I am a father. I take enormous pride in that label. I mention it later but best up front - I consider myself non-monogamous and I have an amazing girlfriend ( Danielle3inabox ). We're both open to new people as time allows. It's been funny to watch the flood of male (and occasionally female) visitors to my profile since she linked to me. I know what y'all are thinking and, yeah, it's okay to be jealous.
So! On to less of a serious tone.
I've been told that a lot of PNW guys have emotions. That they're sensitive. They dress funny. Possibly they drink little polysyllabical coffee drinks in tiny cups while planning their next kayak trip down the slope of Mt. Rainier and other... outdoors....stuffs... I'm not from the PNW but, I have feelings. I know they're there. I'm empathetic. I know when you're mad and need to cry - the tears and snot and hiccuping stuttering jerking talking clues me in because I'm perceptive. And awesome. I'm just not from the PNW. I grew my beard to blend in after the first roving band of hipsters found me alone at night and beat me within an inch of my life. I took out 10 of them before it happened but I have kids so I need to stay alive for their sake.
I stay cheerful because if I start to brood, everything becomes dark and I put on my wizard hat and... no, my black clothes and dark makeup and then my coworker has to beat me out of it. She keeps a box knife and a screwdriver handy for that explicit purpose. So, I stay relentless optimistic because fixing cracked teeth is no fun. I HATE the dentist.
Where was I? Right! I'm not a PNW native. I like to hike and get out but I have kids so I'm not out every single freakin' days like a lot of these guys SAY they're doing. FYI, They're actually staying home and watching Extreme Hoarders instead. Men lie. True fact. I've seen it happen. Hiking from the kitchen to the couch, more like.
I do bike to work and back (16 miles!) when the weather allows because I like (bad) food and food likes me but I don't like having a chubby belly. Those are for puppies or kittens or babies. So, I bike. There's that. Well... I used to but now daycare schedules are all messed up so that's not happening. Now I'm picking up jogging on my lunch break at work to make up for it. I miss biking :(
What else? Read on brave ... reader... person... lady(????)...