🎶So this is a story all about how...
I'm tall, handy, and all that manly stuff girls love... when I'm not belting out Mariah in the car. I can change a tire and I know that nude pumps are hot as hell.
I go out of my way to step on that extra crunchy looking leaf...
I'm nice to everyone, often to fault, but I'll never change that.
I get along with everyone and always have a good laugh, even at my own expense.
Summer is the only season that matters - I enjoy golfing, jetskiing, Country Fest, Red Sox games, roofdeck brunch, and anything on the water.
I'm successful and well respected in my field, I have a great job that I enjoy, but as soon as I walk out the door I'm a complete goofball. No stiffs up in this hee-yah!!
My taste in music ranges from "You NEED to hear this" to "please don't judge me".
I am a younger Phil Dunphy - I get that all the time. For this reason let's visit the 2 parts of Phil.
He can reach the tall cabinets.
Great with electronics.
I used to dunk and feel like I could again if I didn't have this obnoxious FUPA, thank JP Licks for that one...
Kinda Girly Phil:
I grew up the sole man in my family so after years of female torment I'm a gentleman (purely out of fear).
Unfortunately I'm also the goto guy when girls need to vent... Hence the fear.
My yearbooks forever solidified my reputation: I was voted Most Talkative both in Middle School and HS.
I have a phenomenal tan - you'll have to accept that you'll always be 2nd best in that category...
Well educated (maybe even nerdy), down with the geeks, can flow with obnoxious sarcasm, and you dish it right back.
Nothing is more attractive than a sassy girl with a great smile.
You're basically a 20-something Bethenny Frankel - Ramona Singer fans, go play in traffic. If you've judged me for knowing them, good - you should, I'm a loser.
You better F'ing love ice cream!
....seriously, ice cream.