***BEFORE YOU ASK, YES, I DO SMILE, BUT IF I PUT PICTURES OF THAT UP, WHAT EXCUSE WOULD YOU HAVE TO MESSAGE ME? IM A MAN OF MYSTERY! MUAHAHA! :P*** I'm pretty easy going, low maintenance, and easy to get along with, and I also know the difference between there, their, they're, and thurr, I'm also fluent in ebonics, I'm a complete package right?!?. I'm usually a very active person but injuries from the military make it a little more challenging these days, and yes you may ask what happened lol. I'm originally from southern California, and even got lucky enough to get stationed there during my super sailor days, therefore I don't have very many friends in New Mexico, but I'm game for just about anything when im bored. I'm a very family oriented, no nonsense, giant dork, and I believe my dorkiness is part of what little charm I have haha :P. I'm usually the nicest guy in the world, but there have been times certain actions turn me into a dickhead, like guys beating on women, cheating, lying, and stealing... but don't be skurred! I don't bite....hard...unless you ask...in which case...I aim to please ^_^

Taking a much needed break after 5 years in the navy, 6 deployments, lots of paperwork, and somewhere in the ballpark of about 10 million energy drinks consumed lol. I'm usually bored. Im in the process of going back to school, for what? I haven't the slightest idea as of now, but I already have a bachelors in business, Then again, who doesn't these days right? Lol. Getting back into doing tattoos again, drawing ALOT, trying to make friends, which is usually a pretty effortless process for me, but I dont go out very much, because going out alone isn't my cup of tea, I'm a people person :-D annnnnnd, sleeping. I love me some sleep.

Detecting bullshit, if there was a legitimate allergy to it, I'm sure I would be severely allergic. Common sense..massages, making you laugh, either AT me or with me, spelling, dancing (NOT) singing (in the shower by myself...I'm amazing) break dancing, and by break dancing I mean trying to dance and breaking something...I'm white give me a break..uhhhh ohhh there's that word again lol. Being a ninja, AND a pirate (if you get that reference then you get a brownie) filling out retarded profile sections on OkStupid...I think? Video games....ok I'm done, Im making myself sound like I'm my own hero. 'Nuff said.

I Shit you not, That i look like Steve-o from jackass, I get it almost on a daily basis, I dont know if thats a good thing, or a bad thing, but i wish i made that kind of money. My Tattoos, My ruggedly handsome good looks (rigggghhhtt???) My cute little car, its a black hatchback girl car that sounds like it has a v8 in it and is extremely fast, contradictions are my favorite :-) anddddd I dont know what else, you tell me. And dont say that I look pissed off all the time...I'd rather be pissed off then passed on. Hehe :D

Books, I dont know how to read, Movies, Almost anything, Music, Pretty much everything, except opera...Gah, opera... Food, Everything. Maybe not Saurkraut, and im german, can you believe that? Shame on me.

The interwebz - I dont know what I would do if I couldn't see all you wonderful digital people. Entertainment at is finest. Plus I'm a nerd. :B
My new bed and My pillows - omfg my pillows, they're amazing, let me tell you.
Rockstar - if you tapped my veins you could probably get a caffeine buzz. I dont drink coffee it stunts your growth :-P
Comedy/laughter - think about it, you could be having the shittiest day on earth, but a good laugh makes you feel a little bit better. Or pee yourself which would make your day worse. Oops.
Music - it has more than one function. I promise. You believe me right?
Fam bam thank you ma'am - that's family for all you humans that dont speak engrish -_-

How wondefully awesome and fulfilling it would be to assasinate the westboro baptist asshats. And if you take ofdense to that, please message me your name, and ill add you t the list. And if you dont know who they are or what they do, google them, then message me. Why, and even how Joey Greco from cheaters Hardly...if ever, blinks... how contradicting it is when classy ladies on here have half naked pictures, dressed like street walkers in the club, or their bathroom mirror expect genuine, respectable messages, but get angry at messages like "hey you're hott"... Then, when guys like me try to send them genuine, respectable messages that aren't bullshit, and quite nice actually, they ignore them. I also spend alot of time thinking about YOU. Yeah you, I'm not creepy I promise! ^_^ also I think quite excessively about food. I'm an extremely fat kid stuck in a moderately fat mans body(I'm kidding I'm 170 lbs and 10% body fat haha). I'm a giant foodie, and my metabolism is retardedly fast, and I figure I will eat my little heart out until I'm 30, when the fabled metabolism supposedly slows down and people blow up like puffer fish. So, I got a good 3 years left to eat to my tummys content. I also spend a lot of time thinking about why the hell I'm taking the time to put all this information on here. Chances are you won't get this far, and I'm giving myself arthritis and carpal tunnel in my thumbs for nothing. Just humor me ok? :-) thanks!

Laughing at all these wondernuts profiles on OkStupid. Laughing at myself....watching TV, NERD RAGING :B playing video games maybe, like I said I dont have any friends here, and I dont drink, I'm also a homebody...I'd much rather be in the comfort of my own home where if I DID decide to drink, I can spend 15 bucks on an 18 pack, instead of 20 bucks on 4 beers at a bar. Inflation is a bitch. If you're wondering, YES, I do tip myself when I'm the bartender, its quite gratifying. Now quit judging me with your judging eyes Judgy McJudgerson!! Haha I'm kidding...kind of. I dont know, no night is typical for me I guess, including Fridays. They're kind of like birthdays after 25...you dont have anything else to look forward too, because you can already legally drink, and your car insurance has gone down. What's next? You tell me...

I've watched all three(?) twilight movies on my own free will. With a gun to my head...literally. I'm a big big fan of harry pothead...I mean potter.. and the lord of the rings, and I've watched every single episode of the vampire diaries. Not a bad show actually. Here you go judging again. Stupid interwebz!

You would fuck me. Cause I'd fuck me. You know how to take a joke. You want to join my westboro baptist assassination team, I've got a couple specwar guys too, it'll be fun. You want to tell me how appaling I am, or how offended you are that you read my entire profile and peed yourself, or maybe vomited a little, or want the 10 minutes of your life back, cause I have that power.
Who are you kidding, girls dont message guys...right? Or am i just that horrible..
Lets go first with "You should NOT message me if:"
-You cant keep your cooter in your cutoffs
-You dont have a FIRM grasp on how to communicate.
-y0u talk lyke dis y0 Tee hee <3<3 bubbly bubbly :-* kissies!
-You DONT have a sense of humor
-You cant put your phone down for 5 minutes
-You update your faceplace status every 3.4 milliseconds about the delicious salad you ate, or how you stubbed your toes.
-You have ex bf drama
-just message me anyways, I just want some attention! :-P