Ce n'est pas une profile.

I come from everywhere, and expect to end up nowhere.

Take from that what you will.

According to OkCupid, I'm a professional bondage-nurse who hates old people, has in irrational phobia of clipboards, and can't eat chicken. Oh, OkCupid--you know me all-too-well. Except I love chicken, so I don't know what the hell they're trying to get at with that one.

I've just recently realized that my OkCupid account was still active while flushing some 300 bad jokes out of my old email account, and figured I might as well update and rejuvenate the old thing. Not that I really need to fix it that much--I'm essentially the same Ordinary Eternal Machinery I was before. Just a little older.

Anyways, about me... I've graduated just this year form the University of Windsor, hoping to get a literary-esque career in the near future, and am currently working as a mop-jockey at the hospital ('til I can find a career-y job).

As far as recreational talents go, I've recently picked up Poi (fire-spinning), took basic swing dancing an age and a half ago (though I doubt I remember any of it), and will be willing to try pretty much whatever anyone's willing to teach me.

Wasting my time. Or working and writing, depending on your point of view.

Wasting my time. Or working and writing, depending on your point of view.

My ginormous tits. Everyone's eyes always snap right to my big ol' watermelons. It's rather boorish, really.

Seriously, though--I don't think it's really fair to even attempt to answer this question--it's kind of like asking you to think for someone else. Sure, you could get a good idea about how vain someone is/thinks everyone else is... but everyone has their own preferences.

I don't really do 'favorites'; there are too many good apples and oranges out there. I guess I'll give it a shot, anyways.

(A) Couldn't say. I'm currently hammering through Gunslinger and J-Pod. Probably not a good idea to double-fist books when one is a super-pretentious mind-job, but whatever. Leonard Cohen's "Stranger Music" anthology is pretty neat, though--I'd say, as far as poetry books go, that's pretty far up there. That and Roger Bell, bp Nichol, old Bob Dylan stuff... damnit, I suck at this, don't I?

(B) More or less anything from anywhere. The most recent films to really rock my world are Tiger in the Snow and The Diving Bell and the Butterfly. I've also got a soft spot for old Samurai/Spaghetti Westerns and zombie flicks.

(C) I have a huge spectrum of musical taste. From Ministry to Etta James, and just about every wierd-ass tangent you can take in between. I'm pretty partial to the older, 'stranger' musicians (Tom Waits, Beck Hanson, Les Claypool), but that might just be because there's way too much stuff coming out to keep track of, and I'm far too lazy for the scenester snobbery scene.

(D) Anything and everything. Most styles of cuisine are really, really good in their own respects when they're done right.

I've moved a lot. Doing without isn't that big a deal.

It sucks being without a computer, though; I don't watch much TV, so it's kind of my window to the outside. That and I don't like to write things by hand.

People. Nobody in particular, just people in general.

Either working or sitting around. I'd prefer to be going out, watching movies, having fun, etceteras... but, alas, this is my hometown, and the locals I've known have since scattered to the wind.

So, yeah. Just sitting here and going batshit-loco. Why oh why did I ever leave the city?

Pretty much anything you're willing to ask, I'm willing to answer.

You should message me if you want to chat, chill, meet, or watch me set myself on fire. Y'know, same old same old.