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30 M Paris, France

My Details

Last Online
Today – 1:10am
6′ 3″ (1.91m)
Body Type
Strictly anything
Trying to quit
Atheism, but not too serious about it
Working on Ph.D program
Relationship Status
Relationship Type
Doesn’t have kids
English, French

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My self-summary
An American originally from Texas (unfortunately), I am currently based in Minnesota (questionably). I am in France for the summer to finish up my dissertation research. I am completing my phd in history, which is just as terribly exciting as it sounds.

I travel frequently and greatly enjoy doing so. I have previously lived in France in 2012-2013. My major accomplishments from that time include having made Jill Biden blush at a state function (Joe was too busy blazing his Camaro across the scenic French highways or else I'm sure we would also have had a memorable exchange) and almost spilling a drink on the French Minister of Foreign Affairs, which would have ended my diplomatic career before it began.

I have also lived in several other countries in the not too distant past. Many dramatic tales, such as epic deathmarches across Cairo and tense standoffs with Irish goats, have ensued. Incidentally, I have a completely rational and highly justified dislike of goats (see, for instance, this recent story: ). Seriously, goats are the worst.
What I’m doing with my life

Also, non-ironically taking pages out of the book of Ron Swanson. For instance, I am currently perfecting the art of shaving with a straight razor. Face/neck still in tact.
I’m really good at
Finding the absurd in the everyday.

Dancing (poorly, but with vigor).

Consuming dangerous amounts of coffee.

Giving terrible advice, which is useful in that now you know what not to do.

Crowd control.
The first things people usually notice about me
Usually, people hear me before they see me; the volume of my voice goes up all the way to 11.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Books: Confederacy of Dunces, A Canticle for Leibowitz, American Gods, Suite Française, Bleak House.

Movies: Children of Men, The Royal Tenenbaums, Amelie, City of God, Ghostbusters, Medellin, American Beauty, Seven Samurai

Music: Bowie.

TV: The Wire, Archer, BSG, Breaking Bad, Louie.

Food: I am partial to any sort of cuisine which shoots for boldness over subtlety.
The six things I could never do without



Good music.

Curiosity in all its forms.

Danger zone.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
SCIENCE* and trivial topics, such as the continued, unfathomable existence of the abominations known as 'Crocs.' So by 'trivial topics,' I mean 'other immensely important social issues of our time.'

* not actually a scientist, which is probably obvious from my flagrant use of the caps lock key.
On a typical Friday night I am
Being too loud at a bar with my friends. American spotted.
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I have three tattoos, two small ones and one very large one.

I have a huge man-crush on James Murphy of LCD Soundsystem. I am completely okay with this. I am also a huge fan of Louis CK, but who isn't? He is the voice of our times (sorry, Kanye).
I’m looking for
  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 23–35
  • Near me
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating
You should message me if enjoy alternating between fluffy conversations and deeply intellectual ones. I do this frequently. have a quirky sense of humor and/or enjoy this in others.

Disclaimer: I love cats, but, in an act of cosmic irony/tragedy, I am super allergic to them. So, sorry.