Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
*This is in serious need of an update. Oh look! I seem to taking my
sweet time about it. I'll get to it... Or delete everything. Until
I do, be advised; information here may be wrong.
*2nd Update: I'm not going to devote my bank holiday to rewriting
all this. It's nice out. And at least now I don't have to rewrite
the bit about procrastination.
You're late.... Lucky I'm the caring sharing forgiving doormat
type. So you can just owe me one.
And while we're on the subject.... Drum roll..... Ta-da! Me - fun,
interesting, sexy, Waaaayy too modest for my own good, intelligent,
charming, sophisticated, wise, soulful, funny and cuter than a
bouquet of multi-coloured kittens. But you already knew that.
Did I mention I was modest?
Anyway, I love my virtues and my vices in equal measure and I enjoy
meeting people who are fun, creative and able to have a
conversation for more than just a few seconds without breaking into
And seeing as most of the attractive women I know are as
interesting as watching paint dry, I decided to give this online
dating thing a go as a last resort.
So if you're stunning, with looks to match and have lots of similar
friends in case it doesn't work out, then that's a good
Oh yes and I'm not funny. So no laughing... I don't want so much as
a giggle out of you for the duration of this profile.
And I should probably mention that I'm quite down to earth. Not
that I believe it myself after reading any of this back.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Moving forward. Seems to be working rather well too. Graduated with
a degree in dropping-out-cos-the-course-didn't-suite-me from
Nottingham university and never looked back. Amazing how something
like that matures you. I'd almost consider doing it again...
So right now I'm a casual martial arts coach and small time bar
wizard. Which is a start but I'm beginning to dream of much bigger
fish... As a result I'm constantly on the lookout for more
interesting people to connect with and broaden my horizons and fire
my creative side. Come to me my gurus! Teach me your secret sauce
Also learning bass to pass the time. Though it's going a little
slower than I'd like. So naturally I'm thinking of getting a
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
... Go on...
That's not going to work now I think about it. Sigh.
Other talents include dancing, flying kicks, helping old ladies
cross the road and knowing when it's an appropriate occasion for
each. In addition I'm an international kazoo virtuoso...
I'm ok at creative writing and not taking things too seriously too
but you were already beginning to suspect that. Oh look I can read
And let's not forget procrastination. I'll tell you about that some
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Look at my pic and tell me...
See? Not rocket science is it?
(If you looked and still can't tell I recommend an eye test.
And no you can't touch it. You haven't even introduced yourself
Actually it would be a relief if for once someone shamelessly
objectified anything else about me.
True story time (I hope you're sitting comfortably)
Someone told me they really liked my eyes and I was forced to give
up my hatred of cliche on the spot. It's still my third favorite
compliment of all time four years later.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
There's so much that I could write here so I'll summarize...
If something is created with exquisite care, burns and throbs with
raging passion, is full of runaway imagination and lovingly imparts
the deep, deep wisdom of the ages... I will put it on a fresh
buttered bagel and eat it without a moments pause.
Note that truly classic works of art should be eaten with careful
attention to comic timing... And a mug of hot chocolate.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Six essentials for living.... 5 a day....
Hells bells that only leaves 1.
Sushi or chocolate milk?... Sushi or chocolate milk?... Sushi or
Blast you Question writer!!!....
Oh no I forgot about cake!
I give up.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
I'm not sure it has a name... but I think it's accompanied by the
Benny Hill theme music...
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
I work in a bar...
It's just a temporary thing until I get my super hero license and
get to start fighting crime.
Either way I'll be working unsociable hours.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I would say I'll give you a clue... providing you're on your best
But you'll have to earn my trust to get the good stuff. And no,
looking at my profile and asking doesn't quite cut it.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You're more than just mascara and lip gloss... Though these do have
some merits if you have a little character to go with them.
Just be honest, elegant, independent, artistic, savvy, coy,
reckless, magic, talented, confident, stylish, deep, playful,
hilarious, passionate, spiritual, outrageous, powerful, flirty,
adventurous, curious, vibrant, enthusiastic and inspirational as
well as filthy rich and, for preference, freakishly ticklish.
Come on Kitten. I know you can do it...
I believe in fairies!!!!!.....
But seriously, If you've got a few of those then I bet we'd get
along just fine. You don't need a PHD just the spark of a mind that
can figure out how to tie it's own shoe laces and remember where
the keys are in the same morning.
If you think you can teach me something fascinating or show me
things that would move me to applause by all means tell me... If
you think you can handle saying "Hi" of course...
Let's see if you're brave enough for that to start with...
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