Find better matches with our advanced
matching system

—% Match
—% Enemy

Nat_Hornblower

41 New York, NY Man

Man

I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 30–37
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating

My Details

Last Online
Sep 2
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Mostly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Often
Drugs
Religion
Catholicism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Leo, but it doesn’t matter
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Banking / Finance
Income
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Pets
Likes cats
Speaks
English (Fluently), Yiddish (Okay)

Similar Users

My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
(If you know anything about chess then consider this to be a Benoni opening)

Show me a woman who is the product of parential love and has the virgin innocence of replicating such love and if there is real chemistry I will show you a Man...or Manhattan if there isn't chemistry of the biological kind.

Speaking of virgins, I'm am the reason why Madonna had to abruptly end her "Like A Virgin" tour and to forgo wearing white at all of her weddings. And yes, that claim pre-dates her marriage to Sean Penn.

So if you are too young to know about Madonna's Virgin tour or marriage to Sean Penn (hey, I'll date young) then just know that Christine Agueliera had no clue about how to hit a C over a high E until she met me...in the bedroom. But that's another story. And if you are so young that you only know who Lady Gaga is (and/or don't have a clue about how to relax your gag reflexes) then lose my email because I don't date THAT young.

So besides that, I am just 100% pure unadulterated man who is a shrewd lewd dude who enjoys a bit of the crude but without the rude.

But in case you were lured here because you saw the name "Hornblower" and thought I was related to the Vanderbilts, I am sorry to burst your bubble as I am referring to Adam Yauch from the Beastie Boys.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I have taken to prayer. Every day, I pray that Belladonna, the porn star, will divorce her husband. As the Jewish grandmother I never had used to say "Oy Vehhhhh!"

I'm also trying to follow my two New Year's resolutions which are 1) to stop being so goddamn handsome and 2) to be a lot more modest. I'll let you be the judge of how I am progressing with those goals. If you say I'm handsome and also a handful, then you probably get my vibe and we should get along.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Pleasing women. For instance, I'm very good at being on top...of the news.

I also LOVE to get down and dirty...when I vaccum under my couch.

I'm also really good at getting women hot...after turning up the heat in my apartment.

I'm also really good at being chivalrous, helping old ladies across the street, showering females with attention, being a great listener and taking gaggles of ladies to the latest greatest restaurants. And finally, on the rarest of rare occasions, I'm also "ok" with being sarcastic.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
is I'm actually a lot more serious about life, love and relationships than most people expect me to be...once they sign a pre-nup.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Favorite book: Women are from Venus, Men are from Your Anus
Favorite movie: The Sisterhood of Traveling Pantyhose
Favorite Magazine: Cooking Light in a Meth Labb
Favorite show: Annie Sprinkle Live
Favorite music: 70s porno music, duh (is this a real question?)
Favorite food: chocolate, oysters, Spanish Fly and other aphrodisiacs
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
I can actually do without a lot of material items. What I refuse to do without is settle on a life partner who cant laugh at life's's absurbities and to be moved by it's grace and to accept we are here to make sacrifices for the next generation cause thats where the fun begins. If you aren't honest with your own true carnal desires then I wish you luck reading Emily Dickinson.

So, on that note, what I could never do with is/are:

1)selfish people who think compassion is spelled with a u and is a compound word.
2)people who marry for the sole reason of having kids
3)a future date with a future wife in divorce court (where is the future in that?)
4) people who fail to see point 1 plus point 2 leads to point 3
5) a lover who thinks swallow is just a bird and deepthroat is just a character in All the President's Men
6) people who don't understand comedy is nature's way of making the uncomfortable comfortable
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
That legumes are sexy because:
Legume= me+u+leg

That a relationship is the product of what both people put into it.

The irony of being a prisoner in New Hampshire and making license plates with the state motto of "Live free or die."

That the most unattractive word to hear from a promising relationship is the word "no". That word defeats the attempt for an open and honest connection.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
trying to imbibe a three letter word that starts with an "a" and in crossword puzzle cirlces is referred to as "beer's cousin".

The answer is "ale".
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
In my heart lies an optimist, in my tax returns lies a minimalist.

Anyone who serves a Ceasar salad followed by a vol-au-vent doesn't have a clue to what they are doing in the kitchen.

I don't consider Doug Henning a real entertainer.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you believe from small acorns grow mighty oaks (hey, I need to grow it in order to show it), you aspire to be the Kielbasa Queen, you got past your initial reaction that I'm the south end of a horse facing north and you kept reading and/or you realized that my profile is better than the last guy's . (BTW, I know that dude and while I have nothing against him personally, rumor has it he has crabs. Of course, you didn't hear it from me so don't hate the player just hate the game.)

But seriously, if you want to write, write. I'm an open guy so the Wink and Quiver stuff just seems silly to me. Of course, I would rather just walk up to someone, drop a humor bomb, and introduce myself. Nevertheless, I accept the fact that we are all limited to who we meet due to our daily routines and responsibilities. Thus, if you put some thought into a note, I will treat it with respect and write back accordingly...or send you a photo of my rooster!