In 1872, Pinkerton's Detective Agency posted wanted posters from the slums of New Amsterdam to the bluffs of Hannibal, Missouri, all describing me as a dandified ne'er do well, a bit too fond of galavanting, quipping, two-stepping, and ten-paced duels. Since then I have tried with all due diligence and sincerity to improve my behavior and have failed miserably.

I have just moved back to the bay after a long hiatus. It's been eight strange years in Thailand, Taiwan, and the mountains of North Carolina--teaching, counseling, circus performing, running a nightclub.

Now I am restoring an old yacht with some friends of mine (the ultrafabulous ame_no_heisei and her manfriend zoro_a_kenkaku, learning how to sail and exploring the city a lot. I've been gardening and cooking excessively, making and collecting hot sauces, roasting and drinking a lot of coffee, mixing cocktails and doing yoga to compensate for my excesses. Some days I don my mild mannered everyman suit and work at an art store to fund my gluttonies.

Lebertanz!

No, really--many years ago (I dimly recall it being sometime during one of the deliciously hedonistic papacies in Avignon, but it might also have been some time in the late 90's) my friend speckmessias and I created the dance that subsequently spawned the culture of Lebertanzeren that you all know and love. The neo-folk practice of trying to ostentate the whereabouts of your liver while hopping up and down and shouting "Lebertanz!" was one of our most coveted discoveries. You've probably thought to yourself, while lebertanzing out on the town, "You know, I've never given much thought to this cornerstone of my social life, but someday I really would like to find whoever came up with this dance and kiss them square on the kisser." You have found him.

That I have a face.

Old Possum's Book of Practical Cats, T.S. Eliot with illustrations by Edward Gorey
George R. R. Martin's The Song of Ice and Fire series.
His Dark Materials, Phillip Pullman
The Scar, China Mieville
Catch-22, Joseph Heller
Geek Love, Katherine Dunn
Jorge Borges, Tlon, Uqbar, Orbis Tertius, Funes the Memorious, essays...ok, I love pretty much everything he's written.
Isabella Allende, The House of Spirits
Ben Okri, The Famished Road
Saki and his withering Victorian wit.
And I must admit a green, slimy soft spot for H.P. Lovecraft.

Graphic Novels: The Courtyard , Alan Moore
An Illustrated People's History of the U.S. Empire, Howard Zinn and others (Yes, I love the book, but I am pleased with this adaptation and hope it expands readership).
Deogratias, J.P. Stassen
Black Hole, Charles Burns
Bone, Jeff Smith
The Tragical Comedy of Mr. Punch, Neil Gaiman
Dave Mckean's collected short works

Music:
My current favorite band is Dengue Fever-- 70's style Cambodian psychedelic rock out of L.A. rules my little world.
Golgol Bordello
Circus Contraption
Just about anything with an accordion or toy piano in it
Siouxie Sioux
Creatures
Hot Chip
Beruit
Squirrel Nut Zippers
Magnetic Fields
The Gothic Archies
Future Bible Heroes
The Sixths
Stephen Merritt singing in the shower
Hammers of Misfortune
Prince
Raffi, who saved my hide on innumerable occasions when I taught kindergarten.

Movies:
Tekkonkinkreet
A Tale of Two Sisters
Little Miss Sunshine
Rape of Europa
A Death at a Funeral
The Devil's Backbone
Blue Velvet
Once Upon a Time in Mexico
Planet B-Boy (Yes, a documentary about break dancing. Yes, I laughed when I first heard of it. Yes, it's fucking fantastic.)

Food: I know that one shouldn't be able to make a definitive, superlative claim about any particular type of food. That being said, Thais make the best food on earth. Som tam, a raw papaya salad dish is manna from heaven.

Editors

• ame_no_heisei

Good food, good drink, love, laughter, sex and finely waxed mustaches.

Editors

• agwarin

Adventure, romance, sex, social justice, cocktails, the meaning of a meaningful existence, language, sex, circus freaks, capybara, travel, life, death, sex.

Expressing my scent glands on the dumpsters and telephone poles of the East Bay.

That would probably make you blush.

You are fun, kinky, crass and adventurous. You are a circus troupe missing it's sidewalk barker. You woke up one day and realized that you fell straight out of the 40's, landed here, and now sorely need more fedoras in your life. You make a beast of yourself to rid yourself of the pain of being human. You are betasexual. You are David Bowie. Seriously, David, why haven't you called me back?!!!

I am an unapologetic polyamorous person and am seeking like minded individuals when it comes to romance. I drink deeply from love's chalice, but I don't quaff, which, according to Terry Pratchett, would mean that I spill most of it. Open minded gluttons who haven't quite got the knack for jealousy, we should talk.
Hopefully you are queer or queer-friendly, and at least kink-curious. Being an all out nasty freak is a bonus. And if you can balance that with being kind and sincere, you win.

I've also heard about this rare phenomenon of people making platonic friends through dating websites. I am keen to try it. I'm pretty new to the area and am still assembling my posse before I can take on the sheriff. Whoa, slow down, tex. I said posse. I want to meet a cadre of cads who love knowledge in all of its artful guises, adventure, performance, travel, and plays on words. I love the circus, playing dress up, and doing things that might kill me but will be funny to talk about if they don't. Freaks, geeks, and bearded ladies--where are you?