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30 Redhill, UK Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 20–45
  • Located anywhere
  • For new friends

My details

Last online
May 5
5′ 11″ (1.80m)
Body type
Mostly anything
Other, and very serious about it
Libra, but it doesn’t matter
Graduated from high school
Rather not say
Seeing Someone
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
Most original message wins a cookie, or any message wins a cookie, you know what, fuck it, cookies for all.

I like to think I am a funny guy, I mean I am not, quite the opposite in fact so though I try to crack a joke and try to make people laugh I often fall short, so it comes across as if I am just spouting random nonsense which is not the intent, well it was what I meant to do but only to elicit a laugh, my lack of humour is theorised to be the reason I don't tend to keep friends for long, it's a shame really.

I like to make things, the only problem with this is that I have no inherent talent and things I make tend to disappoint, but this doesn't stop me, sometimes we have to make something we know is doomed to fail.

I add things to my profile as I do along, so tomorrows profile will be longer than today and next weeks profile will be long than tomorrows.
If you don't get around to reading my profile any time soon you might find it has gotten far too long for you to read through.

I'm the best there is at what I do, if I can work out what that actually is then I will let you know.

I'm a zombie obsessed film geek who has a thing for steampunk, mainly for the sense of adventure I guess, I think the world is too safe and too boring but adventure is where you make it and I do try to have an adventure when possible.

I had absolutely no idea what to use for my screen name so picked something random, just the same way as I've no idea wha to respond with the various questions and what not, figured I'd just be as honest as I can and try not to kick anything on my way.

I used to have really odd dreams, I still do on occasion, the last dream I remember was quite active, I remember thinking to myself "Thank god I'm dreaming, I just hope I'm not hitting anything outside this dream.." Needless to say I had attacked nothing in my night time convulsions, but it was fun.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I'm planning to take over the world, one step at a time.
I'd love to make short movies for youtube, but I have neither friends or financing for such things, oh well.
I do have plans, I mean there are things I want in life but I am just not one to talk about them, I'd rather wait until I've done something with my life before I talk about what I am doing.
Right now I am hiding a couple of appropriate song lyrics into my profile, if you can find the names of the songs, you win a cookie.

I think it's not so much about what I am doing, but what I want to do, I currently do a lot of things and this can not be helped but I want to do more.
I wish there was more of a world to explore, as such many of my interests revolve around the exploration of the hidden world, that sounds a lot more dramatic than it actually is, but what I want to do is create.
I like to make things and I think it would be awesome to create an Alternate Reality Game, feel free to google it or better yet ask me about it, I'll give you the quick tour of an ARG.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
My super power is draining fun from parties.
Making people laugh, just don't think I am so funny in a profile, I am much funnier in a day to day conversational way.
I make no promise to make you laugh however, I am not a performing monkey, I'm just a monkey in shoes.

I am under-educated and over-opinionated, I collect opinions, ranging from "That's cool" through to "Would not eat again, I imagine this to be what poop tastes like", my under-educatedness leads to my next point.
I excel at sounding as if I know what I am talking about, a mixture of a "well to do" accent (despite being common as muck), good choice of words and a little knowledge and I can pass for reasonably academic.
Not that I go around intending to make people think I am smarter than I happen to be, I'm just naturally good at giving off that impression.
Although for two years I took part in a volunteers technical help desk, every problem I solved using google-fu. HAH, take that brain!

I'm also good at talking even if I don't talk a lot, that is not to say I lack practise, I just practise the good words if there is such a thing, and I ramble, sometimes when I am nervous or don't know what to say but most of the time because I am tired and "HAI YOU GUISE!" isn't enough to start a conversation.

One thing I've noticed over the years is that I can teach pretty much anything to anyone, even when I don't know what I am teaching. I call this the lucky ignorant phenomenon, I can rock the not knowing of things.

I am also really good, and I mean really good at quoting things.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I've no idea, it's not really a question I ask people when we meet, usually I just scuffle my boots in the dust and try not to be noticed, which works out pretty well for me, I mean as well as being a guy with long hair can work out for you.

Scratch that, it's probably the hair, I'm a dude with long hair and a beard, not that you can't be a dude without a beard but I am specifically a dude with long hair and more accurately the occasional beard.

Just once I'd like someone to turn to me and go "Ah! Nice shoes" not because I wear particularly nice shoes, but because I think that would be cool starting point.
Yes, I do comment on peoples shoes when I meet them.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Piers Anthony, Robert Rankin, Terry Prachett. HP Lovecraft, George Mann.
Preacher, Green Lantern, Wolverine.

Breakfast Club, Reach the Rock, Mallrats, Jackie Brown, 1408, Con Air, Night of the Living Dead.

Arrested Development, Invader Zim, Firefly, Fist of the North Star, Firefly, Community, Eerie Indiana, Inspector Spacetime

Ramones, Offspring, Nirvana, Voltaire, Stabbing Westward, Mindless Self Indulgence, Tim Minchin, Marian Call, Foo Fighters, Dr. Steel, Sixteen Horsepower, Muse, Meatloaf, Out Lady Peace, Bush, Marcys Playground, SR-71, B52's, Johnny Cash, Head Automatica, Dax Riggs.

I am always open to new media, if you know a movie, tv show or band you think I might like, just let me know and I will get it.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Coffee, my tablet, my phone, which makes me sound like the most pretentious ass that ever existed, I am also attached to my juggling balls and my belt, how else would I keep my jeans off the floor?
I'd love to be able to say I'm a survivalist and all I need is a sharp knife and a sturdy pair of boots, but hell with that, I'm all about the making people laugh and relaxing.
That and I can't see the current need for a sharp knife however I do posses all the equipment you might need for archery, except for a target instead I've been using an old seat out of a car which is good but it's busted the majority of my arrows so that needs rectifying and right now it would be just as cheap to get new arrows as a target.

Should I have said I am terrible at writing lists?
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Music, movies, words in general and things you can do with them.
When I find myself alone and bored I tend to ask "What would I do here in event of a zombie outbreak?"
It's a good way to kill a couple of minutes.
I also spend my time trying to sing lyrics to different music, sometimes it works and some times I think "Damn, that wasn't good"
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Working, then seeing friends if there is time.
But then I also work Saturday so I don't really get a great deal of time in which to hang out but then I enjoy my work.
When I do get to go out I like to frequent the local tavern or ale house, where I might sup on a pint of the worlds finest ale, or trying some new drink.
Doing everything I can do to build the robots.
Or I am curled up reading something, either a comic book or an actual book, you know the sort without pictures, crazy right?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
When I was young I used to think you could build a satellite dish with a hub-cap and some imagination, I'd think about how cool it would be to be able to wire something together and be able to watch all those cool tv channels everyone else had.
Now I can afford a satellite dish, it's really not so important any more.

That's more silly than private, hmm how about I am not good at messaging people initially, nah again that's not so private as appropriate.
I do tend to scare people off, not entirely sure why or how, I imagine my over-excited geeky nature is off-putting to the general public.
He doesn't want to seem self obsessed so he writes in third person, in an attempt to seem more rock and roll but he suspects it's not working.

I tell you what, message me and I'll answer any question in lieu of a "private thing".
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You want to help me take over the world.
I'm serious, taking over the world and instilling a new society based on creativity and exploration, if you want in on the ground floor then message me and ask how.

Or if you just want someone to talk to, I'm good with that too.
Just keep in mind, I'm looking for friendship, which is strange I know but that's what I want, and if you made it this far there's a good chance you're willing to talk to a guy like me, so say hello.