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Ostentatious80

35 Denver, CO Man

Man

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I’m looking for

  • Women
  • Ages 23–34
  • Near me
  • Who are single
  • For long-term dating, short-term dating, casual sex

My details

Last online
Yesterday – 8:03pm
Orientation
Straight
Ethnicity
White
Height
6′ 2″ (1.88m)
Body Type
Thin
Diet
Strictly anything
Smokes
Yes
Drinks
Rarely
Drugs
Sometimes
Religion
Buddhism
Sign
Aries
Education
Graduated from masters program
Job
Education
Income
$40,000–$50,000
Status
Single
Offspring
Doesn’t have kids, but might want them
Pets
Has dogs
Speaks
English (Fluently), Chinese (Poorly)
My self-summary
Write a little about yourself. Just a paragraph will do.
SOUNDTRACK TO MY PROFILE (play these in the background):
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SjpEL9ziWvk
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ik_tWtvar0Y
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bdchThXhxgA
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5vu2tyk8cvc

We should all live a life of histrionics. Wait we all do that now! Subtle histrionics. Do people do things NOT for attention? I'll even pick up my dogs leavings in a way so that everyone can see what I am doing so that I ensure to others that I am a good person. Look at me everyone! I'm a responsible citizen!

Honestly, I really don't care what people think. I hope you don't either. We are not in High School the Musical.

René Descartes once said, "I post on twitter, therefore I am."
or something like that. But I do not, so then do I even EXIST?!

I sometimes feel like an alien and should live on the moon. I'm a 35 year with playful tendencies. I teach theater and comedy to the young folk. In my ideal mind I am saving the children from the anemic expression and apathy that plagues the digital gen.

We were told in school at recess, "go play in that big field." "What do we do in a big field?" "I'm sure you'll think of something." And we did.

I've been in China for the last year and a half teaching theater to expats and Chinese kids. I learned the dripping water will burrow through the rock. And that most humans are basically just happy because of food & sex. We are happy when there is a prospect of eating, while we are eating and just ate. Same with sex.

What makes me happy? Connections. Music. Theater. My brain firing new synapsis. Making these things.

A little bit Rock n' Roll, a little bit Debonair, rugged. I'm Atypical, rustic, romantic, facetious and affable and I believe in Sutemi.

I backpack/hike.

I learned to knit and made a hat, but I believe I have forgotten. Maybe you can remind me?

I play several instruments and have notebooks where I jot comedy and plot ideas constantly.

Good ideas are beautiful butterflies and are so delicate to catch.

I also have the best friend I could have on the planet, Buster! He's a 5 year old beagle.
What I’m doing with my life
Don’t overthink this one; tell us what you’re doing day-to-day.
Taking risks, reading, soaking up information, picking apart and analyzing everything, talking to myself, finding balance, letting go, playing, taking the bus, playing gameboy, riding my bike, seeing variety within routine, creating efficiency, smoking amazing denver pot, loving others. Did I say reading?

I Laugh and laugh
please read my funny blog.
www.DailyEpicChronicle.Tumblr.com

Observing and sharing the absurdities of life.

I won a comedy contest a few years back and the photo they took looks like I'm getting my high school photo taken. Ask me I'll show you.

What do I DO do? I'm an artist. I am a certified theater teacher and can even teach college. I get to be creative when I work and I get to include lots of tomfoolery and kin-noodling around and generally act silly sometimes when I teach. I of course get down to brass tax and have high expectations.

Using "top shelf" grandiose words like rigamarole, discombobulated, bamboozled, shenanigans, behoove and kerfuffle, illumines.

I also love to creative new stupid combo words like GRILLIANT! or GRUTE. Grute is gross and cute like a dog pooping. Grilliant is Great and Brilliant.

Loving and Loathing when people shorten words like "the usj" (usual) or Obvi (obvious), Jelli (jealous), and some times its fun and sometimes its pretensh.
I’m really good at
Go on, brag a little (or a lot). We won’t judge.
Changing my look depending on the venue.
Cooking for real.
Taking charge when needed.
Telling Stories
Playing with kids (no seriously, its scary how much of a peter pan I am)
Drinking bourbon.
Doing Linda's voice from Bob's Burgers.
Boiling things down and seeing the bigger picture.
Using different words when I don't know how to spell the one I actually wanted to use.
Forgetting to flip the record.
Making you smile.
Lists.
Tetris
Mrs. Pacman
super mario
piano
describing smells with whimsy
catching my phone when i fumble
hearing a song and figuring out the chords by ear
empathy.
lesson planning
The first things people usually notice about me
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
My Generous spirit
My loud laugh
My goatee.
My long floppy hair.
My non-judgmental personality
My many moles (beauty marks) on my skin.
My very huge ....Eyes
My extremely massive veiny and throbbing... Heart.
Some of my students used to call me Hipster Jesus.
One time 3rd graders in china came up to me one her own and said, "I won't tell your secret that you are one of us and not an adult."
Favorite books, movies, shows, music, and food
Help your potential matches find common interests.
BOOKS:
Current: Wild
Recent: Bossy Pants
Favs: the jungle, boy, danny and the champion of the world, life of pie, lord of the flies, the things they carried, catch 22, peanuts comic strips, calvin & hobbes.

Louis CK's bit about reading Mark Twain to his kids is hilarious. He reads Tom Sawyer and it's fun and full of hyjinks. Then there's the quasi sequel Huckleberry Finn- this town fuck up black sheep with no parents using slang and the n word and getting into real trouble. He's like this book is not for kids!(yeah I don't do it justice- I tried)
HERE IT IS:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x4vxSf15aBA&feature=related

MUSIC:
DeVotchka Fanatic
You Love Me
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ITyqoUMwl5g

Beck is my Hero - Here's why
Hollow Log
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MqWTvUffID4&feature=related

First Aid Kit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HMrqBldlqzA

Smashing Pumpkins
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4aeETEoNfOg

The Kills
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KiLjuRG3hoE

5.6.7.8's
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2iVB8UZW_98

Mutual Benefit
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jM3v8nm0ac&list=PL86kDpFv65whcy1N1RJKtxm19T-sbhqO4

Tame Impala
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LnKUD_OztRE

Black Angels
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GHCp2-YcBeU&list=PLFCE5DB9CD008D4B5

Fleet Foxes
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IH2T4Ox1gls

Andrew Bird (Super Fan) - Give It Away
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HnK2epthEh4

Bessie Smith - Real 20's Jazz
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0TDNR3NEY0

Fiona Apple - Her Jazz Stint - After You've Gone
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CiFH3XDeq4I&playnext=1&list=PL549D11AB1AD508D0&feature=results_video

MOVIES:

I love horrible bad movies I can make fun of on top of solid movies.

All Documentaries / Exploratory Stuff

The perfect movie is:
Oh Brother Where Art Thou?

Movies I could Watch OVER AND OVER
Fargo
Half Nelson
Amadeus
Croutching Tiger
District 9
Rear Window
The Nightmare Before Christmas
Who's Afraid of Virginia Wolf?
Glengarry Glenross
Fear And Loathing in Las Vegas
There Will Be Blood
Stand By Me
Empire Of The Sun
Napoleon Dynamite
Confucious
True Man Show.
Perfume
Evil Dead, Planet Terror
Shawn of the Dead
Kill Bill
Ip Man

INFO NUGGET: when i was 13 I knew Ace Ventura and Dumb and Dumber by heart. Sadly I kinda still do...

FOOD:
Perogies
Indian
Ethiopian
McDonalds Fries
Cafe Vienas (Espresso and Ice Cream)
Roasted Red Pepper Sauce, Vodka Sauce
Chicken Salad
Russian Bakery Cream Puffs
I eat lots of Tomatoes.
Gummies

Over The Garden Wall
American Pickers
Marco Polo
BOBS BURGERS!
The Simpsons
Sanjay & Craig
The Daily Show
Silicon Valley
The six things I could never do without
Think outside the box. Sometimes the little things can say a lot.
My records
My piano
Mi Famiy/friends
Places in the world that I will one day visit.
Knowing that you will soon be in my life.
A theatrical project
Dark Chocolate
My dog Buster
Compassion & Laughter
I spend a lot of time thinking about
Global warming, lunch, or your next vacation… it’s all fair game.
Why do my student loan interests have something called a DISCOUNT FEE?!
(WHAT IS THAT!>?!?)
If people who live a whimsical life have a meet up group and where can I join?
How does the NYC Socially Awkward Meet Up Group work?
Why the heck do people always stop at the top of the staircase?
Can you photo bomb yourself?
This onion article is almost funny.
Write that down.
He/She is not actually doing anything on their phone, their just making it look like they are doing something!
"Needs more black pepper."
"What if a woman had a third labia?"
What a beautiful mountain view.
ahhh...silence....
What is my dog thinking?
Who actually buys this crap?
On a typical Friday night I am
Netflix and takeout, or getting your party on — how do you let loose?
Cooking
Dancing
Movies
Laughing
Having epiphanies...
420 friendly
The most private thing I’m willing to admit
I’m an empty essay… fill me out!
I wear my heart on my sleeve.

I like to play the board games Settlers Of Catan & Carcassonne and go to the meet up group.

I have played music in the subway and parks in NYC for money several times.

I'm a die hard Weezer fan - but not the pretentious kind.
(some rare shit for you)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_e8gHn0WGKc
(not full song - but i love the drawings)

Sometimes I narrate my own cooking like I'm on Iron Chef.
You should message me if
Offer a few tips to help matches win you over.
you have a "replies selectively" red light. Come on! It doesn't take long to write a three sentence email.

You think this is funny:
http://www.collegehumor.com/video/6663206/brunchables
You want to have a kitchen dance party
You contemplate the universe and it's absurdities.
You love the grey areas of life.
You want to play some retro games
You want to go ice skating, roller skating, biking.
You want to play settlers of catan
You want to buy ingredients and cook a meal together
You are competitive at mini/putt putt golf
You like picnics and patches of green grass.
You like the outdoors.
You use the word amazing for its true value and not just to describe A gray's papaya hot dog
You'd want to shoot my bb gun for target practice together