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24 M Astoria, NY

My Details

Last Online
Today – 12:02am
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body Type
When drinking
Graduated from university
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids

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My self-summary
My body converts pizza directly into seratonin. I write and sing and play things when I'm not writhing in bed thinking about sandwiches.

I never close my mouth in photos.
What I’m doing with my life
Day job in an office where I drink a lot of coffee and then rip off my shirt like spiderman to reveal a jumpsuit and go play in a band.

I also write screenplays and do a column for a website and eat foods that most people think of as an act of self-harm. You know. Just burnin. Doing the neutron dance.
I’m really good at
Being enthusiastic!
Jack Nicholson eyebrows.
Mixing metaphors like a cat in a hot coal mine.
The first things people usually notice about me
Usually my glasses or the fact that I move like a cursed scarecrow from a folktale, but don't take my word for it! Here are some direct quotes from the clientele of a Taco Bell deep in the butthole of Maryland:

"Go back to chess club!"
"Hey Elvis, can we get an autograph?"
"Well well well, looks like the comic convention just got out."
"We don't serve goths."
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: I'm actually a writer. I wrote The Notebook. And if you hate the notebook, I wrote it ironically.

Movies: Ghostbusters. Back(s) to the Future. Velvet Goldmine. Purple Rain. Pacific Rim. The Life Aquatic. Alien. Aliens. Predator. Predators. Stripes. Jaws. Fright Night (Both). The Lost Boys. Bill Murray, Cronenberg, Lynch, Del Toro, Rodriguez, Tarantino, Anderson, Spielberg.

Shows: Probably all the ones you like- Mad Men, Breaking Bad, Game of Thrones, It's Always Sunny, 30 Rock, Parks and Rec- This is just what we all watch now, right? If you like Squidbillies or MST3k then let's party.

Music: The Darkness, Foxy Shazam, Prince, The Donnas, Deap Vally, Ramin Djawadi, The A's, Sweet, ABC, The Jim Jones Revue, David Bowie, Queen, T. Rex, King Tuff, Cheap Trick, Bauhaus, Iggy and the Stooges, The Kinks, Depeche Mode. Currently obsessing over The Cars.

Food: I like junk food, I like fancy food. Food is art. And like with art, I will eat the equivalent of Rock of Love with the same enjoyment that I take in some Kurosawa. Currently dreaming about Buffalo Chicken Cheesesteaks from where I grew up. With mozzarella sticks on it. Gin, Whisky and Black Coffee form another important food pyramid.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
"Van Halen has been touring with a big banner that says 'Screw David Lee Roth.' How does that make you feel, David?"

"Aw, well. They can keep on rainin- I'm gonna keep on bein' the parade."
On a typical Friday night I am
Working on some Night Moves, setting my computer to autocorrect "Okcupid" to "Seamless" and sexting a delivery guy
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
the new shit for 2014 is getting a little collapsible telescope and wearing it on a necklace.

MSG me for real Kenny Loggins playlists that will blow your shit up
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 22–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, short-term dating
You should message me if
You want to talk! I like articulate people and the unflinchingly enthusiastic.




You can teach me how to program synthesizers


You're down to karaoke "DANGER HIGH VOLTAGE" by Electric 6. I'll even let you be Jack White.