I see myself as one of over six billion [and counting] jumped-up primates clinging to the surface of a minor rocky planet trapped in the gravity well of a Class G2 star somewhere in the outer reaches of an unexceptional spiral galaxy - one among billions of such islands of matter [and dark matter] embedded in an ever-expanding void.
We may be the only animals we know of that are aware of our mortality, and that feel the frantic urge to pursue a life crammed with "meaning", as if we expect our existence to have significance in the greater scheme of things. Many of us spend most of our lives chasing after that elusive "meaning" , sometimes so much so that we miss out on simply getting whatever pleasure we can out of our fleeting, unlikely existence. We are the lucky ones.
I think that this is one of the pitfalls of having brains that specialise in pattern-recognition. [For more on this, look up "pareidolia".]
I do not think that we occupy any special position in space and time or that homo sapiens is any more remarkable than any other creature, both extinct or extant, however much we may want to believe our disproportionately large brains set us apart. Knowledge, and technology, without wisdom and responsibility can be a dangerous thing.
I have been known to spend more than is probably sensible on my computer and consoles, whether it be playing games, learning to use and experiment with Blender and The GIMP I prefer to do this by tackling simple projects presented as tutorials than to learn to use the software in a more conventional manner.
I have, for the time being, set aside trying to teach myself computer programming and Algebra. I think that I would benefit more by working on those skills I need to learn or hone in order to maintain
a certain of work at my place of employment. That means seeking advice on compiling reports and articles [something I do in Microsoft Word] and dislodging writer's block.