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TheWugglyUmp

44 M Indian Orchard, MA

I’m looking for

  • Girls who like guys
  • Ages 28–44
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For new friends, long-term dating, casual sex

My Details

Last Online
Yesterday – 7:07pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 0″ (1.83m)
Body Type
Average
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
No
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Never
Religion
Buddhism, but not too serious about it
Sign
Pisces, and it’s fun to think about
Education
Graduated from university
Job
Transportation
Income
$30,000–$40,000
Relationship Status
Single
Relationship Type
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids
Pets
Has cats
Speaks
English (Fluently)

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My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
A miserable bastard, a horrible person. Seeking selfish & cynical women for awful experiences.

At the very least, it would be fair to say that I have always felt like a stranger in a strange land.

One respect in which I find the human practice of dating to be distinctly weird and paradoxical is that in order to be personally worth dating, you have to be a complete equation of personhood, in that you must know who you are, what you want, and have the wherewithal to be proceeding on your personal path to realization. Yet the whole point of dating is to fill a place of incompleteness in your equation. So I guess people just try present themselves as awesome, and let it be known that they want to annex your personal awesomeness to their own.

Which means that basically everyone wants to be one side or other of George Clooney's recent marriage. Or rather, at least to be partnered up to the corresponding other half of that union.

I am one of an infinity of possible equations of personhood, and could be regarded as complete or incomplete, depending on what someone felt like saying about me. I know that I am not the sort that anyone is actively looking for but that is not necessarily the same as not being worth anyone's while to find, and therefore, it is not at all clear to me how to proceed to find someone whose completeness and incompleteness would be nourished and supported by mine.

So here are some random factors from my overall equation.

I do not love mankind or any subgroup thereof. I am completely comfortable hating various groups of people and at the same time liking particular individuals from those groups who have managed to be worth liking and knowing despite the limitations and irritating traits that characterize others of similar background. I think stereotypes are usually pretty much dead on, and that not all men are created equal, and I think that people who contend otherwise just sound like a bunch of priggish elementary school teachers.

I think homosexuals should be able to get married, have kids, and take their kids down to the range to shoot their favorite assault weapons.

Just as I'm writing this, 10/12/14, my front yard is quite overgrown, because the last mow of the year wipes out the crickets. Crickets, on average, are better company that the general run of humans.

I score INTP or INFP on various incarnations of M-B. Which means that I have tendencies both to think and to feel, which clearly is a mistake. One should choose one or the other and not vacillate in a mamby-pamby fashion about it.

My diet is not ideologically based. I do not live on bacon-and-butter sandwiches, and I do not believe that kale chips really needed to be invented.

I am highly visual. Out in Nature I see beauty and texture everywhere, which is both my strength and weakness as a photographer. I could take endless photographs of rotting logs. I have to concentrate on trying to see what will make a strong image.

I have too many guitars, and too many guns. I do not, and cannot feel empowered. Not for any length of time, at any rate. It's like being a vampire, thirsting for the life which is not in you. It wasn't any fun at all, growing up and having the experiences that make you into such a person.

Once in a while I am referred to as a good writer and/or as the most sensual lover in the world.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I play the guitar, shoot photographs, hunt for buried treasures, and make stuff out of clay.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Photography
Massage
Cooking

I suck at playing the guitar and at pottery, but I do them anyway.

Seeing from other peoples' points of view. This is a curse. Nothing is more tiresome than others' points of view.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
I have a weakness for vampire novels. I love Ann Rice and I just finished Deborah Harkness' All Souls Trilogy. I am also a fan of CJ Cherryh, JK Rowling, JRR Tolkien. And I like the Twilight novels, too, so there.

Forrest Gump, Crouching Tiger Hidden Dragon, Big Fish, Ed Wood, Rushmore, Bagdad Cafe, Army of Darkness, and the first two Harry Potter movies. I like a lot of films by Buster Keaton, Juzo Itami, Woody Allen, and Pedro Almodovar.

Farscape, Star Trek, and the Muppet Show. Northern Exposure, Daria, Beavis & Butthead, South Park.

The B-section of my musical taste includes Brahms, Bach, Beethoven, Dan Bern, and the Beatles.

Food is good.
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Protein
Megapixels
Resolution
Creativity
Sunday mornings in bed making love
Guitars

How about six famous women I'd like to shag.

Drew Barrymore
Keira Knightley
Rachel Weisz
Hayden Panettiere
Morena Baccarin
Claudia Black
Adrianne Curry. Why settle for six.

How about some artists and photographers I like.

Ansel Adams
Alfred Stieglitz
Edward Weston
Imogen Cunningham

Amadeo Modigliani
Vincent Van Gogh
Gustav Klimt
Aubrey Beardsley
Alphonse Mucha
Claude Monet
Piet Mondrian
Paul Klee
Salvador Dali
Georgia O'Keefe
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
It may not be the first thing people necessarily notice about me, but eventually everyone notices that I think a lot. I'll just say that if you encounter a person who is truly capable of questioning their beliefs, they will likely have a shorter list of them than the average person does.

I have this idea for a very unpopular TED talk. It would be about how Social Justice has essentially become the new religion of the left. There's not of whole lot of people out there who would be pleased to learn that not only are religion and social justice total bullshit, but are in fact just different sets of nouns and verbs plugged into the same underlying source code. They both have their catalogues of saints and sinners, martyrs and prophets, sacred and heretical texts, and worst of all, their piety.
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Flying down to my estate in the Hamptons.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
You are one of the seven famous women mentioned earlier. Or if you are very pretty, politically incorrect, and have very loose morals, and a good sense of humor.