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26 Chicago, IL Man


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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–32
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, short-term dating

My details

Last online
Today – 2:22pm
5′ 8″ (1.73m)
Body Type
Mostly anything
Catholicism, and laughing about it
Capricorn, but it doesn’t matter
Dropped out of university
Art / Music / Writing
Doesn’t have kids
Likes dogs and likes cats
English (Fluently)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
To quote Peter Sellers:
"There is no me.
There used to be a me... but I had it surgically removed."

I guess I'm pretty human.

I try to be nice to people (sometimes it's fucking annoying, but most of the time it's pretty easy).

I think there are a lot of awe-inspiring things in the world (shoes, ships, ceiling wax, cabbages and kings, etc. )

I think people (mostly me) worry too much.

Also: according to OkCupid I have some trust issues, but I don't believe that for a second.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Taking walks after midnight.
Waiting tables.
Hosting parties that inevitably devolve into Janis Joplin sing-a-longs.
Writing the Great American Novel. Of course I'm writing it for The People of Tomorrow, so it's entirely in Esperanto.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Plunging headlong into an ever more Dos Passosian spiral of self-destruction/loathing/flagellation.

Which is to say: (like most of humanity) I am pretty shit.

I laugh and I smile and I dance, and I am constantly bombarded and bewildered by the utterly senseless and indiscriminate majesty of life.
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
Sad eyes and happy feet.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
Jim Henson and Lewis Carroll first and foremost. Pretty much everything I seem to enjoy proceeds from them.

Outside of those two (and in a random wordvomitthoughtorder):
Michael Chabon, Madeleine Peyroux, E.M. Forster, Elizabeth Strout, Flannery O'Connor, William Faulkner, Dante Aligheri, William Shakespeare, Fyodor Dostoyevsky, Victor Hugo, Craig Ferguson, Gene Kelley, Dan Harmon, Jean-Pierre Jeunet, Claude Berri, Marx Bros., Charlie Chaplin, Lucille Ball, Peter Sellers, The Beatles, Janis Joplin, The Doors, The Rolling Stones, Led Zeppelin, The Kinks, The Who, Johnny Cash, Bob Dylan, Stevie Ray Vaughn, Muddy Waters, John Lee Hooker, Freddie King, Stephen Fry and Hugh Laurie, Ted Griffin, Joss Whedon, David Simon, Puccini, Dvorak, Moussorgsky, Holst, Verdi, Mozart, E.L. Doctorow, .

Basically if it's even vaguely douchey or pretentious then I probably like it.

Also Gargoyles (/Greg Weisman). Gargoyles (/Greg Weisman) is fucking amazing. I love my cartoons.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Coffee/Black Tea.
The Muppets.
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Whether or not there is a way to reconcile how much I dislike Roman Polanski with how much I like his movies.
Whether or not major historical figures were as neurotic as I am.
Whether or not Adam and Eve had belly buttons.
Whether or not there are truly demons at work in this world.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Raging against the dying of the light (and the lack of late-night public toilets in Chicago- Je pense donc je pee).
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I am the dumbest man I know.

Also: I tend to think that most of you going apeshit over beards probably have some daddy issues. Beards are gross.
(Daddy issues are fine I guess).
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You know why a raven is like a writing desk.