I've got an awesome husband, (AnUpwardSpiral) and he's not going anywhere. I'm not looking for "a bit on the side", and I'm not looking for cheaters.
I also have an awesome boyfriend, (prodigal_pun). My time is precious and limited, at this point. You may have to abide some spontaneity.
It's called ethical non-monogamy. Deal with it. Or don't. Who am I to tell you how to live your life? I'm just a stranger on the Internet.
Also, I continue to reinforce the non monogamous stereotype of being overweight. Though maybe that's just an American stereotype these days.
Important sexual information, because people seem confused. If you believe a frank discussion about sexual preferences is presumptuous or it makes you uncomfortable, then you should probably jog on:
I'm confirmed vanilla. This is who I am. Many people are vanilla because that is all they know or they are afraid of sex or kink. I'm sex positive and believe that there is nothing immoral or gross about what consenting adults choose to do to themselves or other consenting adults.
Do not confuse vanilla with boring.
Do not confuse vanilla with "missionary only, with the lights off".
All vanilla means is that props, power dynamics, playing a role, and intentional infliction of pain are not what do it for me.
If you believe that vanilla means I'm judging your kink, then you haven't been paying attention. All it means is that I won't be joining you on kink adventures - but will certainly encourage you to have those adventures with others!