrionics, but I honestly can't stand people who don't know
how to have a good time. I look to make the best out of situations
and I appreciate others who do the same.
Who are you looking for?
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