Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
*I DON'T HAVE A-LIST SO IF YOU 'LIKE' MY PROFILE I'LL NEVER
I'm genuine, down to earth, no baggage, no drama, no skeletons, no
bodies in the cellar - sarcastic, dry wit, self deprecating, and
really hoping to have a long term relationship, at least until my
wife is paroled (HA! Just making sure you're paying
Super athletic - runner, hiker, tennis, golf, hockey, racquetball,
I can do it all, seriously.
I'm not a big drinker, and when I do it's usually a beer.
I tend to be picky (to a fault) about who i date - hence why I'm
still single. I have great flake-radar - so if you're looking for
someone to support you while you lie out by the pool reading
InStyle, I'll sniff you out before our first date appetizers arrive
(and I pray you didn't order a Bloomin' Onion). Not that I own a
house with a pool.
oh, 2 things that might be a dealbreaker. I hate wine and I hate
sushi (I feel like I just alienated 90% of the women on this
by the way, I've actually had a few women contact me saying I would
be their soulmate if not for my hatred of wine and sushi.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
I write comedy; TV, punch-up on films, web series. Very up and
down. One month I'm house shopping, the next month I'm clipping
coupons. Scary but it suits me. I love being creative, making
people laugh (sometimes wince) love the oddball hours, and
especially the neurotic people I get to work with.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
faking how great it is being a bachelor when really I'd like to
find somebody awesome
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I have insanely blue eyes - I get stopped on the street by
strangers, seriously. wish I could make money off them.
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
BOOKS: Cormac McCarthy, John Fonte, I read lots of biographies
(lately bios on rock stars)
MOVIES: Im a huge TCM guy, so anything old I'm into. Noir,
Hitchcock, hard boiled 70's pics. But I'm not a total movie snob, I
was a teenager in the 80's, so can easily get caught up in a John
Hughes or super violent Stallone action pic.
I love seeing old movies on the big screen. I go to the Noir Fest
at the Egyptian every year.
TV - Better Call Saul, True Detective, Portlandia, Louie, 60
Minutes, Frontline, Game of Thrones, Veep, John Oliver, 30 for 30
on ESPN are amazing
I mainly watch sports on TV - football, hockey (go Flyers) every 4
years I really get into the Olympics.
MUSIC - anything but country. lately I've been really into classic
rock. And I'm obsessed with Sirius Radio's 40's on 4
FOOD: beware vegans, I eat meat!!!
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
Melatonin (I come from a long line of insomniacs)
my niece (she's 5)
laughing at stuff nobody else finds funny
the sound of a coyote at night howling off in the distance
my Mac (yeah, I know predictable, but I'm a writer so I'm always
scribbling on it and ordering Russian mail order brides)
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
why so many beautiful, intelligent women keep contacting me from so
far away. Do you guys like torturing me? I'm not looking for a long
distance relationship. I don't care if you're a Playboy playmate
with Super Bowl tickets, if you live in Bakersfield or Long Beach
it ain't gonna happen
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
lately, not much. Geez, filling out this profile is depressing the
hell out of me.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
...you don't wear tons of makeup and perfume
...you love animals and exploring nature
...you like thunderstorms
...you don't have Ebola
...you look sexy in jeans and a t-shirt
...you think the guy in the Papa Johns commercials is a serial
...you're hiking and come upon empty beer bottles, you pick them up
and find a trashcan.
...a perfect night out is to just lay in bed with me binge watching
some terrible 80's movie and eating take out Chinese food
...you love the desert
Who are you looking for?
This helps us know who to show you on OkCupid.