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29 M Tucson, AZ

My Details

Last Online
Today – 4:10am
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Judaism, and laughing about it
Taurus, and it’s fun to think about
Graduated from masters program
More than $1,000,000
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Has dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently), Spanish (Poorly)

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My self-summary
Lets be real, nobody is good at writing these things. So, I'll just be honest. Not to brag, but I'm pretty awesome. Trust me.

Everybody always says "I love to laugh" and such; but honestly, who doesn't? Personally, I love to make others laugh. To me, there's nothing better than getting someone to laugh so hard they almost pee themselves. Everybody needs goals.

Anyway, I moved to Tucson to teach a year ago. So yeah, I'm a teacher. It feels weird to be called Mr. Soandso, and to be a real person; all mature and such. But, I'm slowly getting used to it. I need someone who can be brutally honest. One of the toughest parts of my job is sensoring my language (not f*&%king swearing) throughout the day. I want someone who is not afraid to be uncensored.
What I’m doing with my life
Teaching 5th grade. Taming lions. Training seals. Herding cats. Saving the world. Chasing my own tail. Take your pick. It all feels the same sometimes.
I’m really good at
Doing wheelies in wheelchairs. Pouring the perfect beer. Drinking that perfect beer. Lying to 5th graders. Back rubs. Cooking (no joke). Smoke signals. Finding humor in tough situations. Burning things. Directions and maps and stuff.

Also, I'm really good at useless trivia. Being a history nerd, I LOVE useless facts about esoteric topics. Part of being a teacher is having an answer for everything. But, I am useful at trivia nights.
The first things people usually notice about me
My nose or my sense of humor . . . usually the nose gets there first. But, I've learned to love my nose and (almost) everything it smells.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
My favorite movies are too numerous to list. I love film and it would be impossible to rank my favorite films because there are so many of them. Anything by Wes Anderson, the Coen Brothers, Scorsese, Tarantino, and the like.

Favorite Books: Catch-22, One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest, Calvin & Hobbes, Farenheit-451, Fear and Loathing in Los Vegas, Fight Club, Electric Kool-Aid Acid Test, For Whom the Bell Tolls, and anything by Kurt Vonnegut to name a few. Although lately I have only been reading non-fictions.

Favorite Music: The old stuff, the new stuff, the classic stuff, the punk stuff. You know, the good stuff.

Favorite Shows: Simpsons, The Daily Show (religiously), Community, Orange is the New Black, The Office, The Walking Dead, Futurama, Venture Bros., The Boondocks, South Park, Parks & Recreation, Breaking Bad, Mad Men, Arrested Development, Freaks & Geeks, Its Always Sunny, Archer, Saturday Night Live, Rocko's Modern Life, The League, The Wire and so many more. I'm a sucker for adult-themed cartoons like the ones featured on Adult Swim. The sillier the better.

I love food. I believe it is important to try everything at least once, so I very adventurous. So far, I have tried: Snake, gator, kangaroo, camel, turtle, elk, wild boar, rabbit, deer, and probably a few others I cant remember. After all, whatever doesn't kill you, could make you violently ill for days. But it's all worth it.
The six things I could never do without
My dog, Bella
Chocolate Milk
My Nalgene
Chocolate Milk (its worth repeating)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
"I'm fixing a hole where the rain gets it, and stops my mind from wandering.
Where it will gooooooooooooo"
On a typical Friday night I am
Nothing crazy, usually. A beer?
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I sing in the shower . . . badly.
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 21–32
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex
You should message me if
You appreciate good adventure and quality conversation.